Come Fly With Me

MadamMim2013

pigpen wrote: »

I'll be about too.. I'm having a text argument with KH.. apparently at 13 DD3's views about going to his or not should not be taken into account and I should FORCE her to go against her will if necessary.. er.. no!! .. As far as I am concerned she can go to his whenever she wants so long as I know where she is that is ok by me.. he only wants them when they fit in his social life.. so now I am being threatened with solicitors (who would also take into account her feelings on the matter) and it has been twisted into a tirade of abuse against DS2 Sometimes I really hate him... it seems so unfair that the men who would love and cherish their children are taken away and the ones who emotionally abuse theirs stick around to cause as much heartache as possible for all concerned..

It's awful isn't it when they just can't see that their children have an opinion too! My boys are 10 & (nearly) 14, they recently asked not to go to their fathers anymore. He was always shouting & doesn't actually do anything with them or even talk to them most of the time they are at his house his gf (who is lovely) entertains them!!!!
Since moving house they've not visited him & the txt msgs to me are getting more & more abusive.
Baring in mind he only wants them for 7 hours once a fortnight & never contacts them in any way in between!!
He is now claiming to miss them yet as soon as he speaks about our youngest he immediately belittles him & is rude etc.
Yesterday I lost the plot & told him exactly what was what, that being they don't want to visit as well as I would not be forcing them & why too! His eldest child (19.. not mine) has pretty much nothing to do with him for the reason he's so unpleasant!
It's all gone quiet... only time will tell.
I am devastated that he is such an idiot.. I wanted so much better for my boys than I had
Sorry for the moan

lynnejk

MadamMim2013 wrote: »

It's awful isn't it when they just can't see that their children have an opinion too! My boys are 10 & (nearly) 14, they recently asked not to go to their fathers anymore. He was always shouting & doesn't actually do anything with them or even talk to them most of the time they are at his house his gf (who is lovely) entertains them!!!!
Since moving house they've not visited him & the txt msgs to me are getting more & more abusive.
Baring in mind he only wants them for 7 hours once a fortnight & never contacts them in any way in between!!
He is now claiming to miss them yet as soon as he speaks about our youngest he immediately belittles him & is rude etc.
Yesterday I lost the plot & told him exactly what was what, that being they don't want to visit as well as I would not be forcing them & why too! His eldest child (19.. not mine) has pretty much nothing to do with him for the reason he's so unpleasant!
It's all gone quiet... only time will tell.
I am devastated that he is such an idiot.. I wanted so much better for my boys than I had
Sorry for the moan

Sounds like it was about time you told a few home truths and they probably hurt a bit.


You can't blame yourself for someone else's short-comings, especially when they are meant to be an adult themselves.


Sounds like your boys have realised they have an opinion of their own and thank goodness for that. I had the same problem with mine and my ex and it all sorted out in the end.


I wouldn't worry about it anymore and enjoy the company of your boys while they are still at home with you. At their ages they will soon be off with their own lives to sort and be able to thank you for all the support you gave them whilst young.


Sit down, put your feet up and enjoy the weekend. I'm having a glass of wine if you fancy joining me. Cheers !!
Lx

dancemum

Hugs Bossymoo x

Strawberries, merringue and vanilla yoghurt eaten x

Wudupa

pigpen

Bossy.. I am sad your day was not as peaceful as you hoped.. I wish something I could say or do would make it easier for you but I know that isn't possible.. You are allowed to be pee'd off by the lack of acknowledgement from your family, though dad and brother being men probably didn't know what to say so said nothing and your mum may have been trying to open a door for you to contact her.. or maybe I know nothing, but I know that I wouldn't ring, I would text so that you knew I was thinking of you but I wouldn't call in case I was intruding I would hope a daughter of mine would know I was there whenever and for whatever they needed. Enjoy your Pimms and I hope you get a peaceful night.. They are only little, they don't understand why today was special for you, don't be cross with them.. xxx

MadamMim .. Their dad is the same verbally and emotionally abusive and has been physically abusive on occasion.. but less often now than it was before. He seems ok with the 2 youngest at the moment but as soon as they start forming their own opinions an developing a social life he will start with them. He doesn't let them go to friends birthday parties that are on 'his' weekends.. he doesn't realise they are also their weekends!

I should really get my knitting out.. I am so lazy! Must finish it soon I have tiny baby stuff to start!

Valli

Bother - I wote a reply and forgot to 'post' it - anyway, Bossy Piggers has said what I was thinking only better. Hugs to both you and Froddy.

The people you love are forever young, and forever yours, in your hearts

x

Kaz2904

Bossy, I'm so sorry that today was not as you had hoped. Piggers summed it up well I think. As your babies get older, they will become more sensitive to you.
I am also on the Aldi pimms! It's very nice with lots of lemonade. .
Lots to do tomorrow in for the BBQ

Honey_Bear

bossymoo wrote: »

How's this for a poem.

Here is a small meal ticket
We couldn't be looked after better
So we thought we'd treat you also
To dinner at the Olive & Feta!

It's perfect, and the fact that you put so much thought into it will mean a lot to them.

bossymoo wrote: »

7yrs ago today that Daddy and I got married. Pimms it is. Alone

Happy anniversary, Bossy. That sounds wrong, but I hope you know what I mean. I'm so sorry the kiddiewinks played you up today and that Flylady company makes it a slightly less 'alone' experience. (((Hugs)))

(((Hug))) for you too, Frodders.

just_the_two_of_us

Sounds like everyone needs hugs - flying your way to catch them if you need them.

Piggers always puts things so beautifully there is no need to say more, just agree with her totally.

Up early as couldn't sleep - so breakfasted already and waiting for DH to get up!! Not sure what the weather is going to do - it was warm but very overcast yesterday and today should rain!!! So may not get out in the garden much this weekend although my inside tidying/ re-organising cupboards is coming on quite well.

Plan for today:
Advertise items for sale in local free ads.
More paper frog eating!!!!
Washing x 1

Declutter some recordings/ read my book.

Have a good day everyone xx
Dust and hoover through

bossymoo

Thanks again ladies :A

I'm not cross with them piggers but on the other hand they need to learn there are consequences to their behaviour. As such, today is a "no treat day" with the promise of normal service being resumed tomorrow if they can rein it in a bit

As such they are currently in DD room playing, with the suggestion that if they start feeling cross with one another, DS goes to his own room for some time apart.

Today, I'm going to tidy my knicker drawer. :rotfl:
Also going to tidy / plant out the front, weeding is required.
Followed by some ironing and then tidying of garage.
If I can be arrissed, I will sort some paperwork tonight.

Rock n roll!

Dustykitten

Morning all

Bossy wishing you a harmonious day today sweetie, yesterday was another milestone we all wish you did not have to mark but it has passed.

Froddy big hugs sweetie, it sounds like you really miss your brother x

I'm the only one up, mogs fed, just going to finish feeding the WM and get that set. DW emptied.

Online banking first, then shower and back to the garage sort, gee life is so exciting somedays.