Giving lifts to work colleague who I dislike

Ragtimeplayer

My manager is causing me stress by asking for lifts and because they do the rota, I have realised they are deliberately putting me on the same shift as themselves to enable me to give them lifts.

We don't have a great relationship at work as they have quite an aggressive attitude and I would like to stop giving them lifts but cannot think of a way of saying it without causing acrimony. I am not going out of my way by giving them a lift but it is sometimes awkward when we have had a not great shift together and then at the end of it they start being nice to me so I will give them a lift home.

A couple of other people are sometimes able to give this person a lift but they usually ask me. I am not confrontational but it really riles me, how can I tell them no without looking mean in front of my other workmates?

whitewing

Either schedule things in that you have to do on the way in or the way back, or look on it as an opportunity to build a better relationship with your manager and mentally treat it as work still. Or come to a financial arrangement with the manager. I think there are lift sharing websites that suggest reasonable rates.

I hate lift sharing.

Mojisola

Ragtimeplayer wrote: »

My manager is causing me stress by asking for lifts and because they do the rota, I have realised they are deliberately putting me on the same shift as themselves to enable me to give them lifts.

We don't have a great relationship at work as they have quite an aggressive attitude and I would like to stop giving them lifts but cannot think of a way of saying it without causing acrimony. I am not going out of my way by giving them a lift but it is sometimes awkward when we have had a not great shift together and then at the end of it they start being nice to me so I will give them a lift home.

Find some reason why you're not going directly home (even if it's only in your head) - visiting a friend, going shopping, calling in on a relative, etc.

As the relationship at work isn't good now, it's likely to get worse once you're no longer acting as a taxi so I would start looking for another job.

Gavin83

Tell them if they can't show you respect at work then you'll be stopping the lifts. At the end of the day your doing them a favour, they're likely to protect you somewhat and listen to reasonable requests.

Take advantage of it.

InsideInsurance

Develop a new passion for yourself or your partner/kids that means you are going somewhere else after work most days and thus be unable to provide a lift to them.

Alternatively develop a taste for black/death metal, say rotting christ or cannibal corpse which you evidently have to listen to at volumes fractionally below those that would cause your ears to bleed.

Of cause if its not for the commute but a trip to another office or such then personally I find the 5p per mile extra you can claim compensates for irritating coworkers

duchy

I'd be inventing things to do after work -or a new sport you do before work -or a parent who needs to be taken shopping or whatever.

I'd still give the occasional lift if it suited me but if they aren't offering to pay then you have no obligation to do it.

Or just learn to say "Sorry but I'm not going in your direction today" You don't need to give any further explanation.

George_Michael

A length of rope, a pair of disposable gloves, an old axe and a few butcher's offcuts left behind the passenger seat may well get them to decide not to travel with you any more.

PasturesNew

I'd go for the "not going your way", then alter my journey so I turned in/out of the road from a different direction if I had to........

jaydeeuk1

Park the car offsite, and say its off road and you're getting the bus.

Or man up and tell them either to pay you or get their own f*cking car.

BeenThroughItAll

All these suggestions to find other things to do, or reasons to not go home are all very well, but the best way to deal with things is just to be honest about it.


If you don't want to give them lifts because you feel that the two of you don't get on, just say so. Honesty really is the best policy.

missbiggles1

Ragtimeplayer wrote: »

My manager is causing me stress by asking for lifts and because they do the rota, I have realised they are deliberately putting me on the same shift as themselves to enable me to give them lifts.

We don't have a great relationship at work as they have quite an aggressive attitude and I would like to stop giving them lifts but cannot think of a way of saying it without causing acrimony. I am not going out of my way by giving them a lift but it is sometimes awkward when we have had a not great shift together and then at the end of it they start being nice to me so I will give them a lift home.

A couple of other people are sometimes able to give this person a lift but they usually ask me. I am not confrontational but it really riles me, how can I tell them no without looking mean in front of my other workmates?

You need to separate your work relationship with this person from the out of work, just as you would if you drank in the same pub. You might also find that a better personal relationship spills over int the working day.