Nursery Concerns.....what to do for the best?

FBaby

I had the same issue with DS nursery although it was moving from toddler room to older kids room. His behaviour was not very good in the toddler room and he wasn't very happy there. They acknowledged that he need more mental stimulation but due to his age (6 months younger than the age by which they normally moved to group) his behaviour and lack of space they refused to consider it. Then one day only a couple of weeks later they announced he was moving the following week. That was because the assistant manager who was excellent considered that his behaviour was linked to his being bored and one a place did come available he was considered most appropriate to move. Sure enough his behaviour improved massively in just a few weeks as he loved starting to lean reading and writing and the structure suited him better.

Did you ask when they expect the next space to be available and whether they can confirm he will be the next to move? I think a system purely based on actual age not to be impressive as as all children evolve at different speed. Saying that my bit did find his last year at nursery very long as most of his friends had moved to school that September but they did make sure to give him plenty of stimulation.

sacha28

Flippin hell just read that back....how neurotic do I sound???!!!

quidsy

You are giving too much thought to his midset. He is too young to care where he is every day. Trust me, my son can't remember a boy who left his class last year & he is 6. I aked him a while back if he rememberd living in thailand & going to nursery there when he was 2 till 3. Nope, no a single recollection.

sacha28

His best friend isn't just a nursery friend, they see each other out of nursery as well so I don't think he would forget him.

I absolutely get what you're saying, when his keyworker left in September it took him a couple of weeks to adjust but he did. We were looking back over his nursery diaries last week and a picture of his previous keyworker came up. What did he say? 'Who's that mummy?' He had no idea who she was so I know what you're saying is right.

As for him not caring where he is? I get that too but I care where he spends his day. I care whether he is spending his days with children his own age or babies that can't even walk yet, let alone talk to him. I care that he is spending his day doing activities that are mainly centred around children that are much younger than him because he is the only child left that is over 12 months old.

Or have I totally misconstrued what you meant?

FBaby

I think it does come down to behaviour. If he is seeming contented there will no pressure to move him. Have you noticed any change recently?

quidsy

sacha28 wrote: »

His best friend isn't just a nursery friend, they see each other out of nursery as well so I don't think he would forget him.

I absolutely get what you're saying, when his keyworker left in September it took him a couple of weeks to adjust but he did. We were looking back over his nursery diaries last week and a picture of his previous keyworker came up. What did he say? 'Who's that mummy?' He had no idea who she was so I know what you're saying is right.

As for him not caring where he is? I get that too but I care where he spends his day. I care whether he is spending his days with children his own age or babies that can't even walk yet, let alone talk to him. I care that he is spending his day doing activities that are mainly centred around children that are much younger than him because he is the only child left that is over 12 months old.

Or have I totally misconstrued what you meant?

Yes you have. He will settle in a new nursery that offeras him the developmental needs he requires. At that age they are not loyal or as attached to places & people as parents assume. If they dont put him up to the right age group, move him to a new nursery. In a week he wont remember the old place.

sacha28

sorry quidsy, I have a habit of doing that!

My son's behaviour over the past few weeks has become 'challenging' but we have put this down to 1) age and 2) the fact he doesn't sleep much at night.

He spends quite a bit of time crawling around the front room saying 'goo, goo. ga, mummy's baby boy' which I find quite cute but, given the fact he is stuck playing with babies all day, concerning as well.

quidsy

You really don't want his behaviour & habits to regress, I would def push to have the meeting sooner rather than later. Good luck with it.

warehouse

Why do people use a nursery? It's a case of get as many kids in as possible with the least staffing cost. They want to make as much money as they can, as quickly as they can and some of the people they hire are simply not good enough to care AND develop children.

DigForVictory

Talk to them.

If they can't keep your lad happy & busy, no matter how old he is, then while they've done a good job so far & up to this stage you'd recommend them, loyalty to their business has no place alongside loyalty to your son.

See how this meeting goes & if they can sort a space sharpish.

If not, he'll still see his pal some days & can meet even more small people at another nursery. It is inconvenient but not fatal nor necessarily damaging. They'll all be jumbled up at primary anyway, so a bit of practice at coping with puzzlement (& ongoing forgetting of things) won't be that hazardous.

As for the OT why use a nursery - because sometimes a combination of ethics & needing to eat mean we have very little choice.