Depression Support Thread

rose07

Miss_tbc wrote: »

hello

I am on this thread in a different name normally but due to this situation i am in i have a new name.

I have been woken up to the fact that for 20 odd years of marriage that much of this has been controlled by my husband and i didnt see it (put him on a peddal stool thought he was there for me).

It recently came to a head when we had an arguement about an issue recently and everything clicked into place after getting a professional opinion i am now certain this has been going on for as long as i can remember and not realised it has been contributing towards my illness (causing panic attacks, anxiety etc) the thing is i have been desperately seeking his support and he has been saying im paranoid about situations and acts in denial when i have questioned his motives) i am devestated as i had felt he was my rock and i have had many problems to face and a lot of problems in childhood to overcome which after councelling recognised my upbringing involved emotitional deprevation and i had to come to terms with this and have no family support because of this (basically) the circumstances were they were neglecting my emotional needs and couldnt see what they had done now im in the same situation in my marriage im devestated.

Why oh why is this happening to me and do you know what the irony of it all is i am the most caring person you could wish to meet, i have been advised to get some support and help on this matter but so many things click into place as to what has been going on and when i question him as to why he doesent support me he is quick to come back and say if you dont want to stay in this marriage then thats fine by me..

hello

Im not sure if i can help, but wanted to say something

I think you are realising something that has been eating away at you for a while. But you didnt realise it woulda been your oh.

I think we all need someone, but they have to be the right someone, if they are pulling you down further, then you might need to ask yourself what you really want. And whether its worth persuing or leaving. But 20 years is an awful long time. Have you spoke to your oh?

Like mumma says bad things happen to good people.

We are all here for you, if you need to talk pm me anytime

take care

xxxx

rose07

My day at work just went on and on today, I was wondering if the time would ever pass by. And i swear im the only one that does anything :rotfl:

But then i went to the gym , i went on the cross trainer for 30 mins, then on the rowing machine i did 2000 metres, and then i went on the cycling, and did a fitness test, you do 5 mins of cycling on a certain level and then ya get a fitness score and a catergory. I did level 10, which is like going up a kinda hill, so i did it and got my fitness score and then got my catergory, guess what i got .......elite :D:D come on!!!!

oh meyore, do you know of any exercises i can do with a yoga mat? just i need some exercises to tone me tummy, do ya know any? any help much appreciated

I tell ya its a good way of feelin good, ive been feelin really up and down, with lots going on, but exercise really does help

Ive got my gp appntment tomorrow :eek::eek:, and im not sure quite what to say, but think i should tell him bout the psych. Did i tell yas she even told me i should act more my age!!! !!!!!! does that mean? she said i act older than i am, and that i should do something people my age do, like surfing, or something, i mean omg, what does she want me to do? Maybe i will do a dance on her table next time i see her, :mad::mad:

right im off to have a shower, and get ready for tomorrow day at work

hope your all ok

xxx

meyore

Feeling rubbish today. Still wound up about the work thing, but couldn't bring myself to speak to my manager, so its just been eating away at me. She even took me out the back for a chat about how well I'm doing, but I couldn't say anything back because I would've cried if I did.

Its 3 peoples from works birthdays this week and they were passing round cards to sign. This made me mad too, because a couple of weeks everyone forgot my birthday. I feel bad for being grumpy about this, I think I'm being petty.

A lady came in to pay a utility bill for a chinese restaurant and I recognised the name of it as belonging to someone I used to know when I worked in the bookies a few years ago. I mentioned him to her and she said "you haven't heard have you? Charlie died in a car crash in May". I'm so shocked and really mad the people who I worked with never bothered mentioning it. They tell me gossip about people, yet real important things they don't think to say. I feel silly for feeling upset because it happened ages ago though.

I've just come home and been lying in bed crying, I'm really sick of today.

Horace

RBK - If only you lived near me, I'd go shopping with you and meet you for a coffee. I hate going shopping on my own because I always end up spending more money than I mean to. I appreciate the difficulty in making new friends and maintaining relationships because I am probably the world's worst - I'll say that I'll phone and the next thing I realise is that 6-12 months has gone by:eek: Sorry that you self-harm - have never done it myself - (((HUGS))).

I have never organised a wedding for a friend before so this will be a tad scarey, don't worry I'll be wearing something other than a hat and a smile:rotfl: - hopefully I will have lost weight by then and will most likely wear a pale lilac linen suit or dress.

I didn't go to work today although that hasn't stopped me doing some research tonight. I had to go to the eye hospital for a check up plus I finished the course of steroid tablets they gave me too:j Unfortunately, despite suffering from humungous headaches (I was convinced that my eye pressures had risen into double figures at long last), the eye pressures remain resolutely low although there has been a slight rise in my left eye from 2 to 3. Hey ho, I shall keep taking the drops and shall see them again on 30 January. I collected my suit and best coat from my ex's house (I still have a lot of furniture there and clothes) and he was kind and took me to and picked me up from the hospital. He also came shopping with me and persuaded me to buy a guillotine (I can't cut straight even using scissors) plus I got a few other bits n bats in Aldi.

I saw one of my noisy neighbours on the stairs today and told her that she and her friend keep me awake at night - she firstly denied making any noise until I described the noise in detail and then she looked somewhat embarrassed and shamefaced. I am waiting to catch the guy who lives in the basement flat - the toad has been bashing my car door with his doors - I know its him because of the colour of the paint left behind plus my car hasn't moved for several days whereas he always parks next to me:mad: The selfish pig - he might drive around in a rust bucket but I certainly don't. I am madder than a cut snake:mad:

I am going to have a hairwash now might catch ya laters.

Horace x

Tulip

:hello: Everyone,

Hope you are all ok,I am fine RBK: Shop and scan is where you have a little clicker and you barcode all that you buy in the week on a Sunday and you have little coloured cards to work with blue which has the panelists name eg my name as there is only me doing this then a few yellow cards for the purchaser where I have shopped at say Asda for example and a green card with till reciept prices on with a rough guess of one saying 0-99.Only started this today and already have enough points for a gift voucher but I am going to wait for a while and accumilate points for a bit for a few months or so

Katie

BizzyBek

Meyore, the good news is most of today is behind us and as Scarlet O'Hara would say 'tomorrow is another day'. (Anyone replying with 'frankly my dear I don't give a damn' will get a smacked bum!) Wrap up in something snuggle and be sure you are in the comfort of home and this thread.

meyore

Thanks

Tomorrow will be better because I don't have work. Going to the opticians then I'm going to clean my car for the first time since I bought it! Might go to my grans too.

Xx

Tulip

RBK:

I have now found the website if you wish to apply for the Shop and Scan panel,sadly I cannot refer you as the invite has to come directly from them I had to wait a while and now I am on it

http://www.volunteer4panels.com/


love and light,

Katie xxx

Tulip

well I am off now as I am so tired

chat tomorrow


Night! Night!


love and light,

Katie xxx

meyore

Add another !!!! up to today. My mum gave me the money for her lottery ticket and I forgot to get it. She won £62 and I didn't have the heart to say I didn't remember, so I have to give her the money. I don't know whats wrong with me.