Child not eating school dinner

fiscalfreckles

Surely the school would have told you if they felt there was an issue? Maybe he is eating more than he's telling you?
I'd stick with school dinners for a bit, get the school to report back to you on what is actually happening, rather than relying on what your son tells you - in fact I would stop asking him as that is kind of building up the issue when it may be better to play it down.
Tell the school that you'd like feedback and use that to make a decision.

burnsguitarman

notanewuser wrote: »

I'm awaiting the outcome of school dinners on my DD. She's 3, and her school's policy is that all children have school dinners in nursery and reception (we don't get this for free though). I looked at the menus and there was a choice each day that DD would happily eat. She's not a fussy eater by any means, and loves veg and fruit etc, but she's reluctant to eat sauces like ketchup and gravy (not a problem in my eyes at all) and won't touch mashed potato. I figured that would be fine provided she had the choice of the other starch.

However, I've found out this morning that the nursery children aren't given any choice - the school cook decides and plates up the food. Parents get no say unless there's a medically diagnosed allergy.

We parent gently. In the past 2 years DD has come to eat bread, cheese, jacket potatoes and rice (which she wouldn't touch previously) by herself, simply by not being pressured to eat them because we say so. School's approach is to reward children for eating their lunch - which I absolutely oppose too.

Have been told to take it up with the Head (her default answer). Either way, I won't be paying £12 a week for her not to be eating!

Your Daughter is only 3 and as you say has come to eat things previously refused, by herself. Who's to say she won't overcome her reluctance to eat sauce and gravy etc, if its served to her.
As her friends are eating she may just join in. Has she already tried lunches for more than a couple of days? It may take a few weeks to settle and become adventurous.
Incidently, Why is she not provided with a free lunch? Is it a private school?

Indie_Kid

burnsguitarman wrote: »

Your Daughter is only 3 and as you say has come to eat things previously refused, by herself. Who's to say she won't overcome her reluctance to eat sauce and gravy etc, if its served to her.
As her friends are eating she may just join in. Has she already tried lunches for more than a couple of days? It may take a few weeks to settle and become adventurous.
Incidently, Why is she not provided with a free lunch? Is it a private school?

The free lunch is for key stage 1 (reception to year 2?) children. notanewuser's DD is 3 years old, therefore, not entitled to free lunches.

burnsguitarman

Indie_Kid wrote: »

The free lunch is for key stage 1 (reception to year 2?) children. notanewuser's DD is 3 years old, therefore, not entitled to free lunches.

Hah, Sorry, I didn't realise this.

[Deleted User]

I used to be a very fussy eater when I was a kid. There used to be a stand-off between me and the dinner lady that lasted the whole dinner hour, and I even used to avoid other children's birthday parties. I grew out of it though, nowadays I can clean a plate before the starting gun has stopped smoking.

notanewuser

burnsguitarman wrote: »

Your Daughter is only 3 and as you say has come to eat things previously refused, by herself. Who's to say she won't overcome her reluctance to eat sauce and gravy etc, if its served to her.
As her friends are eating she may just join in. Has she already tried lunches for more than a couple of days? It may take a few weeks to settle and become adventurous.
Incidently, Why is she not provided with a free lunch? Is it a private school?

We're in Wales.

She's been presented with gravy and mash on hundreds of occasions in the past 3 years and has never touched it. She starts lunches at school next week as they've only been going for a couple of hours a day for the past 2 weeks.

Frankly, it's not the end of the world if she doesn't want to eat gravy, and I don't agree that someone else should choose every aspect of her meals and coerce her into eating it! It's what leads to eating disorders and obesity !!!!!!!

notanewuser

Indie_Kid wrote: »

The free lunch is for key stage 1 (reception to year 2?) children. notanewuser's DD is 3 years old, therefore, not entitled to free lunches.

No, it's because we're in Wales and the free lunches are for children in England only.

Pricivius

It seems there are several different views and options available. I was a nightmare child when it came to food:

From aged 7 at primary and then throughout secondary school, packed lunches were not an option. School dinners had to be paid for and there was no opt-out for my parents. For 11 years, they paid for meals that I barely touched. There were a few exceptions - fish fingers and chips, chocolate sponge... but I genuinely cannot remember any others. I would estimate I ate a meal every fortnight. Towards the end of secondary school, I had to go to the cafeteria for an after-school meeting. I walked in and was amazed at the new flooring and tables - I didn't recognise the place. Apparently, it had been refurbished 6 months earlier, but this was the first time I had seen it.

My parents figured I was being given edible food and it was my choice if I decided not to eat it. I always had a good breakfast and evening meal and certainly did not starve. I guess I just got used to not eating during the day and it was not a problem. I was certainly not a sickly child and if anything, was a little chubby!

I remember one time when we were served semolina at primary school and my whole table of 8 kids refused to touch it. The teacher made us sit there until at least 2 of us had eaten some. Three kids burst into tears. One lad tried some and then asked to be excused, before being sick in the playground on the way to the toilet. That was the last time they tried to force us to eat.

burnsguitarman

notanewuser wrote: »

We're in Wales.

She's been presented with gravy and mash on hundreds of occasions in the past 3 years and has never touched it. She starts lunches at school next week as they've only been going for a couple of hours a day for the past 2 weeks.

Frankly, it's not the end of the world if she doesn't want to eat gravy, and I don't agree that someone else should choose every aspect of her meals and coerce her into eating it! It's what leads to eating disorders and obesity !!!!!!!

Yes I agree. I know it's easier for the kitchen staff, if every child has the same, but I think the children should be able to choose if they want accompaniments to it.

Buttonmoons

My DD was a nightmare for food - She ate anything and everything until she got a bad sickness bug - after that she seemed to exist on toast, yoghurt, cereal and chicken - no joke!

She's 8 now and I did send her to school dinners everyday and still do - UNLESS there is something she genuinely dislikes - always vegetarian day - Hates pizza and Mac & Cheese, and the other options are something like cheese spread sandwich (oh yum) and quorn fillets (she's tried it - she said it tasted like nothing)

I'd persevere, My DD whilst not fantastic with vegetables, now eats loads of salad, loves falafels, could eat curry till it came out her eyeballs - but give her things like ketchup, pizza, potatoes, burgers and she wont touch it.