Nice People 13: Nice Save

SingleSue

tom9980 wrote: »

No need to feel guilty the government provide a few hundred quid extra for children like that, occasionally funding for 1 to 1 for the worst cases. Overall funding is lacking so you get situations where a child with cerebral palsy get a few hours a week funding which is done by the existing TA rather than an extra person because the school cant afford to employ more staff. That child desperately needs 1 to 1 permanently and my wife knows with 30+2 extra at times means she has a hard time trying to get him to do the work and progress with the resources she has while teaching all the others.

You then get the child whose parents are alcoholics but considered "respectable" who do nothing with them. The Aspie child who is physical bordering on a thug yet is the smartest in the class who has parents who smoke drugs and dont care their son has harmed others. A girl with suspected dyslexia, dyscalculia and dyspraxia who gets no extra help as its undiagnosed. A boy with a speech issue the parent has ignored the advice from my wife for 3 years to go to the doctor and now is being passively bullied for it so she's causing havoc with complaints. None of that includes other general neglect and the many parents who dont read or sit and write with their own children.

So much change that is never thought through and teachers never get consulted, the school meals thing was a disaster for my wifes school, no cooking facilities so food is cooked off site and brought in by van. The school is too small and overflowing so no spare rooms to sit them in to feed them so a class room has to be used. To do that lessons finish early to set up the tables and chairs. They then have to stagger the kids into the room because it cant hold them all so food gets cold and the funding only enables one dinner lady so no way you can have each class eating at their own desks in multiple class rooms.

Politicians have no clue on the day to day realities in these schools. Worse the likes of the NUT make Teachers out to be complaining about pay and pensions rather than the workload and paperwork so its easy to make them out to be leftist lazy nutters who have long holidays and high pay. I would certainly sack at least one teacher at my wifes school if i had the power too so i dont think i am too biased.

As for James i suggest you get him into classrooms ASAP as a volunteer, i dont think i could ever recommend anyone doing this work load at the current pay rates for hours worked its just not a way to live life.

Youngest is statemented for 25 hours 1 to 1 a week and has been for the last 10 years. He is a complex autistic with EDS, severe asthma, bowel disorder, Irlens, food intolerances and food allergies.

Josh is Aspergic with EDS, damage to his brain due to lack of oxygen at birth, partially deaf, bowel disorder, moderate learning difficulties (low verbal understanding and extremely poor short term memory), he was also statemented for 20 hours 1 to 1.

Josh was an absolute blooming nightmare at primary school, he was a thug, he was very aggressive and violent, so much so he was perm excluded from his school at the age of 8. However, I did care, I cared very much about the impact it was having on the other children but I suspect there were parents who thought I didn't care at all or that he had no discipline at home etc.

My life was hell until we discovered the key to calming Josh down....music. It was discovered quite by accident when he kept banging things at the pupil referral unit he was attending at the time (he spent time with private tutors and then the PRU before re entering main stream school for year 6), so they got a drum kit in. Absolutely inspired that was, he went from a child who was completely uncontrollable to one who could be calm and even more amazing, he was actually talented at playing music!

In year 6 and back in mainstream school, he was awarded student of the year, in year 11, he gained 10 A-C GCSEs including English and Maths and not one blow up at school in all those years.

Sometimes it is not the lack of parenting, sometimes it is the fact the key to unlock the child has not been discovered and I am very passionate in making clear this fact as I too was accused by teachers of not caring, not parenting correctly and that hurt...a lot. I was quite literally tearing my hair out, I had a break down because of it, I had tried absolutely everything, all the parenting classes you could think of included but nothing was working at all.

It has been a long hard slog with both boys and the work continues even now despite them now being 16 and 18 and it will continue for the rest of my life.


Re James, he has been working with children for some time now on a voluntary basis (Youth clubs, Beavers and in the course of his part time job) and in his first year at uni, was helping tutor children for the 11+ and GCSEs...hasn't put him off yet (but then he comes from a mad family :rotfl:)

fc123

HAMISH_MCTAVISH wrote: »

Couple of years difference I think if that.



Yep...

Hence why packing away some assets and pensions now. Doing your own thing is a lot easier with a property or two owned outright.

...it sort of isn't though as though the there may be less pressure to earn mega bucks, you have an internal pressure to be the best at what you can do.....as whatever you achieve is solely your own victory (or failure)....which is the best bit when you succeed and get all the spoils for yourself (and the taxman),

vivatifosi wrote: »

You sound as though you smell wonderful spirit. What a thoughtful treatment. Hard to believe that it's two months already. Your posts are pretty much back to your old level of clarity too, which is great to see.

I can't believe it was 2 months back.....do they have any timescale to recovery Spirit?



OK, got one for Nikks when she finishes.
Saw it in the Independent but the link is a bit iffy as you have to scroll down but the Amazon link has the relevant reviews just under it. Made me laugh.
It's a shiny, satin Halloween / Fancy Dress costume for female PhD'ers. Enjoy


http://i100.independent.co.uk/article/women-with-actual-phds-review-sexy-phd-costume-on-amazon--gJPL-5W-De




AMAZON link http://www.amazon.com/Delicious-Womens-Darling-Sexy-Costume/dp/B0053O1KHA#customerReviews




I had no idea there were so many lurkers on this thread.....was going to have a moany grumble about something and now feel to ashamed to do so.

neverdespairgirl

We are back from a sneaky half-term holiday in Cornwall. We enjoyed our time at Watergate Bay in the summer so much that we decided to go again. After all, doesn't swimming in the Atlantic spring to all our minds as a good idea as we head into November......?

We were staying really near the beach, just a 5 minutes stroll from the slipway. There were surprising numbers of other people who also shared our Bright Idea, and we had a fab time. OH took his tent, and down sleeping bags, so one of us could curl up in the Temple of Kerm with the baby while the other and Isaac went surfing / bodyboarding / swimming. Once it got too cold, you could rip off the wetsuit, dry quickly, and dive into a sleeping bag. Problem solved!

Kermie has, sad to say, developed an alarming tendency to awaken early, full of the joys of living, and ready to start his day. 7am is just about bearable. 6am just seems... early. But a couple of times I put him in the sling, and went to watch the sunrise on the beach, which was untouched by human footprint since the last high tide.

fc123

Sounds idyllic NGD, weather hasn't been too bad either.


Just out of interest what wetsuits do they wear and can you swim 'properly' in them (ie; able tomove and not feel restricted)?


I only ask as I want to continue Lido swimming through the winter but need something that covers up as, though the pool is heated, the entry and exit is too cold for me. Looked at Speedo ones and they are £270 but they are meant for racing. Wondered if I shouldn't try a burkini instead but that would be cold too I think.

neverdespairgirl

They aren't the sort of wetsuits you can swim properly in the lengths sense - they are more suited for sea-swimming-surfing with waves. OH and I both have 3 mm zip up the back wetsuits, Isaac has one which pulls over the head, I think it's 3.5mm. They are marginal for the Atlantic at this time of year - they are really summer suits not winter ones. We also all wore wetsuit shoes or boots and gloves.

Generali

Got my next PET scan on Tuesday morning next week (Tuesday night your time). Fingers crossed.

Generali

So Melbourne Cup Day.


Left work at midday for the pub, the PA having left in advance to secure a table.

$5 On Glue Factory in the 1:15. Lost.
$5 on Cat Food in the 2:00. Lost
$10 @ 7-1 (8s in the new money). Won despite being 3rd from the back at The Jump (from the off in England). There's a battling horse. Quality one too.

Off home to lie down and sober up. .

GDB2222

Generali wrote: »

Got my next PET scan on Tuesday morning next week (Tuesday night your time). Fingers crossed.

Good luck. It would be crass to say that I did not know you have a pet, wouldn't it? So, I'd best not say that, even though it would be great to get it off my chest.

tom9980

SingleSue wrote: »

Youngest is statemented for 25 hours 1 to 1 a week and has been for the last 10 years. He is a complex autistic with EDS, severe asthma, bowel disorder, Irlens, food intolerances and food allergies.

Josh is Aspergic with EDS, damage to his brain due to lack of oxygen at birth, partially deaf, bowel disorder, moderate learning difficulties (low verbal understanding and extremely poor short term memory), he was also statemented for 20 hours 1 to 1.

Josh was an absolute blooming nightmare at primary school, he was a thug, he was very aggressive and violent, so much so he was perm excluded from his school at the age of 8. However, I did care, I cared very much about the impact it was having on the other children but I suspect there were parents who thought I didn't care at all or that he had no discipline at home etc.

My life was hell until we discovered the key to calming Josh down....music. It was discovered quite by accident when he kept banging things at the pupil referral unit he was attending at the time (he spent time with private tutors and then the PRU before re entering main stream school for year 6), so they got a drum kit in. Absolutely inspired that was, he went from a child who was completely uncontrollable to one who could be calm and even more amazing, he was actually talented at playing music!

In year 6 and back in mainstream school, he was awarded student of the year, in year 11, he gained 10 A-C GCSEs including English and Maths and not one blow up at school in all those years.

Sometimes it is not the lack of parenting, sometimes it is the fact the key to unlock the child has not been discovered and I am very passionate in making clear this fact as I too was accused by teachers of not caring, not parenting correctly and that hurt...a lot. I was quite literally tearing my hair out, I had a break down because of it, I had tried absolutely everything, all the parenting classes you could think of included but nothing was working at all.

It has been a long hard slog with both boys and the work continues even now despite them now being 16 and 18 and it will continue for the rest of my life.


Re James, he has been working with children for some time now on a voluntary basis (Youth clubs, Beavers and in the course of his part time job) and in his first year at uni, was helping tutor children for the 11+ and GCSEs...hasn't put him off yet (but then he comes from a mad family :rotfl:)

We all know you do a great job, even when things were tough you kept trying, my point is too many parents don't care, the boy I speak of has parents who don't care.

My wife has a cousin whose school is graded outstanding she recognised he was autistic but the school refused to get him tested and a statement instead saying he was a troublemaker and regularly suspending him. He is now home schooled and was indeed found to be autistic and is flourishing, the system is not fair and deeply flawed to allow him to slip through the net like that.

It is interesting you mention that josh has a key, my mum used to work in a special school with some very disabled and troubled children, they all often have a key that engages them. She found some very unconventional methods to teach some of them to read and write when so called experts decided they had no chance of doing so. The boy at my wife's school has a key too.

James is clearly getting good experience but do understand he is only experiencing the best parts right now which is why he may benefit from more direct experience in school so he can see the worst parts of the job. Teaching lessons is amazing it's all the other parts of the job that make it difficult for newly qualified teachers, a bit of exposure to that will help him decide if he can cope.

GDB2222

ukmaggie45 wrote: »

Ivyleaf asked about my blood test results. Bit of a sore point really. :mad: Had letter from surgery telling me to go in to get results from practice nurse, so OH called and made appt. Turns out she can ONLY talk about cholesterol, and we should have made doc appt for Vit D and all the other results. (why couldn't they have said that in the letter they sent?) But can't get to see doc I need to as he's booked up for weeks. <rolls eyes> So nurse suggested I see the locum I saw last time, who said I should go and see someone who knew me and had seen me before. If I can't see "my doc" I'd rather see a lady doc, but they don't do as many sessions. So Gawd alone knows when I'll find out what rest of test results are, prob be lucky to get them before Xmas! :mad: :eek:

Cholesterol up again, but can't be bothered with the ghastly diet and won't take statins, so if I drop dead I drop dead, at least I wouldn't have to find the rest of papers for my tax accountant! :rotfl: I have serious problems eating anyway, so any kind of diet is difficult/impossible. Poor OH tries very hard to cook wonderful meals, but it's very hit and miss. Sometimes I just find I'm not able to eat whatever it is after a couple of mouthfuls. Very frustrating for OH.

Still not managed to find a home for one of our things we put on Freegle, but the guy who came and took book case yesterday evening took a storage unit I'd meant to list but hadn't got round to yet, so that's good. So still have a pine Ikea desk to dispose of, if I don't hear from 3rd person (!) I've contacted tonight I think I'll just re-list it. Lady who picked up other Ikea desk was pleased with it, and even came prepared with an Ikea allen key - now that's organisation for you! :rotfl: It wasn't needed in the end, plus we've got plenty of them, but it struck me as a really good idea.

It is interesting that you don't take statins. Apparently, lots of people don't, presumably because of side effects. Have you tried more than one?

I sympathise with your OH about the food. It felt incredibly frustrating with MIL when she couldn't eat more than a few crumbs. There was definitely some anorexia there.