Spent 4 years pretending it's all OK

Bobarella

NOA - is it worth speaking to a broker and gaining their opinion before you approach your lender? We have a wonderful woman who we've kept in touch with for over 7 years and she has saved us thousands. Good ones are worth their weight in gold.

Sorry the family are driving you a bit mad. If it's any consolation my 6 year old threw a strop when I told him he couldn't take his tablet to a christening this weekend!

NoOneAround

themarsbargirl wrote: »

Why not tell DD to buy a dongle if she want the internet so badly? You can get payg ones....I've been looking at it for when I go back to the caravan so I still have internet there having got so used to it here.

Thanks MBG - good suggestion but if she wants to do that she needs to sort it out herself - am getting very hard in my old age;)
she's earned a fair bit this summer and am very proud of her as it will help me not having to give so much financial support next year, but I am trying to get out of the habit of sorting everything out for her!
Got to be cruel to be kind is my motto at the moment:D


We did go down to see my parents Friday/Saturday, and she managed without this time round.....


xx
NOA

NoOneAround

Bobarella wrote: »

NOA - is it worth speaking to a broker and gaining their opinion before you approach your lender? We have a wonderful woman who we've kept in touch with for over 7 years and she has saved us thousands. Good ones are worth their weight in gold.

Sorry the family are driving you a bit mad. If it's any consolation my 6 year old threw a strop when I told him he couldn't take his tablet to a christening this weekend!

Thanks Bob, I have a couple of days off now and will try and find someone - I feel like I don't want to go to anyone local as it's such a small world and believe it or not I am still very embarrassed about people finding out our financial situation. Sad isn't it:o


Re: technology and kids :eek:- I think parents have a real challenge these days.....
DS has spent 2 weeks at home doing nothing but screen stuff. :mad: He wanted to see a friend at the weekend (when they get together it is all screen stuff too) and I said no - I needed space to not do anything, and I asked him to think about all the things I have asked him to do that he has totally ignored me on in the last two weeks, so I was going to ignore his requests too. !0 minutes later he was practising his music :rotfl: which he needs to - he was meant t o take Gr 7 in the summer term but didn't practise). His teacher said he could do better than just pass so postponed exam entry so he could practice more over summer to get a distinction in Autumn term. Teachers words - not mine.


Feel a big big whinge coming on so am going to go and do something practical:)


Have a good Monday everyone
Today I'm on admin catch-up and filing
then need to think about VAT returns (should be easy - not much action this quarter).
Not so hot today so might get into the garden for a bit.
Can't ace ironing or housework:(
xx
NOA

Brogden

Hi NOAh

Long time no speak !

I can't say anything 'cast in stone' but I would seriously consider speaking to your current mortgagees before talking to a broker. Find out what they can offer you.

My lenders repeatedly offer me their various fixed rates, discounts etc. I did once say 'can I have this because I'm a 'dirty debtor?' They said 'yes, our deals are available to all customers, even dirty debtors with arrears and carp credit files !!' At the time NOAh, I did have arrears in addition to a carp credit but I signed the bit of paper and onwards and upwards . I think I'll be doing it again later this year. If I tried to replace the mortgage elsewhere I would be absolutely stuffed and I would hate to try :eek:!!

Even if you do later ask a broker to help, what's the harm in knowing what your current lenders can offer?

Glad you are keeping busy and hope the maritals are in reasonable shape . I too am frustrated with the world of 'screens' and think we are losing the plot if I'm honest. I think we have forgotten what life is for !!

Lots of luv,

Brogden x

LastFewSteps

NoOneAround wrote: »

I am still very embarrassed about people finding out our financial situation. Sad isn't it:o

Not at all sad NOA

Nobody except dh has ever known about our situation, not years ago in the bad times and still not now in the somewhat easier times, and I plan to keep it that way.

I'm considered stingy for not wanting to spend money and people seem to assume I therefore have a lot of pennies tucked away in the bank :rotfl:

We are all entitled to a private life

Bobarella

Hi NOA
It is VAT time again isn't it. I got my notification to file at the end of June, but my accountant normally hunts me down when it is time. I know you get a certain period to pay before they get shirty. Can't remember what it is though.
Anyway Brogden talks sense about talking to current provider too.
Sorry your son is annoying you a bit.

Bob

NoOneAround

Brogden wrote: »

Hi NOAh

Long time no speak !

I can't say anything 'cast in stone' but I would seriously consider speaking to your current mortgagees before talking to a broker. Find out what they can offer you.

My lenders repeatedly offer me their various fixed rates, discounts etc. I did once say 'can I have this because I'm a 'dirty debtor?' They said 'yes, our deals are available to all customers, even dirty debtors with arrears and carp credit files !!' At the time NOAh, I did have arrears in addition to a carp credit but I signed the bit of paper and onwards and upwards . I think I'll be doing it again later this year. If I tried to replace the mortgage elsewhere I would be absolutely stuffed and I would hate to try :eek:!!

Even if you do later ask a broker to help, what's the harm in knowing what your current lenders can offer?

Glad you are keeping busy and hope the maritals are in reasonable shape . I too am frustrated with the world of 'screens' and think we are losing the plot if I'm honest. I think we have forgotten what life is for !!

Lots of luv,

Brogden x

Brogden Sorry I haven't been in touch but... (my favourite phrase at the moment - here and in life in general:() but I don't like posting when I'm :mad: even though everyone is so supportive at those times and a real boost.


Am very frustrated at the moment as nothing seems to be moving anywhere in the grand scheme of things, even though when you stop and think there are lots of mini steps of 'progress'. Yor mortgage stuff all makes sense too.
Marital stuff? OooH Brogden I didn't know you cared:p. All's quiet-sh - because I vent on here and then I get on with what I need to do. I have treated myself to a lovely new dress £70 bargain which I found in Debnms whilst shopping with my mum a couple of days ago. I was looking at the sale rail full of lovely skinny dresses for skinny people, mum saw me looking and said " you should get the one on the model" I had a look for it (not on sale) and there 3 left on the rail including a 12!!!! That NEVER happens so I decided it was meant to be and
didn't bother trying it on -jst bought it to try at home. And it fitted perfectly (just need to shorten it as I don't have legs up to my armpits;)). Its elegant, stylish , flattering and I feel very nice in it and the family will just have to lump it and go without food for a week! We all need to lose some weight anyway. :rotfl:Just nee to buy some masks now - seen some on line - lots and lots under £10 each. Anyway with a house full of girls I'm sure you wanted to hear that ......Not!:rotfl: Sorry:)


:kisses3:xx
NOAh

NoOneAround

LastFewSteps wrote: »

Not at all sad NOA

Nobody except dh has ever known about our situation, not years ago in the bad times and still not now in the somewhat easier times, and I plan to keep it that way.

I'm considered stingy for not wanting to spend money and people seem to assume I therefore have a lot of pennies tucked away in the bank :rotfl:

We are all entitled to a private life

Thank LFS,
That's exactly how I feel too. I do feel I have let down some very good friends though in terms of not wanting to see them, one couple in particular- partly because we never do anything but work, partly because of children drifting apart, partly because I ended up crying the last couple of times I have bumped into my friend, and I'm afraid that I will blurt it all out. I am trying to think of a way to put it right this summer.
xx
NOAh

NoOneAround

Bobarella wrote: »

Hi NOA
It is VAT time again isn't it. I got my notification to file at the end of June, but my accountant normally hunts me down when it is time. I know you get a certain period to pay before they get shirty. Can't remember what it is though.
Anyway Brogden talks sense about talking to current provider too.
Sorry your son is annoying you a bit.

Bob

Hi Bob
I do all our accounts and returns as we are not a big business - in fact don't really need to be registered any more as DH has gone back to work. We get a month after end of period - I think that's the standard time but we do cash invoicing (I think that's what it's called) so that we only pay the VAT when we receive the payment, not on invoice date. this gives us an extra 7 days on top of the standard month. You didn't really need to know any of that as your accountant deals with it :rotfl: Seems I am having that sort of day!


I'm trying really hard not to get annoyed with DS and DD's laziness through the hols. I had figured if I could get them on board the three of us could have decorated the whole house - (mainly painting) and landscaped the garden and put some raised beds in and tidied up in general and made it all look like a show home like you see in magazines......:rotfl:.....No I wasn't expecting much was I?:p


xx
NOah

NoOneAround

Debt Update
Another One of the CC debts now defaulted/transferred to PRA (never heard of them) so no interest or charges - review in six months.


Currently paying £70 a month towards debts = 1% a year:(:)


Seems like the self managed route is working so far, despite the dread and build up to contacting to them, it is getting easier and they have all been helpful.
I look forward to the time I feel less guilty about it all.