Depression Support Thread

shazrobo

meyore wrote: »

Hi all,

Ill today, bloody kidney infection for the 3rd time in the last six months. Got antibiotics, but the doctor basically just fobbed me off as usual. I can't be bothered with them, but it hurt so I had to go.

I had to go to work, can't afford not to. Everyone thought I was hungover and I couldn't convince them otherwise. Oh well, can't really be bothered to care what they think either.

Hope everyone is ok

Xx

hope your better soon meyore
big hugs
shaz x

shazrobo

been feeling ok most of today after seeing my counsillor and talking. so why after talking to exbf on phone why am i crying?:mad: :mad:
fed up of feeling like this, i really am. feel so dreadfully alone, even tho some of the times with him were awful, some of them were pretty good. really miss being part of a couple, the hugs the closeness. hate this empiness
shaz x

geminilady

shazrobo wrote: »

been feeling ok most of today after seeing my counsillor and talking. so why after talking to exbf on phone why am i crying?:mad: :mad:
fed up of feeling like this, i really am. feel so dreadfully alone, even tho some of the times with him were awful, some of them were pretty good. really miss being part of a couple, the hugs the closeness. hate this empiness
shaz x

Hi Shaz,Hearing his voice will hurt and upset you,why are you talking on the phone thought you had agreed not to contact each other.Just realised i may have mixed you up with Steph but still wonder why you are in contact if the relationship is over.

shazrobo

hi geminilady, he still rings me, tells me he still loves me, and wants us to get back together, says he has changed, but i dont trust him, think he will always be controlling and emotionally abusive
miss him like mad, still love him, but cannot trust him
shaz x

Horasio

Stephb1986 wrote: »

i know he will miss me over the weekend im working so i wont notice as much i dont think i could trust someone again this hurts so much last night i had pains in my chest i guess it was my heart breaking i cant eat anything at all

thanks for all your kind words they really help

Stephb xx

When I broke up with my ex, I felt sick for a whole month.

I pampered myself by having luxury nightly baths and enjoying being free and discovering myself again.

The next month I dated a great guy and felt I had moved on. I did break up with him too, one day I just went off him. I can't work out why but stayed friends with him.

I am sure there is a great guy just around the corner who will make your ex seem dreadful.

Unfortunately, you have to go thro pain whilst healing - I equate it to having surgery, it hurts before it heals.

Horasio

shazrobo wrote: »

hi geminilady, he still rings me, tells me he still loves me, and wants us to get back together, says he has changed, but i dont trust him, think he will always be controlling and emotionally abusive
miss him like mad, still love him, but cannot trust him
shaz x

Excuse me butting in here but I have similar feelings with males I have got close to in the past.

Is there a pattern where if you break up or threaten to, he becomes all nice then once he gets your trust again, he goes back to his old ways and so on?

What did he do that was emotionally controlling and abusive?

Horasio

geminilady wrote: »

Hi Shaz,Hearing his voice will hurt and upset you,why are you talking on the phone thought you had agreed not to contact each other.Just realised i may have mixed you up with Steph but still wonder why you are in contact if the relationship is over.

Yes, one of the rules of a break up is no contact - it confuses things too much. A clean break helps you heal faster and discover the real you again.

antronella

CCStar wrote: »

Yes, one of the rules of a break up is no contact - it confuses things too much. A clean break helps you heal faster and discover the real you again.

This is so so true. Having contact is like picking at a wound that is trying to heal. It opens it up again and becomes more painful...and then takes longer to heal. If he's contacting you on your mobile...you can see who it is..so don't answer it..or ask your network to block calls from that number. If its on your landline..don't answer it, then do 1471 to check who it was and if you need to ring back. 'Cold turkey' is really the only way. good luck Steph and Shaz..the pain WILL get easier.. I promise xx

shazrobo

antronella wrote: »

This is so so true. Having contact is like picking at a wound that is trying to heal. It opens it up again and becomes more painful...and then takes longer to heal. If he's contacting you on your mobile...you can see who it is..so don't answer it..or ask your network to block calls from that number. If its on your landline..don't answer it, then do 1471 to check who it was and if you need to ring back. 'Cold turkey' is really the only way. good luck Steph and Shaz..the pain WILL get easier.. I promise xx

thanks for the advice antronella, i am ignoring my mobile if his number comes up, but its bit harder to ignore my landline at mo, one of my sons is in a resedential school, and often phones me, he would get terribly upset and worries if i didnt answer, and his school's phone dosent seem to leave a number on 1471. daniel is home friday so for two weeks i will be able to ignore the landline too
thanks
shaz x

shazrobo

CCStar wrote: »

Excuse me butting in here but I have similar feelings with males I have got close to in the past.

Is there a pattern where if you break up or threaten to, he becomes all nice then once he gets your trust again, he goes back to his old ways and so on?

What did he do that was emotionally controlling and abusive?

hi ccstar, yes there is a pattern, we have been close to splitting before, and he starts been nice, usually for upto 2 weeks, then goes back to his old ways.
he puts me down, and when i get upset says its all in my head, makes me feel inadequate that the house isnt perfect, it is clean but there is usually a couple of items out of place whose house is perfect with kids?
tells me what i should be feeling, hates me going anywhere, even appoinments, thinks i should always be available to him, says i dont love him, if i want time to myself, could go on, but i won't.
he made me feel so bad that i attempted suicide this year twice while i have been with him, therefore in his mind everything is my fault cos i'm mental like my kids.
yeah my kids go to special schools, and have probs understanding sometimes, but they are lovely kids, and him putting them down even though not to them directly, really hurts
thanks
shaz x