Nice People Thread Number 11 - A Treasury of Nice People

Nikkster

lostinrates wrote: »

Oh wow , your garden looks gorgeous!

I want a patio, I do, I do!


( and I might have one soon).

If I do you'll all get a pic.


Edit: what's the glass(?) thing down by the shed?

It only looks so nice because the shadows in the background hide are hiding the overgrown bits that haven't been touched yet

And the daisies and hint of sunshine make everything look better!

Its not glass - it's plastic. That's the plastic cloche thing that has been over my precious plantlets. Thought I'd let them experience a bit of the breeze whilst I'm out this evening, before I tuck them away again (just moved it out of the way slightly). Hopefully it'll shelter them enough from the forecast storms. They seem to be doing ok so far outside (crosses fingers). Though I think I might have to spread them out a bit.

lostinrates

Oh! It looks like garden sculpture in the pic!! Like a huge pair of Kilner jars. Oops.

Nikkster

lostinrates wrote: »

Oh! It looks like garden sculpture in the pic!! Like a huge pair of Kilner jars. Oops.

I can see what you mean

Here is a pic of the bit behind the garage (just to the left of the previous view down the garden:


I've been gradually mowing a little further into the weeds each time. I keep telling myself that Belfast sink needs rescuing!

lostinrates

It does, Be ace for mint? I could probably send you some mint in a baggy in the post? Better when its cooler .


Lovely strong good looking fences. That's good. What is the tree? Cannot see from pic.

Nikkster

lostinrates wrote: »

It does, Be ace for mint? I could probably send you some mint in a baggy in the post? Better when its cooler .


Lovely strong good looking fences. That's good. What is the tree? Cannot see from pic.

Please don't send me mint - I have loads growing all over the garden! That and something looks like mint but smells like citronella?

Apparently those are my fences

I only know as much as it's a tree
Last weekend my mum said she thought it might be elder as it's in flower and looks like elderflower...

Edit: just googled it - I don't think it's elder

neverdespairgirl

LydiaJ wrote: »

:j:j:j:beer::beer::beer::T:T:T:dance::dance::dance:_party__party__party_

Well done Yorkie!

I was in the pool, a long long time ago as a student. I caught a promising fish whose massive hidden flaws I didn't discover until later. Now there is no pool anywhere near my normal life, but maybe there are ways of finding the pool (online????) when I have enough energy to make the effort.

/\ /\/\

This, Yorkie! Must be a lovely feeling, to be appreciated.

I don't think I ever entered a pool. I assumed as a mid to late teenager that I wouldn't ever be in a serious or long-term relationship but would, instead, be career-focused, perhaps a bit like Jane Tennison in the 1990s films Prime Suspect. Didn't quite work out like that, though.

I think relationships are much easier to start, though, whether you are in a pool or not, while you are in the Sixth Form, or at uni, or just started work. It gets harder, I think?

ukmaggie45 wrote: »

I'm all behind on the thread, but I took some photos of our front garden for Generali so he can have some idea of what I am looking at when I send the Vibes.

Your garden looks wonderful - cheerful, bee-friendly, and a happy place to be!

Generali wrote: »

The violently bit was a joke. I hate camping though. I like warm showers and nice carpets. Oh and decent food. Why is it campists eat so appallingly?

I don't particularly camp for fun, but I'm prepared to do it if there's no other alternative and a place I do really want to spend time in.

I don't do winter camping / ice camping / etc. OH enjoys it, I see it as torture.

Generali wrote: »

It does sometimes feel like I'm kinda going through this alone in RL. Not quite alone but nearly.

I hope a little bit of virtual support has helped.

neverdespairgirl

Nikkster wrote: »

Please don't send me mint - I have loads growing all over the garden! That and something looks like mint but smells like citronella?

Lemon balm, possibly?

Lovely stuff, but it'll take over if you let it, I think.

Your garden's HUGE!

Nikkster

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

Lemon balm, possibly?

Lovely stuff, but it'll take over if you let it, I think.

Your garden's HUGE!

All the other houses I went to look around had courtyard gardens (if that) - they were all terraces. Not sure what went wrong

Whatever the lemony thing is it's definitely already made good progress in it's quest to conquer the garden (same with the mint, and the brambles and the bindweed). I'll beat them all in the end.

Just had a proper look at the tree, and yes - as my mum said - I think it's an Elder.

LydiaJ

lostinrates wrote: »

I don't feel this. I could do what I do alone. I don't feel I am, DH is there. I can outsource a lot to him. MRI scans and med taking nope, but support, hand holding, and using the on days my head/ ears / pain make it unbearable yes.

I want for it not to have happened at all. But nothing can change that. I cannot give it to DH, or anyone else, but I can consider coping strategies or advice.

Edit: the only other thing I'd add, is that I cannot imagine this kind of acute thing and when cancer is mentioned the shadow casts long even if the illness doesn't. The nearest I can think of is when I first got told things or when new things go wrong, how I feel. Its horrid , terrifying, even broken, I like my stasis!

Aiui mrs gen has felt bad intermittently or chronically for a long time. Maybe less knife edge but potentially as 'mortally'. She'll probably know your fear in a way having felt emotionally vulnerable and probably feel some self dislike about having felt it and not suffered how you have. Dunno.

There is no comparison, but my guess is you've probably never seen the world as each other does so clearly as you do now. Shrug. Scary place.

I am so glad that you don't feel alone.
But ... you have fir. Most people do not have a fir. They have nobody closer than siblings who all have their own lives and responsibilities (like PN) or they have sombody close who loves them but who's already overwhelmed with their own struggles and doesn't have many spare spoons to share (like Gen), or people who are close and love them but are children or very old or disabled or whatever... etc.

I suppose what I mean is that it's not surprising that you don't feel as alone as PN does - because you aren't as alone as PN is.

lostinrates wrote: »

It must be terrifying, because you both need the other to be strong right now. And knowing she feels not strong doesn't directly help you, but knowing you are loved is very different to knowing you aren't. IMO.

Yes, knowing you are loved is different from knowing that you aren't. But when you are in a hard place, knowing you are loved by someone who can take turns helping you when you are down and being helped by you when they are down is quite different from only being loved by those whose need to receive help from you is clearly going to exceed their capability to give help to you for the foreseeable future. You still have the feeling of "the buck stops with me" that truly alone people have.

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

I think relationships are much easier to start, though, whether you are in a pool or not, while you are in the Sixth Form, or at uni, or just started work. It gets harder, I think?

Yes, much.

At uni, if you just get on with your usual life, and go to your usual places and do your usual things, you are surrounded by lots of single people of about your own age & stage of life. When you are older, you aren't.

LydiaJ

PasturesNew wrote: »

Don't quote, will delete....

Would the care home know whether or not she had received any calls at all in the last few days? Because if she hadn't, that would save you a lot of effort checking further afield.