Feeling Sorry For Myself

meer53

Haven't read all the replies, two things :

1 - You can never afford a baby ! Don't wait until you can
2 - I had my second baby at 43, don't recommend it ( i love her to bits) but you've plenty of time !

jaylee3

geminilady wrote: »

Children are dying of cancer,people have no homes or jobs,could go on,if you don't like your life change it,feel sorry for your husband,maybe he should not have bought the bike but one day off in three weeks and you moan because he did no housework?

There's always one on every thread! :rotfl: Someone that has to drop in that 'first world problems' type of comment.

We are all entitled to a whinge and a gripe without being put down for it, with comments trying to belittle our woes and unhappiness like THAT quoted above^^^

Georgiegirl256

geminilady wrote: »

Children are dying of cancer,people have no homes or jobs,could go on,if you don't like your life change it,feel sorry for your husband,maybe he should not have bought the bike but one day off in three weeks and you moan because he did no housework?

Was there any need for the above comment? Totally bang out of order. :cool: would you be happy putting up with what the OP has to?

OP, I have no advice as such, but just wanted to say that I hope it gets easier for you soon Hun, it really sounds like you're going through it at the moment.

geminilady

Faith177 wrote: »

Just an FYI Gemini my mum is currently battling breast cancer as we speak so I know personally how it could be a lot worst

And I haven't had a day off in 5 weeks working 8-8 Mon-Friday 8-4 Saturday at one job the 5-11 at another on Saturday then 11-9 on Sunday but I still do housework when I'm home that's why I was annoyed

Also my dad was suddenly killed at 28 leaving my mum on her own with a 5 year old and a 9 month old

None of these points were mentioned in your original post.If you had stated you had not had a day off yourself I would not have made the comment but I am not a mind reader just went by what you posted.Hope your mum wins her battle.

meritaten

I don't get the 'brother gets half the house' bit either. so if mum lives for 5, 10, 20 years YOU alone will be paying the mortgage? why didn't you buy it jointly? it seems very unfair to me. he should only be entitled to HIS half on the value of the house when you bought it.
and your husband sounds more like a lodger than an equal partner - of COURSE he should be paying half the running costs - he lives there - and in my opinion he should be paying half the mortgage too.

Hunny, you DO realise that people are walking all over you? you sound so nice, but this feeling of unhappiness could be because YOU might be in denial, and just WANT everyone to be happy, even if its at your expense (which it is). and of course they are - its a win-win situation for THEM!

OH and Faith - try telling mother-in-law next time she asks about having grandchildren 'Well we are at it like rabbits every chance we get - and five times on Sunday'. Honestly, I am a 60yr old MIL too, and find her carping on about grandkids out of order. its NONE of her business! you didn't marry her son solely for the purpose of providing her with grandchildren!

Faith177

meritaten wrote: »

I don't get the 'brother gets half the house' bit either. so if mum lives for 5, 10, 20 years YOU alone will be paying the mortgage? why didn't you buy it jointly? it seems very unfair to me. he should only be entitled to HIS half on the value of the house when you bought it.
and your husband sounds more like a lodger than an equal partner - of COURSE he should be paying half the running costs - he lives there - and in my opinion he should be paying half the mortgage too.

Hunny, you DO realise that people are walking all over you? you sound so nice, but this feeling of unhappiness could be because YOU might be in denial, and just WANT everyone to be happy.

OH and Faith - try telling mother-in-law next time she asks about having grandchildren 'Well we are at it like rabbits every chance we get - and five times on Sunday'. Honestly, I am a 60yr old MIL too, and find her carping on about grandkids out of order. its NONE of her business! you didn't marry her son solely for the purpose of providing her with grandchildren!

Thanks the mil bit made me laugh

My brother was only just 16 when I took the mortgage so it was a no go

I think I am too nice tbh I end up doing loads for other people at a detriment to myself. I will do anything for anyone but never ask for anything in return

meritaten

well at least I have given you a laugh! and that's exactly what you should do with MIL - snigger behind her back and to yourself! and yeah, say outrageous things to her when she is BANG out of order! I couldn't imagine asking my DILs when they were going to get pregnant (um, usually its way before I am expecting them to!).
hunny - it does sound a very unequal partnership - you work so many hours - at least chores should be shared! and large purchases should be agreed on jointly. (large to me being anything over £100)
and your brother should have had his 'inheritance' when you bought mum out. I realise due to his age it was complicated - but mum could have put the money in a 'trust' for him. as it stands YOU are 'growing' his inheritance at no small cost to yourself.
I am truly sorry your mum has breast cancer - a close friend of mine had a double mastectomy and has been clear for two years, and just had a reconstruction - it isn't easy to cope with. But, survival rates are high - keep positive!
I can understand why you feel down - how about 'blowing' some money on a holiday? even a long weekend somewhere cheap off season will help recharge your batteries! and after your OH's little impulse buy...............a couple of hundred on a nice break, well that's nothing isn't it? and if you are due holidays in work - tell your employer you are booking them and they HAVE to get in more staff (how the hell can you be short staffed when millions of people are out there ready and willing to work?) I never buy this 'short-staffed' !!!!!! temps are easy to come by! I should know - I only ever worked temp jobs!

nearlyrich

I promise never to make comments to my two about grandchildren, if they have children that would be lovely but not my place to question their choices ever...

jaylee3

meritaten wrote: »

I don't get the 'brother gets half the house' bit either. so if mum lives for 5, 10, 20 years YOU alone will be paying the mortgage? why didn't you buy it jointly? it seems very unfair to me. he should only be entitled to HIS half on the value of the house when you bought it.
and your husband sounds more like a lodger than an equal partner - of COURSE he should be paying half the running costs - he lives there - and in my opinion he should be paying half the mortgage too.

Hunny, you DO realise that people are walking all over you? you sound so nice, but this feeling of unhappiness could be because YOU might be in denial, and just WANT everyone to be happy, even if its at your expense (which it is). and of course they are - its a win-win situation for THEM!

OH and Faith - try telling mother-in-law next time she asks about having grandchildren 'Well we are at it like rabbits every chance we get - and five times on Sunday'. Honestly, I am a 60yr old MIL too, and find her carping on about grandkids out of order. its NONE of her business! you didn't marry her son solely for the purpose of providing her with grandchildren!

All of this. ^^^ :T

I am very sorry to hear about your mom's cancer Faith and equally as sorry to hear about your father. But I would echo a LOT of what Meritaten says above. Especially the bit I underlined.