My wife has a credit card...

katejo

JournalGirl wrote: »

If I was a wife, looking after a man's children, and the only money he allowed me access to was child benefit, I think I would be tempted to snatch a little freedom myself if the opportunity presented itself.

I agree. Maybe she does have problems with budgeting but, if I were married and looking after kids at home, I could not tolerate having no access to a joint bank account and being allocated 'pocket money'. How would she manage if you were suddenly in an accident and left in a coma? She deserves a share of your earnings.

Johnnytwostep

no she doesn't deserve anything, she has shown, based on the OPs info, nothing but reckless spending. That's why she should be brought under a tight leash and have to account for everything.

enthusiasticsaver

My husband and I have had a joint account since just before we were married thirty two years ago and both our salaries are paid in there and we both have access. This was the case when our children were small and for the three or four years I was not working. I tend to look after the money as my husband is not interested in checking interest rates on savings etc but it has generally always worked for us. It does mean that there is no secret squirrelling away of money and we both know what we spend on each other but I tend to use my credit card to pay for his presents, paid off in full of course and we would not tend to buy expensive items without discussion. We don't have debts though so it has never been an issue.


I think if one person in the relationship is not good with money it is better the other one take control as debt issues can escalate into major relationship problems.

coldcazzie

tripled wrote: »

Women can't take in complicated information.

Are you actually joking??

tripled

coldcazzie wrote: »

Are you actually joking??

I think the link supplies all the supporting evidence I need.

The next thing you know they will think they can drive cars.

sushistar

I appreciate that couples need to find a pattern that suits them, and that patterns of household finances have changed over time. However, I do think that people in committed long term relationships (ones that they intend to last 'for ever') need to be pulling in the same direction, talking about their financial goals and aspirations together as a couple. If you've promised to be with someone forever (if you're married, for example) then it would seem strange to keep finances the one area of your life that you don't share.

This is, of course, far more relevant if one partner temporarily or permanently earns less - becAuse they are raising kids, have health issues, or the couple have decided that they prefer one person to work less so they can take care of the house. In these circumstances, separate finances become quite problematic, because the market economy monetarily values work outside the home far more than work inside the home -and yet in terms of contribution to the overall assets of the household, there is little difference. As an example, imagine paying a stay at home parent for the work they do - £3.50 per child per hour (childminders rates), minimum wage for the housework and laundry, 24 hr on call surcharge, £10 ph for admin assistant services (household organisation, bills), holiday pay, sick pay, NI... if the employed partner paid for all those services, they would soon realise what an economic service stay at home partners are providing! So the idea that the finances are separate and the couple has their own money is strange - if the working person saves up private money, the stay at home partner is subsiding the working partner, through unpaid labour.

BadBehaviour

The fact that OP's wife has her own bank account with just child benefit being paid in doesn't mean she doesn't have access to her husband' money or that she's left to live on peanuts, come on.

I have my separate bank accounts but use my partner's card for the shopping etc and he's ok with this arrangement. He earns a lot more than me after all. He is not watching every penny I spend either. I don't buy anything that is not necessary anyway. I am personally not gonna squander someone else's money.

I wouldn't be able to live on what I earn on my own, so of course he's got to help... we still have separate finances, though and I like it this way.

Mara_uk7

And now the OP has thrown the cat among the pigeons and never come back to his thread ! A wind up merchant ?

diceydeb

Yep my thinking too....mmm a good well constructed post for a newbie, I think not !

mcpitman

Glitterbaby wrote: »

The 1950's called and it wants its misogynistic attitude back.

Look up the big words before using them. :mad:

I do not hate or mistrust women. :T

This set up works for us. And yes, she does need to ask permission before taking any money or bank charges would appear and bills not get paid.

So, for example, if my wife was in the middle of nowhere and needed fuel and the cc bill hadn't cleared she would be stuck.

In fact, just read the all of my thread before bleating on and using big words you don't understand.

This is MSE and our attitude to money is aligned to MSE theory. :money: