Looking for a new job due to bullying

wheezy57

Sorry, I can't respond to your post.

Takeaway_Addict

wheezy57 wrote: »

Sorry, I can't respond to your post.

No problem but my point about talking to someone if you are having suicidal thoughts stands, and I wish you well.

wheezy57

I wish you could take my posts as a whole and not zoom into the suicide part. Those thoughts were in context with what was happening to me at that time.

Having been bullied yourself Im surprised you responded in such a banal and rather simplistic manner.

'Oh feel crap today - must go and talk to someone - that will sort it out'

Really!

Takeaway_Addict

wheezy57 wrote: »

I wish you could take my posts as a whole and not zoom into the suicide part. Those thoughts were in context with what was happening to me at that time.

Having been bullied yourself Im surprised you responded in such a banal and rather simplistic manner.

'Oh feel crap today - must go and talk to someone - that will sort it out'

Really!

Maybe you should read my posts better as well? I said 'if', if you are not feeling suicidal then do whatever but if you are then suggesting you speak to someone is valid advice.

falko89

Its sad that in this day and age people have to go through this and there is sweet FA you can do, you can walk away and face sanctions which will more than likely lead to further mental health issues, you can try and find another job but if you're anything like me winning the lottery has better odds or you can stick it out, that's the choices

andydiysaver

read "snakes in suits" - often the bully is a psychopath and work is their outlet


I find it worse when the bully is a boss because then the choice is leave or get damaged, you will not win. I had a situation like it a few years ago - and I left. My technique for the new interview was to say why I was right for the new job, not mention the bully once. My reference was a senior manager who was on my side from another department. I would not let the bully ruin my career with a bad reference so I didn't tell the bully I was going to anything, I just got a new job and got out. POINT BEING - you do it while you're a whole person, strong enough to interview well and not come across as a damaged wreck. There was a older lady in her fifties in poor health who really got abused daily by this evil manager, I remember thinking, age is against her, confidence is against her due to the years of chipping away at self worth this psyho manager had inflicted., she'll still be there when she retires. this is NOT a situation you want. If the abusive colleague is the boss then it's every bit as serious as an abusive relationship - you get out while you can get out and odds on that decimate over time.


In my new job - there's a bully colleague, the part of the furniture I'm right cause I've been here 15 years type - condescending aggressive, rude, and quite the little bully with a particular problem with men, not just me, but its a world of difference. This person, though a nasty piece of work, isn't my boss so if I'm wronged, I can defend myself, so that's what I do and I'm happy in my job. From the start she shouted and screamed and belittled me, not because I was bad at my job but because I was new and still learning. I stood up to her every time she went off on it, and she now only dares speak to me via email (emails are still laced with put downs, if they're sufficiently nasty I forward them to bosses - in reality I've won) but I see her being horrible to others that are easier pickings. unfortunately many in the working world are just there for drama and unpleasantry. I personally think rank is the deciding factor in it all. You can tell a colleague not to talk to you like that, you cannot say that to a boss as easily esp as in some cases these psycho bosses spend a decade/two decade cultivating their position within the company. Best solution there is to laugh at their complete lack of any life outside the big fat desk at the top of the room and make arrangements to leave !

PHILANTHROPIST

wheezy57 wrote: »

I wish you could take my posts as a whole and not zoom into the suicide part. Those thoughts were in context with what was happening to me at that time.

Having been bullied yourself Im surprised you responded in such a banal and rather simplistic manner.

'Oh feel crap today - must go and talk to someone - that will sort it out'

Really!

There seem to be many threads being intermixed into one. Hey ho.

With regard to Wheezy - For starters please read the helpful document below and if it is not too upsetting please report back with further and better particulars of the alleged acts of bullying and harassment, including key dates. We may then be better positioned to offer some legal guidance :

http://www.acas.org.uk/media/pdf/d/i...-employers.pdf

wheezy57

I recall reading a lot of information about workplace bullying and the Acas website was one of them.