Looking for a new job due to bullying

DKLS

Ladybird1975 wrote: »

I have previously asked for advice on a work place issue and got some great advice from people. I spoke with the person involved first to see if that resolved the issue but it just made it worse to her actually questioning my work in front of the MD and making it clear she feels I am not good enough although no one else has any issues with my work. As a result I have made the decision to get another job as I have no support from my colleagues or MD they prefer to ignore it. When I go for an interview I know I will be asked why I am looking for another job. Should I be honest and say why or keep quiet and give another reason.

I wouldnt mention any bullying at interview or lack of support, whilst I havent worked with many people who are bullies I have and do work for some very robust people and If I was interviewing It would cast doubt at your ability to interact with some of these robust characters.

Regardless of whether you leave or fight your corner, perhaps its worth seeking out some additional training in Communications skills, interpersonal skills, conflict resolution etc so you would feel more confident and have the tools to help you in a similar situation.

Mulder00

To answer the OP's question, don't mention this in an interview. In an interview focus on the positives and speak positively about looking for a new role, new challenges, new environment etc. You don't have to lie, but when you start focusing on the negatives, it ends up being a slippery slope from there. All you will end up with is a very negative "feeling" interview and generally people don't want to employ someone who brings negativity with them.

Also, from a potential employer's perspective, they want someone who wants the job because of the prospects, not because it's a way to escape their current situation.

Keep it upbeat and positive and look at any new job as a new opportunity. (I know it's VERY difficult to do!)

falko89

I have also been bullied in my current job which I mentioned some time back, and like you HR etc didn't give a rats, I've been to a few interviews and not 1 asked why I wanted to leave my current job.

poorlittlefish

I stood up to a workplace bully and all that happened was they made my life a whole lot worse by turning the rest of the team against me. They also went to my manager (who I'd told about the bullying) to raise a complaint and the allegations made against me were total lies. I was actively discouraged from raising a grievance and I got so depressed that I decided I'd rather take my chances and resign than put up with any more of it.

When I've been asked why I left my job I've just said that I resigned because I felt I'd gone as far as I could in the company and wished to move onto new challenges that would increase my motivation and learning. Absolutely do not mention the bullying because you could be looked on unjustly as all sorts of things - unable to cope with stress, weak, trouble, potential for sickness absence etc.

metalmosher

wheezy57 wrote: »

Why on earth would you want to work with someone who is a complete !!!!!!.

Because the world is full of them, and walking away from this one doesn't mean you won't have to face another one in the next job.

It may not seem like it, but I mean this in a positive way, based on previous experience - I've walked away from a job I loved more than once because of one or more people making life difficult, but there'll always be another one just waiting to come along. Better to learn how to deal with it and not let them affect your decisions and your career, than spend your life moving from job to job. Its not easy and I've definitely not mastered it yet, but its all an important learning curve. It sounds like you had the fantastic courage to stand up to them the first time, so now's the time to follow through!

Ladybird1975

Unfortunately this lady does have a reputation from other companies for being a bully. I have made it clear to her that she is out of order undermining me and that it is down to the boss to let me know if my work is not up to scratch however she replied telling me that as a single parent I cannot be able to do a good job, my daughter is an adult who works full time so that has no effect on my work. The issue stems from her having a qualification I don't however I have plenty of other qualifications that are just as good. She also keeps reminding me that I only have 8 years of experience and she has 13 so she is much better than me. My boss has said I do a good job and I have emails from customers thanking me for good customer service and helping them when they needed it.

I did have a job interview today and when asked about my present position and why I want to leave I just said that I feel I have gone as far as I can and I am looking for further ways to expand my knowledge and progress.

When I do finally leave I will make it clear why in the hope that something will be done to stop it happening again.

wheezy57

She sounds a complete nightmare. But you however come over as being the opposite.

Isnt it strange how this women hasnt been stopped from her behaviour before. I suspect that she makes people feel afraid of her.

Again I wish you all the very best in your new job.

mattcanary

wheezy57 wrote: »

She sounds a complete nightmare. But you however come over as being the opposite.

Isnt it strange how this women hasnt been stopped from her behaviour before. I suspect that she makes people feel afraid of her.

Again I wish you all the very best in your new job.

As well as pretty dim - as if having 13 years worth of experience compared to eight makes much, if any difference!

PHILANTHROPIST

Hi Ladybird. Only just read your post(s) re this unfortunate matter.

All that I can offer is some objective guidance based on my own personal dealings with far too many examples of similar workplace issues.

First you are not alone. Sadly, bullying albeit to varying degrees is virtually ubiquitous in the workplace.

I cannot comment on the "should I stay or should I go" debate and in any event that does not appear to the purpose of your post. That decision is yours.

Working on the assumption that you have decided to leave then my guidance would be as follows ; this is more from a tactical perspective.

I note that you do not appear to have raised a formal grievance. It may be upsetting to do so, and it may take a while to be heard, and the outcome may well not be satisfactory, but tactically it may achieve two purposes albeit with a caveat as below.

First by raising a grievance you should at least have your voice heard and the alleged bully will at least be spoken to and possibly given an informal warning or worse. You are not entitled to be directly informed of the outcome re action (if any) taken against your alleged perpetrator. You will ,however, be told whether your grievance was upheld - sadly most are dealt with subjectively and outcomes are rarely in the employee's best interests.

Second, as you are looking for a new job then your potential new employer may well seek a reference. At this time you have no clue what the reference (if any) may say. Hopefully, it would be a glowing reference, but your current employer may offer a bog standard reference ..i.e. "applicant did work for us as a xxxx and was employed from x date to x date". Such neutral references may conceivably raise alarm bells to a new employer. The possible merit of raising said grievance may be that your current employer may be somewhat concerned that you are taking "advice" and that you may ultimately go as far as submitting an employment tribunal claim in particular in the 3 months post termination. Without knowing the entire facts and circumstances of the matter this stage it would prima facie appear to be way OTT to even contemplate an ET claim, but if your employer had such a concern in the back of their mind then as a fair and reasonable compromise they may be willing to offer you an agreed form of wording for an exemplary, yet truthful, reference that should serve you well in your future career.

For the avoidance of doubt I do not recommend making any threats and there is a balance to be sought as you may well not even want to risk antagonising your current employer.

A tactical alternative may be to receive another job offer and hope your proposed new employer receives a glowing reference . If not, and god forbid, the reference is either denied or is deemed unsatisfactory, then , assuming you had already left your old firm, then you have the right to
raise a post termination grievance. The above process may then be repeated.

Hope the above makes sense. If you require clarification simply ask. The choice is of course the OP's.

mumcoll

My OH has just resigned from a job due to being very unhappy. His supervisor is a total control freak, he says she tells him what to do 'short of putting my fingers on the keys of the keyboard'.

He has always been very proud of doing a good job but she has criticised every single thing he's done. 'Don't say it like that, say this'. 'Ring those 30 people' An hour later 'Have you rung those 30 people' 'Your voicemail's too long' etc... etc.....

She took away every bit of confidence and he's been working since 1971!