Just needed to be heard for a little while

Waves_and_Smiles

Don't blame yourself for that elsien. Before the first psychotic break it is very hard to realise what is happening to someone as they don't consider themselves to be ill and symptoms aren't obvious at that point so their behaviour just looks terrible without cause. I was psychotic for a year before my total break and I did a lot that I am very ashamed of during that time. I had no idea that I was ill so acted on impulse, to everyone else I probably looked very mean at times.

Drugs can trigger psychosis if you already have a chemical leaning towards it. No one quite knows what causes the brain to become prone to it in the first place but a predilection alone won't cause it to fully develop. There is always another trigger involved in it developing be it social, environmental or in your cousins case drugs.

Oops, just saw that the poor man died, quite edit! I hope that your cousin got some of the help the he needed and was able to begin to build bridges with those he hurt.

elsien

Unfortunately he committed suicide in his late twenties while in hospital. Such a waste of a life and we all have a lot of regrets about what we could have done differently.

whitewing

It is an honour to him that you are able to join in this thread.

I think also first and foremost when dealing with someone in the family who has mental illness (which may be undiagnosed) is that you can't help someone as effectively if you are not taking care of your own health and wellbeing. It's a very fine line between supporting and enabling.

If nothing else, one of our Thread Friends may be inspired to train to work in mental health and you and your cousin will now have played a part in that decision for the future.

Ps WaS, you are in no way responsible for anyone's death.

Waves_and_Smiles

I am a clincal psychologist, for all the good it did me as I was only able to work for a short time. I am glad that I took the degree though, it makes me proud that I achieved something that I had always wanted to do and it helped me so much once I was diagnosed. Instead of being terrified I knew what was happening to me and what I needed to do to improve my life, things would have been an awful lot worse for me if I hadn't had the knowledge about what was going on.

You could always take a degree now? Or some psychology courses? It is never too late!

elsien

Sorry WaS if this triggers anything for you. Are there any topics that are better not being discussed?

I did the psychology degree, it was the post grad I couldn't get into. I now work with people with learning disabilities instead, so mental health does crop up from time to time and I still feel I'm doing something useful.

Waves_and_Smiles

I am so sorry that poor man died so young. The suicide rate is very high amongst schizophrenics, you rarely find someone with the illness in old age. I have tried myself on 8 occasions, the main reason is it is so tiring. You have to second guess your every thought and behaviour and your life becomes so limited. Also you have the drain of the voices constantly telling you that you do not deserve to be alive, it is just very exhausting.

I am glad that you told me about your cousin, now I will remember him which is what he deserves.

Don't worry about triggers, there is almost nothing. My first psychotic break is very difficult to discuss as I carry so much guilt and shame. Also any deaths happening in the here and now tend to be difficult as I have a habit of blaming myself that people have died even if I have never met them. However, talking about your dear cousin is fine as that was in the past so I don't feel responsible for that one. Even if I am triggered I can usually rationalise it and acknowledge that the trigger isn't real.

So don't worry about being careful, I want everyone to be able to say what they wish too, I am tougher than I look!

That is an excellent field elsien! My main job was working as a manager in a residential home for adults with severe learning difficulties and/or challenging behaviours. So we had a mix of learning difficulties and mental illness, sometimes both. I absolutely loved it!

Waves_and_Smiles

I just told my partner about the mean bus woman! He is now regaling me with tales about the misfortune of being a man and the accidents that can happen when trying to aim and not dribble afterwards! It went fine! Thank you so, so much for giving me the courage to do it.

elsien

Well done you for managing it. Although if it means an afternoon of hearing about man pee you may wish you'd kept schtum after all!

Waves_and_Smiles

I was just thinking that elsien! We have already strayed far past the TMI border. Someone save me from the complete history of man pee!

(We are now onto his friends accidents with man pee. Make it stop!)

DUKE

I too love the sari!

I've been trying to calm H but I ain't doing too good & I feel bad about it. WaS would you advise to call the crisis team? Ovbiously I wouldn't call them if he didn't want me to. I've got the family saying no he has his appointment next week & he must wait & see what happens, but on the other hand he's suffering unnecessarily.