Depression Support Thread

Horasio

Miss_tbc wrote: »

hello

I am on this thread in a different name normally but due to this situation i am in i have a new name.

I have been woken up to the fact that for 20 odd years of marriage that much of this has been controlled by my husband and i didnt see it (put him on a peddal stool thought he was there for me).

It recently came to a head when we had an arguement about an issue recently and everything clicked into place after getting a professional opinion i am now certain this has been going on for as long as i can remember and not realised it has been contributing towards my illness (causing panic attacks, anxiety etc) the thing is i have been desperately seeking his support and he has been saying im paranoid about situations and acts in denial when i have questioned his motives) i am devestated as i had felt he was my rock and i have had many problems to face and a lot of problems in childhood to overcome which after councelling recognised my upbringing involved emotitional deprevation and i had to come to terms with this and have no family support because of this (basically) the circumstances were they were neglecting my emotional needs and couldnt see what they had done now im in the same situation in my marriage im devestated.

Why oh why is this happening to me and do you know what the irony of it all is i am the most caring person you could wish to meet, i have been advised to get some support and help on this matter but so many things click into place as to what has been going on and when i question him as to why he doesent support me he is quick to come back and say if you dont want to stay in this marriage then thats fine by me..

OMG that sounds like me when things don't go right between us, and no it isn't me incognito!

Had a big shock today. We were talking about leaving here around April time before now. Our lease runs out at the end of February but can stay till the end of March but no longer. They want to sell to friends, we don't want to buy the place but feel scared. My OH isn't happy in his job, so with the having to leave here, we need to think where next? Together or not? I feel very frightened and excited. I don't know where to go next. I guess after not being able to do something for so long, then being able is scary.

meyore

razorbladekisses wrote: »

Well I went to see my GP today. He asked if I was still self-harming. I said yes and he said OK I'll write to your psychiatrist and team. I agreed. He asked if it was building up to something i.e trying to kill myself but I said I wouldn't attempt to kill myself by cutting. That's basically all he said. I feel like it was such a waste of time. He did ask me if there is anything he could do and tbh I don't know what he can do. He just seems at a loss as to what to do with me. He asked me to go back and see him next week for a chat but I'm not sure I'll go. I just don't see the point.

Hey razorbladekisses. Sorry you're having such a hard time at the moment and your doctor isn't being very helpful. Hope things get easier and I'm here if you need me.

Xx

meyore

rose07 wrote: »

My day at work just went on and on today, I was wondering if the time would ever pass by. And i swear im the only one that does anything :rotfl:

But then i went to the gym , i went on the cross trainer for 30 mins, then on the rowing machine i did 2000 metres, and then i went on the cycling, and did a fitness test, you do 5 mins of cycling on a certain level and then ya get a fitness score and a catergory. I did level 10, which is like going up a kinda hill, so i did it and got my fitness score and then got my catergory, guess what i got .......elite :D:D come on!!!!

oh meyore, do you know of any exercises i can do with a yoga mat? just i need some exercises to tone me tummy, do ya know any? any help much appreciated

I tell ya its a good way of feelin good, ive been feelin really up and down, with lots going on, but exercise really does help

Ive got my gp appntment tomorrow :eek::eek:, and im not sure quite what to say, but think i should tell him bout the psych. Did i tell yas she even told me i should act more my age!!! !!!!!! does that mean? she said i act older than i am, and that i should do something people my age do, like surfing, or something, i mean omg, what does she want me to do? Maybe i will do a dance on her table next time i see her, :mad::mad:

right im off to have a shower, and get ready for tomorrow day at work

hope your all ok
xxx

Hi Rose, how are you feeling? Can I ask how old you actually are? You don't have to answer if you think I'm being rude. I can't see how the psychiatrist can say you aren't acting your age etc-isn't that very unprofessional. I'm 24 and I don't go out and do any of those things-does that mean theres something wrong with the way I behave too! I think you're right and you should tell your GP.

With the floor mat exercises all I really do is sit ups and cycling(do you know what I mean, peddling with your legs up in the air!?) Also you can do the plank, which is good for tightening up all your back and stomach muscles. You lie on your front, then bring yourself up onto your toes and elbows and try and hold for 30 seconds. You have to keep your body flat with it-no bum in the air. I'm unsure how much sense this makes...

I have one of those giant inflatable balls-they're brilliant for sit ups and tummy exercises, but you don't feel it at the time. The next day you feel like you're crippled though! :rotfl:

Xx

juno

Ooooh, a great exercise for tummy toning. You need a football (like a normal size kids plastic football thing will do).

Anyway, lie on your back and put your legs in the air but knees bent at 90 degrees. Hold football, and raise your arms keeping em straight. Then slowly straighten right leg, whilst simultaneously lowering your arms (straight) to the floor. Don't take your arms or leg totally to the floor, you wanna be kinda \__/ at the end. Only do it as far as is comfy. Then slowly move everything back to the start position, and repeat with the other leg.

I've explained it badly, but it's a great exercise if you can understand it

BigMummaF

Morning! Can't stop on here...lots to catch up on & a few appointments to get organised for....


Hey.......like the sound of the exercises......can I use a hoist to help lift bits of me up till me muss kulls start doin' it for themselves:rotfl: :rotfl:

Hope you have a better day at work Rose....do you get the floods & stuff in your neck of the woods?

:hello: ILGD..sorry to see you're a little down again....blame that rotten bug you had.... maybe if we start talking d-o-g our esteemed feline friend will take the bait:rolleyes:

Gilly Bodge! not letting the bu99ers get you down I see..top man!...:rolleyes: that would make a good name for a gents shop:D

Any more bookings for hen nights Gario? I could make my fortune selling opera glasses if you did:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: I would say howzit hangin but think I'd better just send wishes for a pleasant day:eek:

That scan thingy sounds interesting Tulip...good luck with it....but then you're our resident Lucky Fairy with all the comps you win:p Have you found a way to send your Tulip Dust thru the little holes in the computer yet:D

To those who are on the darker side at the moment, I hope today brings the beginning of a break-through for you:o IMHO, if I didn't laugh.....I would have turned up me toes years ago. I hope I haven't offended anyone in my quest to bring a smile to your lips...

Peaceful Minds folks. BMFx

Miss_tbc

rose07 wrote: »

hello

Im not sure if i can help, but wanted to say something

I think you are realising something that has been eating away at you for a while. But you didnt realise it woulda been your oh.

I think we all need someone, but they have to be the right someone, if they are pulling you down further, then you might need to ask yourself what you really want. And whether its worth persuing or leaving. But 20 years is an awful long time. Have you spoke to your oh?

Like mumma says bad things happen to good people.

We are all here for you, if you need to talk pm me anytime

take care

xxxx

i have spoken and we have agreed to go for councelling but i am realistic and think its going to be a long journey i think your right i maybe did know it deep down i thought he was my only rock and he led me to believe that after having a difficult and unloving childhood and a relationship with someone who promised to be there for me when my family would allow me to because they felt he was not right for me and stopped the relationship he met someone else while waiting for me and went on to have a very successful life i feel so many male figures in my life have let me down and have had many years of frustration asking for my husbands support with my depression his response has always been im not an emotional person and i cause my own problems because i think to much about issues

After speaking to a professional in this field i have begun to realise i am living in a controlling relationship that has robbed me of all my self confidence and now know i am facing some big issues in my life.

Thanks for your comment about bad things happening to good people hopefully i will find other good people in my life at the moment i am destraught and having been given antidepressants to help me through this time unfortunately they can affect your weight and this is also one of my husbands issues although he denys it if i ask him he can also make comments about my weight by the way i am a size 12 and 5ft 7 not what i would consider an issue.

We met fairly young and have both had many issues in our life i woke up to the fact his family had been bullying me for a long time and have not stopped him from seeing them but am not prepared to accept this behaviour from them his comments are "you look at it the wrong way its only a laugh you take it to serious" my view yes a laugh at my expense and your prepared to let that happen i have been unwell for a few years now and getting stronger i have suffered a nervous breakdown and dont want to go back there he has to realise this or there is no future.

Thanks for your reply i think i am going to be needing all the support i can get at the moment and appreciate your help.

Miss_tbc

CCStar wrote: »

OMG that sounds like me when things don't go right between us, and no it isn't me incognito!

Had a big shock today. We were talking about leaving here around April time before now. Our lease runs out at the end of February but can stay till the end of March but no longer. They want to sell to friends, we don't want to buy the place but feel scared. My OH isn't happy in his job, so with the having to leave here, we need to think where next? Together or not? I feel very frightened and excited. I don't know where to go next. I guess after not being able to do something for so long, then being able is scary.

hope everything works out for you maybe it would be good to make some time to sit down and talk about what you are looking for in the next few years i suppose its like financial planning but could be called future planning.

Sometimes i think men need to see things laid out in front of them more i know i have been guilty at times of presuming he knows what i want and have come to the conclusion if you dont ask you dont get funny enough he has said this about other things in his life.

Good luck

meyore

BigMummaF wrote: »

Morning! Can't stop on here...lots to catch up on & a few appointments to get organised for....


Hey.......like the sound of the exercises......can I use a hoist to help lift bits of me up till me muss kulls start doin' it for themselves:rotfl: :rotfl:

Lol! Sounds like a good plan! :rotfl:

meyore

Well I've been to the opticians. He said I don't need knew glasses, I just need to wear the ones I've got more often...

Going off to my dads garage now to see if I can use it to clean my car, pump up the tyres a bit etc. Going away on Friday and I want a clean car to go in!

Xx

meyore

Wow, I've just realised tomorrow is Friday-thats cheered me up a lot!

Xx