Who knows ? In debt & suicidal, you are not alone, read on PLEASE

sourcrates

Debt is a very serious issue for lots of people, it does get you down having to put all your spare hard earned towards your debts, it doesn't help if creditors are still constantly pestering you either.
I remember when I first got into debt, debt I could not repay, I was been hounded by DCA`s day in day out, it was around that time I took advice from this forum, and others, and got a little insider information on what these people could and couldn't legally do, people choose to deal with debt in different ways, these DCA`s were not asking nicely, if you know what I mean, so I started having a bit of fun with them, as they were so serious all the time, some of the things they came out with made me laugh out loud.


1st credit were the real bad boys, and over the years I've had the pleasure of knowing most DCA`s that operate in this country, and I've noticed they all follow the same old routine.
Once you know its 99% hot air, for me, it took away the fear, I played them at there own game.
My debts were eventually settled via an IVA, but I have never myself, paid any DCA a single penny, now I would not advocate everyone followed this path, DCA`s have changed these days, they play Mr nice guy now, most of them anyway, but that was my way of dealing with it.

coinsflipside

Hi all.
I am in an IVA for 35k unsecured debts, was paying back 250pcm. from Nov last year- and still get hounded by creditors. (also have secured loan 15k and mortgage 55k on flat worth 70k).
had a crappy job p/t when I started IVA but kicked myself in to getting better job. My outgoings have shot up though- walked to work, got meals on job, had work uniform, could walk dogs during split shifts.
Now I earn more, they want half of my pay increase as they don't consider dogs as essential budget items other than 30pcm food and insurance. i pay a dog walker now.
I have lost everything. My partner, my career, my home, my friends. I only have my two dogs left. If they insist on me paying this much more, I can't afford the dogsitter, so I can't be out all day. So I either leave my new job and look for crappy p/t work over unsociable hours which plays havoc with my mental stability again or I lose my dogs.

If I lose my dogs I will kill myself. My father killed myself and I come from a long and distinguished line of mentally mis-wired people.

This is just all too much and you say there is a way, but I have tried it. I accrued debt through trying to have a business, not credit cards and holidays. I haven't had a break for years, I don't go out, don't buy presents, for god's sake- when my tooth cracked, I couldn't afford the dentists so I just pulled it out myself.

I took myself off with my debt spreadhseet, entered in to an IVA, got a better paid job, and now it has all fallen down again.

I don't drink, don't smoke, don't go out, pay a token rent that includes utilities- I have asked that they put the dog walker's fees in where I would usually be paying any of those things. It turns out it is ok for me to spend the extra, as long as it's on booze, fags and a sky subscription.

How can you say there is always a way out, when it just leads to another slamming door?

Sazzie23

coinsflipside wrote: »

Hi all.
I am in an IVA for 35k unsecured debts, was paying back 250pcm. from Nov last year- and still get hounded by creditors. (also have secured loan 15k and mortgage 55k on flat worth 70k).
had a crappy job p/t when I started IVA but kicked myself in to getting better job. My outgoings have shot up though- walked to work, got meals on job, had work uniform, could walk dogs during split shifts.
Now I earn more, they want half of my pay increase as they don't consider dogs as essential budget items other than 30pcm food and insurance. i pay a dog walker now.
I have lost everything. My partner, my career, my home, my friends. I only have my two dogs left. If they insist on me paying this much more, I can't afford the dogsitter, so I can't be out all day. So I either leave my new job and look for crappy p/t work over unsociable hours which plays havoc with my mental stability again or I lose my dogs.

If I lose my dogs I will kill myself. My father killed myself and I come from a long and distinguished line of mentally mis-wired people.

This is just all too much and you say there is a way, but I have tried it. I accrued debt through trying to have a business, not credit cards and holidays. I haven't had a break for years, I don't go out, don't buy presents, for god's sake- when my tooth cracked, I couldn't afford the dentists so I just pulled it out myself.

I took myself off with my debt spreadhseet, entered in to an IVA, got a better paid job, and now it has all fallen down again.

I don't drink, don't smoke, don't go out, pay a token rent that includes utilities- I have asked that they put the dog walker's fees in where I would usually be paying any of those things. It turns out it is ok for me to spend the extra, as long as it's on booze, fags and a sky subscription.

How can you say there is always a way out, when it just leads to another slamming door?

Hi coinflipside

I'm not upto date on IVA and their intricacies, but I see as a newbie poster you haven't put this up as a board question. Why not give it a try and see what suggestions the knowledgeable folk here have, you owe it to yourself and your dogs.

I'm also going to go back to my first point, which is, if you feel suicidal, call the Samaritans and when you've done that call stepchange, and if there is still no way out come back here and we will try to make suggestions.

FYI I understand how you feel about your dogs, I'm not going to get into my situation is worse than yours type of post because there is nothing to be gained, but don't think I'm doing this because I think life is easy.

sourcrates

coinsflipside wrote: »

It turns out it is ok for me to spend the extra, as long as it's on booze, fags and a sky subscription.

How can you say there is always a way out, when it just leads to another slamming door?

Then tell them you have a sky subscription, your an alcoholic, and you have a 40 a day tobacco habit, then put that money towards your dog walker, its all about doing your income/expenditure "correctly", if you know what I mean !!!;)

whitewing

sourcrates wrote: »

Then tell them you have a sky subscription, your an alcoholic, and you have a 40 a day tobacco habit, then put that money towards your dog walker, its all about doing your income/expenditure "correctly", if you know what I mean !!!;)[/QUOTE

Yes, rename your dogs Sky and Whisky

Buffythedebtslayer

Sazzie23 wrote: »

Thanks folks

I've decided I will keep trying to adding to this thread to try to keep it on the front pages.

The thought of someone being so miserable they commit suicide over money when there is help fills me with sadness.

You are fabulous for doing this thread.


If you are reading this and you think life isn't worth living, please remember, many many people are in your position. IT CAN BE DONE.



They cannot take what you do not have.


XX

Sazzie23

Shame coinflipside hasn't been back, hope he/she is ok.

Still onward for more hopeful posts.

coinsflipside

Hi,
Thanks for your suggestions. I have submitted an honest budget. Surely it would be questioned if I suddenly changed it to have no dogs but fag, booze and Sky subscriptions? They know I don't even have a television.
I am no good at lying to people about stuff like this, and the excess still wouldn't cover paying someone to walk my dogs 2-3 times per week. A friend has offered to walk them 2-3 times per week too but for free.
I just can't lift the despair. There isn't a way out. I just sit there with regrets running round and round and round.
I am worn out now, there isn't enough of me left to deal with this. Thank you though. I don't know why I commented really, I am not really adding much to this thread. Sorry.

Sazzie23

coinsflipside wrote: »

Hi,
Thanks for your suggestions. I have submitted an honest budget. Surely it would be questioned if I suddenly changed it to have no dogs but fag, booze and Sky subscriptions? They know I don't even have a television.
I am no good at lying to people about stuff like this, and the excess still wouldn't cover paying someone to walk my dogs 2-3 times per week. A friend has offered to walk them 2-3 times per week too but for free.
I just can't lift the despair. There isn't a way out. I just sit there with regrets running round and round and round.
I am worn out now, there isn't enough of me left to deal with this. Thank you though. I don't know why I commented really, I am not really adding much to this thread. Sorry.

Hi coin

Welcome back, yeah I have do the honest thing too, and although it leaves me at a disadvantage at times, I know that when questioned I have told the truth and that is important to me. It also means that people will ask me stuff when they need an honest answer. You are lucky to have friends who will volunteer to walk the dogs, even if that doesn't work out it means you have someone who cares enough about you to try to help. Using them as a temp solution might give you enough respite to find another answer.

I can't have a dog at the moment, but I'd love to have one to take a walk now and again, I'm worry that I can't commit enough for someone to take me seriously so I've never taken it further.

Have you been to the doc, tried the Samaritans? I know that won't help with your problem but might help you have the strength to find that elusive solution.

Sazzie23

I'm definitely not the right person to give you any debt advice, although I know about DMPs from experience, everything else is a bit of an unknown. But as I'm not known for giving up easy, I thought I'd research a little and one of the posters in an IVA thread recommended this site.

http://debtcamel.co.uk/hard-choices/iva-vs-bankrutcy/

So I had a look, i thought it was interesting how they seem to say doing the IVA is the hard way, it certainly is for you at the moment. I'm still reading to learn more about IVAs.