OH and his "do it tomorrow" attitude

TheEffect

Maybe it's a man thing.

I'm male, and adopted the 'I'll do it tomorrow' approach when I was moving. I admit, it came very close to the deadline, and not much had been done... however... a quick call to my drinking buddies and we got the whole house moved in a single day.

Problem solved. Worrying over.

Sometimes I worry I'm a little too laid back. :beer:

Solsol

Are you my hubby?! lol

I could manage to pack in two weeks but the truth of the matter is we have no idea how long we will have between exchange of contracts and completion so it could be less than two weeks I'm using that as a rough guess.

I also still suffer bad headaches and dizziness from a blood clot I had which was discovered just after I had LO. The clot was in the sinus vein in my head and therefore still have problems with bending down so things like gardening and anything I need to "stoop" for are just out of the question really or else I end up bed ridden for a few hours - this is why I need OH to pull his finger out sometimes!!

aileth

Ah yes, mine suffers from this... I'm very much the same as you, do things first and relax after. He is the put things off as long as possible, relax in the mean time, and then either forget he had to do it or scrape past. We both work full time.

I can't count on my hands the amount of times where he's for example had to go to the tip, he has agreed to pick me up after work and we'll go for some drinks, he has had the whole day to go to the tip and instead leaves it 15 minutes before pick-up time, there's of course a queue, and he's been an hour late meeting me. When I ask him why he didn't do it in the morning, the reply is a shrug.

He also has the DIY jobs around the house (mine are finances and housework). Our garden was full of rubble when we moved in and he spent (all due to him) a good few hours putting the rubble into sacks. We've lived at the house for three years and said sacks are still where they were put three years ago. In fact they're not so much sacks anymore as they've degraded so now it's simply a pile of rubble, so he's effectively going to have to start all over again (probably in another three years).

I asked him once, "Wouldn't you rather do everything that needed doing in the morning and then have the rest of the day to relax, without anything on your mind?" He shrugged and said, "I suppose so." C'est la vie.

lulu_92

TheEffect wrote: »

Maybe it's a man thing.

I'm male, and adopted the 'I'll do it tomorrow' approach when I was moving. I admit, it came very close to the deadline, and not much had been done... however... a quick call to my drinking buddies and we got the whole house moved in a single day.

Problem solved. Worrying over.

Sometimes I worry I'm a little too laid back. :beer:

That sounds like my OH! :rotfl:

We're both very laid back and we tend to designate our days off to do housework (Tuesday for him, Sunday for me and Saturday we both do it). We tend to do a big clean once a month and get rid of loads. Right now all that needs doing is some washing (that's the one we always put off) and some ironing and that's about it.

onomatopoeia99

Solsol wrote: »

I suppose we have quite different attitudes towards things - I like to get things done ASAP so we can then sit back and relax once it's done whearas OH will put it off until the very last minute and relax up until he can drag himself off the sofa to do it!

I'm like your OH. In his situation, I could imagine writing something on here along these lines:

"My wife always has to do stuff straight away as soon as she decides it will need to be done eventually. It wears me out just thinking about it. I always get things done in time, but not immediately as I don't see the need to launch into a job straight away if it doesn't need to be done for another month. How can I get her to slow down, sit down and relax? Why can't she just accept me as I am?"

Since I live alone, there's no-one to nag me into doing stuff, so I do it when it needs doing. It still gets done by the time it's needed, it just spends longer in a state of not being done yet.

I was like this even as a child. I always did my homework on time and was top of the class in almost every subject, but if it was set over the weekend I would do it on Sunday afternoon, not on Friday evening. It never bothered me having the work "hanging over me" because I knew I would get it done. I sense it bothers you.

I don't have suggestions for you, because very little could encourage me to get on with (for example) mowing the lawn sooner rather than later!

Chatalouge

I'll finish this tommorrow :rotfl:

mgdavid

Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.”
― Albert Einstein

Gloomendoom

"Never do today what you can put off until tomorrow, because tomorrow you may not have to do it."

My grandfather shared this piece of advice with me. He was a wise man.

lulu_92

"Can't someone else do it?"

-- Homer Simpson

Happier_Me

My DH is better now than he was say four years ago but I haven't found an easy fix for this.

We have two kids, DH works 47 hours a week, I work 40. DH hates the thought of the kids going to before/after school every day (so do I if I'm honest) so I not only juggle work and pick up/drop offs but also take the kids to and from school two days a week. DH openly admits his job is more like a social event whereas mine is high pressured. Throw in the flexibility and clock watching and the long hours I often work I think this has knocked at least 20 years off my life expectancy:D

However he does help more than he has ever done. He cooks more than I do, he will fill the dishwasher (he's doing this now), do some ironing and he often washes and dries the clothes. I don't need to ask him to do these things anymore, he just helps. But we still play the waiting game with some things.

One of the things I did to get the message across a few years ago was to just STOP. I would ask him to fill the dishwasher and when it didn't get done I would wait. I think the record was two nights of takeaways after ALL the pots were used up before he caved and did the dishwasher. You have to be prepared to live like a slob though. Fortunately I am:D