Nice People 13: Nice Save

LydiaJ

silvercar wrote: »

To Lydia I know of plenty people who have altered their level of religious observance to suit their partner.

To those advising joining classes or clubs that are male dominated, does the reverse work? Do men ever join knitting clubs or the WI to meet women?
It is nice that people feel comfortable in their own company but I get that some people don't feel complete without a partner.

Well, if you meet one who'd like to change his level of observance to suit mine, then send him in my direction.

I'm not incomplete. I am OK on my own. But life would be more fun, as well as easier, with a partner. And, as Sue said, I miss feeling wanted. I don't mean that I feel rejected all the time - I'm well aware that I have many friends and family members who value and appreciate me - but being wanted by a partner is different, and I miss it.

zagubov wrote: »

I had a pal at uni who went on a basic cookery course before moving out of home. Found it prepared him really well for living independently but that he also met a lot of women on the course.
Another pal went to evening classes to learn to type. Loads went to ballroom dancing classes.

I rather suspect that the "join a club" thing works better for the young. Whenever I go to anything and meet delightful people, all the over-40s are already married, and the under-40s are naturally not looking for a 45-year-old widowed mother of 2. I promise that when I have the headspace for it, I will nevertheless try to go to some places where there might be some men, though. Happy, everyone?

PasturesNew wrote: »

I don't want a partner, but it'd be nice to have somebody close by in the world that actually cared about what happens to you etc. Somebody to call upon, ask - somebody who can sort out smoke alarm batteries, miscellaneous shelf fitting and general house/garden maintenance would be good too .... and a 2nd income would be like winning the pools.

I can relate to most of that. I would say that I don't need a partner rather than that I don't want one. And I can do the smoke alarm battery thing by myself, and get the helpful builder down the road in for any DIY that's beyond me. There aren't specific tasks that I need a man to do - I'd just like a second adult to share the load, regardless of how the work is divvied up. But as you say, PN, it's the person (equal, mutual, adult person) who cares, and whom one can care about, that is the most important bit.

GDB2222

PasturesNew wrote: »

I'd love to live in the world of "just call a little man". I live in the world where I have to either grit my teeth and do something, or put up with it, or go without something.


I don't want a partner, but it'd be nice to have somebody close by in the world that actually cared about what happens to you etc. Somebody to call upon, ask - somebody who can sort out smoke alarm batteries, miscellaneous shelf fitting and general house/garden maintenance would be good too .... and a 2nd income would be like winning the pools.

One concern is the number of people on TV programmes (e.g. 24 hours in A&E) who were randomly found by somebody and an ambulance called. That doesn't happen if you live alone, you end up as the "body's lain undiscovered for X years"

This happened to the elderly lady who lived next door to us in Sheringham. She had an uncomfortable 24 hours lying on the floor.

Is there anybody you can call 'just nipping up a ladder, and I'll call you back in ten min'? A sibling, maybe?

zagubov

ukmaggie45 wrote: »

Thanks for the greetings, but I think it's tomorrow! 1st March - my computer tells me it's 28 Feb today... Of course my computer may well be wrong, in which case I'm in serious trouble on loads of stuff! :eek:

Oh dear. I saw it on the banner at the top of the forum page. It's gone now. Martin must have been looking forward to it so much he brought it forward.;)
https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5186558

Yorkie1

PasturesNew wrote: »

One concern is the number of people on TV programmes (e.g. 24 hours in A&E) who were randomly found by somebody and an ambulance called. That doesn't happen if you live alone, you end up as the "body's lain undiscovered for X years"

I think the fear of something happening and having nobody to help or call for assistance is one which is already on my mind, and I'm only 44.

My nan (who was in her 80s and had been widowed probably 10 years previously) luckily had excellent neighbours who kept an eye open for her, and when she didn't open her curtains one morning they rang the police - she'd had a fall and so the emergency services were able to get to her promptly.

LydiaJ wrote: »

Well, if you meet one who'd like to change his level of observance to suit mine, then send him in my direction.

I'm not incomplete. I am OK on my own. But life would be more fun, as well as easier, with a partner. And, as Sue said, I miss feeling wanted. I don't mean that I feel rejected all the time - I'm well aware that I have many friends and family members who value and appreciate me - but being wanted by a partner is different, and I miss it.


I rather suspect that the "join a club" thing works better for the young. Whenever I go to anything and meet delightful people, all the over-40s are already married, and the under-40s are naturally not looking for a 45-year-old widowed mother of 2. I promise that when I have the headspace for it, I will nevertheless try to go to some places where there might be some men, though. Happy, everyone?



I can relate to most of that. I would say rather that I don't need a partner rather than that I don't want one. And I can do the smoke alarm battery thing by myself, and get the helpful builder down the road in for any DIY that's beyond me. There aren't specific tasks that I need a man to do - I'd just like a second adult to share the load, regardless of how the work is divvied up. But as you say, PN, it's the person (equal, mutual, adult person) who cares, and whom one can care about, that is the most important bit.

Lydia, if I could thank all your posts over the last few days more than once, I'd do so. +1 for me for all of them :T

Yorkie1

So, I've got 2 assessments left to do and one (non-assessed) creation for a webinar at the end of this week.

I've done the first assessment (deadline this week) and the creation - a "mood board" (images and pictures on 1 PowerPoint slide) - is also done. It's supposed to be a creative representation of what we've learnt over the course, and what we might do next.

I think they might regret asking me to be creative, because the flippantly creative side of me seems to have been let loose ... :eek:

So, the first picture is a combination of two pictures of shallots and onions from the allotment shop. Commentary = "We’ve learnt shallot [a lot] and know our onions". I have a picture of 3 types of seeds to show that a lot of ideas have been planted, some of which might take longer to germinate and get to fruition than others. And a picture of our weighing scales to represent weighing things up - evaluation by another name

And that's just the first 3 images. I'm most proud (aka lateral thinking) (!!!) of the picture of a camellia, which can be shortened to a camel, which has two humps, which represent the two practical assessments we had to get over, which we did and are a real achievement (particularly for me with my anxiety).

Yes, I think they'll regret this one :rotfl: :A

GDB2222

Happy, everyone?

I think I'm being told off again.

LydiaJ

Yorkie1 wrote: »

Lydia, if I could thank all your posts over the last few days more than once, I'd do so. +1 for me for all of them :T

Awww. Thank you Yorkie.

Yorkie1 wrote: »

So, I've got 2 assessments left to do and one (non-assessed) creation for a webinar at the end of this week.

I've done the first assessment (deadline this week) and the creation - a "mood board" (images and pictures on 1 PowerPoint slide) - is also done. It's supposed to be a creative representation of what we've learnt over the course, and what we might do next.

I think they might regret asking me to be creative, because the flippantly creative side of me seems to have been let loose ... :eek:

So, the first picture is a combination of two pictures of shallots and onions from the allotment shop. Commentary = "We’ve learnt shallot [a lot] and know our onions". I have a picture of 3 types of seeds to show that a lot of ideas have been planted, some of which might take longer to germinate and get to fruition than others. And a picture of our weighing scales to represent weighing things up - evaluation by another name

And that's just the first 3 images. I'm most proud (aka lateral thinking) (!!!) of the picture of a camellia, which can be shortened to a camel, which has two humps, which represent the two practical assessments we had to get over, which we did and are a real achievement (particularly for me with my anxiety).

Yes, I think they'll regret this one :rotfl: :A

:rotfl:
I think they'll love it.

GDB2222 wrote: »

I think I'm being told off again.

No. I value the NP's encouragement to me not to give up on the idea that I will ever find another man, and I particularly value you for having more insight into how I feel about the faith issue than most. So thank you. But let's move the conversation on to something else for a bit now, shall we?

Generali

silvercar wrote: »

If it makes PN feel better, my mother had a similar problem and called a man. I think she paid £40 to solve a simple battery change.

To Lydia I know of plenty people who have altered their level of religious observance to suit their partner.

To those advising joining classes or clubs that are male dominated, does the reverse work? Do men ever join knitting clubs or the WI to meet women?
It is nice that people feel comfortable in their own company but I get that some people don't feel complete without a partner.

I picked my Uni on the basis that it was 4:1 women:men ratio.

zagubov

Generali wrote: »

I picked my Uni on the basis that it was 4:1 women:men ratio.

I went to one that had the lowest women:men ratio in the country.:eek:

The average age of the students was about 31, almost 10 years older than I was.

It had its own airport, (which had its own fire brigade) and if GDB goes gliding, he could do it there, (I had some lessons there). Although there's at least one aerodrome I've used that offers gliding lessons about 20 miles closer to London.

HAMISH_MCTAVISH

zagubov wrote: »

gliding

I loved gliding, it was my first introduction to piloting at school at the age of around 13 or so, nothing like a bit of string taped to the canopy to illustrate the fundamentals of flight.

Bizarrely, I've never gone back and flown one since....:o