Giving lifts to work colleague who I dislike

Guest101

Ragtimeplayer wrote: »

My manager is causing me stress by asking for lifts and because they do the rota, I have realised they are deliberately putting me on the same shift as themselves to enable me to give them lifts.

We don't have a great relationship at work as they have quite an aggressive attitude and I would like to stop giving them lifts but cannot think of a way of saying it without causing acrimony. I am not going out of my way by giving them a lift but it is sometimes awkward when we have had a not great shift together and then at the end of it they start being nice to me so I will give them a lift home.

A couple of other people are sometimes able to give this person a lift but they usually ask me. I am not confrontational but it really riles me, how can I tell them no without looking mean in front of my other workmates?

Start charging them for it. They'll soon move on to someone else.

Quiet_Spark

jaydeeuk1 wrote: »

Or man up and tell them either to pay you or get their own f*cking car.

^^^^^^^^

That one, with emphasis on the F word to make sure the pi$$ taking !!!!!! knows you won't take any krap.

Daz2009

Tell the manager you think it's only fair that they get a car and give YOU free lifts to and from work.
Cheeky b'stard !

arcon5

Him asking regularly is fair enough. It's his double personality, sneaky tricks and lack or contributions that's the problem.

On one side, despite being a manager, he is also just a colleague so say 'no, I work with/for you, thats all, get your own car'.
On the other side, he is in a great position to make life hell - so how good is HR department?

I swaying towards the i'm not going straight home technique.

kirkofski

It really annoys me that people think its OK to ask for lifts without suggesting they pay their way. Getting a lift with someone else is almost always more convenient than a bus yet nobody would dream of getting on a bus without paying.


I was going to suggest the motorbike idea as its the only real option that wont look suspicious and if your riding it on a CBT you cant carry passengers legally anyhow.


I've had people in the past ask for lifts and never mention payment(a couple of one-offs wouldn't bother me) so now I don't give them to anyone other than a few good friend's in work, if anyone else asks "I'm stopping off at my parents on the way home for tea".


Hope you get it sorted.

Strider590

Ragtimeplayer wrote: »

when we have had a not great shift together and then at the end of it they start being nice to me so I will give them a lift home.

Most managers are psychopaths, what you describe is sadly largely normal behaviour.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/victorlipman/2013/04/25/the-disturbing-link-between-psychopathy-and-leadership/

Ragtimeplayer

If it was just a lift after work I could probably sway it by saying every time they asked that I was busy or going the other way etc but its also before work as well.

I do an early shift with them once a month and they now walk to my house so they don't have to get a taxi in the early hours. Its so frustrating and I do not want to spend my working life lying about it and can't see why I should have to either.

whitewing

You just have to talk yourself into not minding it then.

Ragtimeplayer

whitewing wrote: »

You just have to talk yourself into not minding it then.

If only it was that easy!

I am really annoyed because the person in question has totally messed my home life up by putting me on the opposite shift to my husband because by doing so, they will be on the same early shift as me. I am determined not to give them a lift on that early shift as I would be mad at myself for giving in. I just need to grow a pair I suppose...

whitewing

Speak to HR to see if you can have some similar shifts to your husband due to the detrimental effect on your personal life.

Or speak to ACAS and see how to put a request in writing for the same. This then makes it about you and your husband (and lift sharin with him?) rather than anything personal with the manager.