Sharing/conflict resolution at nursery school?

mountainofdebt

notanewuser wrote: »

What has that got to do with anything?

Nothing in the context of the original posting about schools and encouraging sharing - though I guess english (as in speaking it) in a welsh medium school is as contraversial as religion in schools

iammumtoone

notanewuser wrote: »

As I say, the majority of the 3 year olds aren't fluent in welsh yet. They wouldn't know what they were agreeing to!!

Will the prayers/sermon be spoken in Welsh? If so as much as I agree with you it might be better to let it go (you have to pick your battles) if it just means your daughter sitting in on a lesson(s) which she can't understand and by the time she is at an age she has learnt enough Welsh to follow it you will be able to opt out.

iammumtoone

I asked my ds if he prayed at school he said yes :eek: but not every assembly. I have no issue with this as it is not every day, I am however embarrassed and ashamed that I did not know about it.

I explained to him that unlike when we go to church where he has to say Amen as he chose to go to church therefore we follow the rules, at school he has no choice he has to go to assembly therefore he does not have to say Amen if he doesn't want to. He replied that he still would as everyone else does, at six I didn't expect him to say anything else.

Anacrusis

Hi Notanewuser,

If there isn't another nursey school, another option could be sending your daughter to a childminder. In England you can get up to 15 hours of funded childcare in an ofsted registerred setting until a child either goes to school, or the term after their 5th birthday. I don't know whether that's for the whole of the UK though or just England - maybe someone else knows? If not I can ask on the childminding forum (I'm a childminder).

I wonder if some settings might not understand that when children's needs are met and they've built positive relationships with each other, they generally want to see their friends happy. I look after 3-5 kids so much less than a school, but I've lost count of the amount of times I've thought a child is going to have to wait ages for a toy only to find the child who already has it, was really involved with it and who has only just said "when I've finished" - just hands it over!

If there's a really really popular toy that everyone is always waiting for, I'd get some more, so there's enough for everyone.

The religion sounds a bit much. My school was the same though, and when my kids went to school (about 8 years ago) it was the same then too. They had my 5yo daughter copy out passages from the bible! And of two local schools, this wasn't the religious one lol.

iammumtoone

Anacrusis wrote: »

If there's a really really popular toy that everyone is always waiting for, I'd get some more, so there's enough for everyone.

Do you then find that no one wants to play with it once you have done that :rotfl:

Nicki

The local imam and rabbi certainly visited my DS's school as well as the local vicar but we do live in a very multicultural area. If there isn't an imam or other faith leader reasonably close by to a small welsh village school I could understand if this doesn't happen there.

I am baffled though as to why, just because a child comes from a family who believe there is no God, that the family object to their child being exposed to what others believe and how Christian rituals work, when they are being told at home that God is a "sky fairy" and there is no truth in it. Surely knowing these things is part of a good all round education.

NANU clearly has no aspirations for her child to assimilate in a world where a knowledge of what Christianity is about is an advantage, even if a religious belief is optional. She doesn't expect her child to go to an Oxbridge university (where grace is said before formal meals and the students are expected to know how to behave) to be able to attend a wedding or funeral service of colleagues when in the working world and know instinctively when to stand up, sit down and the normal responses to things, or even to appreciate a huge swathe of literature from various cultures and be able to identify which ones are based on (or are satirising) canons of Christianity or are using the rhythms of that language, which can in its own right be very beautiful even without a faith. Leaving aside the music. Don't let her be exposed to Handel's Messiah whatever you do!

For a family who believes so strongly it doesn't exist, they are mighty frightened of letting their child be exposed to it, to the extent they would rather she had half an education!

Mojisola

Nicki wrote: »

For a family who believes so strongly it doesn't exist, they are mighty frightened of letting their child be exposed to it, to the extent they would rather she had half an education!

There's a big difference between being taught about all religions (which is necessary to understand history) and being expected to participate in one religion's prayers and services.

I would expect any school to educate children about all the main religions of the world but it should be their choice (at an age when they can make a decision for themselves) as to whether they want to join any of them.

notanewuser

Nicki wrote: »

The local imam and rabbi certainly visited my DS's school as well as the local vicar but we do live in a very multicultural area. If there isn't an imam or other faith leader reasonably close by to a small welsh village school I could understand if this doesn't happen there.

We're all of 10 miles from Cardiff. I'm not aware of any scriptures banning travel.

Nicki wrote: »

I am baffled though as to why, just because a child comes from a family who believe there is no God, that the family object to their child being exposed to what others believe and how Christian rituals work, when they are being told at home that God is a "sky fairy" and there is no truth in it. Surely knowing these things is part of a good all round education.

We don't. We are happy with religious EDUCATION, but not INDOCTRINATION into one specific religion not of DD's choosing! Is that really so hard for an experienced lawyer to understand?

Nicki wrote: »

NANU clearly has no aspirations for her child to assimilate in a world where a knowledge of what Christianity is about is an advantage, even if a religious belief is optional. She doesn't expect her child to go to an Oxbridge university (where grace is said before formal meals and the students are expected to know how to behave)

So non-christian children cant behave? DD is 3. She has plenty of time to decide what she believes and whether or not she wants to go to any university, never mind an oxbridge one!

Nicki wrote: »

be able to attend a wedding or funeral service of colleagues when in the working world and know instinctively when to stand up, sit down and the normal responses to things, or even to appreciate a huge swathe of literature from various cultures and be able to identify which ones are based on (or are satirising) canons of Christianity or are using the rhythms of that language, which can in its own right be very beautiful even without a faith.

She attended church for the first time aged 6 months when her (very religious) great grandmother died. I daresay she'll be exposed through things like that during her life time. I'm not sure how you think saying prayers at school is going to teach her anything about church funerals though! (Incidentally, one half of the family is jewish, so her outside school experiences will be broader than the school ones will.)

Nicki wrote: »

For a family who believes so strongly it doesn't exist, they are mighty frightened of letting their child be exposed to it, to the extent they would rather she had half an education!

Happy for her to be exposed to all religions, via RE, not via prayers to a deity of the school/government's choice.

Nicki wrote: »

Did anyone else wonder whether this thread was deliberately started on a Sunday to be inflammatory to some other posters by the way?

:huh: It was started on a Monday.

notanewuser

Anacrusis wrote: »

Hi Notanewuser,

If there isn't another nursey school, another option could be sending your daughter to a childminder. In England you can get up to 15 hours of funded childcare in an ofsted registerred setting until a child either goes to school, or the term after their 5th birthday. I don't know whether that's for the whole of the UK though or just England - maybe someone else knows? If not I can ask on the childminding forum (I'm a childminder).

I wonder if some settings might not understand that when children's needs are met and they've built positive relationships with each other, they generally want to see their friends happy. I look after 3-5 kids so much less than a school, but I've lost count of the amount of times I've thought a child is going to have to wait ages for a toy only to find the child who already has it, was really involved with it and who has only just said "when I've finished" - just hands it over!

If there's a really really popular toy that everyone is always waiting for, I'd get some more, so there's enough for everyone.

The religion sounds a bit much. My school was the same though, and when my kids went to school (about 8 years ago) it was the same then too. They had my 5yo daughter copy out passages from the bible! And of two local schools, this wasn't the religious one lol.

Nope. Here it's 10 hours at age 3. If they're offered a school nursery place at 3 then there's no option for other funding.

Nicki

Mojisola wrote: »

I would expect any school to educate children about all the main religions of the world but it should be their choice (at an age when they can make a decision for themselves) as to whether they want to join any of them.

As the head has already said she doesn't have to attend daily assemblies I can't see where she is being "forced to participate". The nursery says grace before lunch and a prayer at the end of the day. Again she can be present for these without having to participate (particularly if the parents have made it known she isn't to be asked to take any active part)