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Would you invest in a relationship where yr partner refused to pay for meals outside
Comments
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He's very nice and loving (he has told me he loves me :eek:)... but our lifestyles clash.I care about him very much, but not at the expense of things that give me joy in life. It's so sad to be around someone who doesn't really care about eating nice food and travelling to nice places. I feel restricted to do only what he is okay with unless I pay for him.
Look - that's the way he CHOOSES to live his life.
Accept it or move on.
No need for a long thread debating anything as it really is that simple.:hello:0 -
He says he doesn't like working and only when he has to, will he work again.
See, that's a statement that would worry me. What kind of future could you have with someone who thinks like that, if already you want different things? Sounds to me like someone who would bitterly resent having to do anything he doesn't want to do, which is just going to restrict you both. If it's a problem now with meals out and trips to the theatre then it's going to be an even bigger problem when it comes to really big lifestyle choices like having a child or buying a home together. You'd just end up resenting each other - him because he'd feel you were forcing him to do stuff, and you because you'll feel restricted and taken advantage of.0 -
He needs to find a partner with a similar budget, lifestyle, ethics and the time and stamina to walk 5 miles to save a £2 bus fare.
Is he really reluctant to work or is he undergoing social withdrawal because of mental illness, such as anxiety or depression or similar?
Someone that stingy would rather take a cleaning job than eat into their savings. The rents in even the cheapest part of London, including the south-east, will soon erode any savings.
Oh, wait - does he live at home?!0 -
If he likes saving Money- then introduce him to MSE and you can then both trawl the voucher off threads for 2 for 1 deals!
He walks everywhere to save money, he doesn't want to pay for over-priced restaurant food and he won't spend more than a fiver on a day out?
Sounds like a perfect [STRIKE]tightwad [/STRIKE] MSEer!
Seriously though, I couldn't date someone who didn't work by choice. I know people who are wealthy enough not to work, they spend their days smoking dope and perusing conspiracy theories about the BBC and pharmaceutical companies on the interwebs. Sounds like fun...not!"I may be many things but not being indiscreet isn't one of them"0 -
He needs to find a partner with a similar budget, lifestyle, ethics and the time and stamina to walk 5 miles to save a £2 bus fare.
Is he really reluctant to work or is he undergoing social withdrawal because of mental illness, such as anxiety or depression or similar?
Someone that stingy would rather take a cleaning job than eat into their savings. The rents in even the cheapest part of London, including the south-east, will soon erode any savings.
Oh, wait - does he live at home?!
He does live at home. Bingo! Ha... I don't know if he is depressed, he seems introverted. I don't know if it's because he's feeling down.0 -
He says he doesn't like working and only when he has to, will he work again.
Many people don't like working. That doesn't mean they are workshy. There's a difference.
You need to get shot of him asap before you get even more emotionally involved.
So he told you he loved you and is "nice" to you. That doesn't really mean anything unless you share the same life goals and values, which you obviously don't.0 -
Get rid of him.0
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Over the internet and we got close quite quickly. I just don't think it works very well in real life.He's very nice and loving (he has told me he loves me :eek:)... but our lifestyles clash.
So its the sex that got you in.
Stop doing that and start doing what you want without him if he won't join in.0 -
It's not that dating sites don't work , its that you chose someone just because he is nice to you and tells you he loves you. Look at your confidence , your selection criteria are appallingThe word "dilemma" comes from Greek where "di" means two and "lemma" means premise. Refers usually to difficult choice between two undesirable options.
Often people seem to use this word mistakenly where "quandary" would fit better.0
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