Foster Review - Appeal

tea_lover

ilikewatch wrote: »

It's nothing to do with the fact that they sleep in separate rooms, the confusing part is that they are heterosexual, yet choose to live in a pseudo homosexual relationship - thus creating confusion if/when they form simultaneous heterosexual relationships.

The OP has stated that the other person is her partner. There's no suggestion at all they will be forming other relationships.

tomtontom

I would agree with WestonDave, you cannot claim discrimination because you are not a protected group.

You may have other grounds to appeal, but you would need someone with an understanding of their criteria to advise on them.

ilikewatch

You would probably have found it easier to be accepted if your relationship was homosexual but without a physical element

LEJC

ilikewatch wrote: »

But the situation you describe is nothing like a child (probably) being removed from their parents/guardian and sent to live with two people of the same sex, who are both attracted to the opposite sex, but have made decision to live together as if they were married!

Im not sure how me justifying whether the situation is different or not is going to help the OP with the question thats been posed...so perhaps its best that the thread continues in the practical way that the OP would appreciate.
clearly the Social Services involved do have issue with the set up however we live in a world where one man and one woman sharing a bed and being married shouldnt be the only option when considering fostering children...


OP I hope you get some clarification on your appeal.

sams247

Thing is we've been friends for 24 years, partners for 14. We recently had a difficult time because of this judgement, before that we were ok. We raised 4 children together. We are in a loving, caring, sharing relationship, better than a lot of marriages. Both of us were abused by men, one of us was attacked by another man. Neither of us want a man in our life. Thats to explain it to you who are confused but to a child? A child would have a loving, caring, patient home to be safe in whilst the family or SS sort things out. Hardly a flow of children sought!! What a mind that view comes from! I dont care if any parent likes whips, chains, dressing up as santa or doing it with lolly pops, but I do care if they work at being decent people and good parents.

Money_maker

sams247 wrote: »

Neither of us want a man in our life.

This might be a source of concern too, a child needs to be raised with a balanced view.

Did your childminding business ever take off?

Ronaldo_Mconaldo

Why not just tell them that you're sleeping together or do you have to make a big issue out of everything?

z.n

Surely the only pertinent issue is the way in which the OP lifestyle might affect a child living in the household. Issues such as commitment to this family unit, financial arrangements on death etc must be more important than whether two people share a bedroom. Any person joining the household would get used to the arrangement pretty quickly.

No practical advice to suggest but I wanted to offer support as some posters seem confused with the arrangement whereas I see it more as following a long historical tradition of single women living together (maiden aunts/nuns/bereaved friends etc) but without religious or sexist baggage. We assume these days that historic co-habiting females may well have been gay and it is 'right-on' to be ok with that. But what exactly is wrong with two women co-habiting in a co-operative way without a sexual relationship or blood tie. Many children might be relieved to be away from a sexually charged atmosphere-fostering is not all about playing happy traditional families but about providing a supportive and safe temporary environment for a child in need. I would have thought a placement of this type would be a handy one to have available. Good luck OP.

Alikay

Perhaps SS don't consider the emotional attachment between you and your partner as strong enough to withstand the stress of fostering since you're both heterosexual women. I must admit I find it a little odd too - though I can easily comprehend two straight women living together as friends, and also two lesbians who don't have sex with each other, though may be very emotionally connected. What is it that makes you classify your relationship as "partners" rather than "best friends"?

freshstart11

To me it is the use of the words, hetrosexual but they are Partners.

I am not saying I disagree but I can see why application may have been rejected x