equal balance?

Georgiegirl256

Caz3121 wrote: »

A friend had this and sat down with hubby and stated that it was obvious that both working full time meant that it was difficult to get anything done so she gave him the options
1) Pay a cleaner to come in to do house/ironing etc
2) she moves to part time work to free up the time to do the extra required
3) he needs to find the time to do his share

he went with option 2 which worked for them

She had to go part time just to get some housework done? Do they live in a Mansion or something?!

unholyangel

claire16c wrote: »

Glad it worked for them but this also shocks me. I mean seriously she worked part time just to get some house work done as he clearly didn't want to do it? I'd like to know if he would have been willing to go part time! How much housework are these people doing?!

I suppose it depends on a few things. Take a few dogs, add a few kids and add my OH into the mix and that will be pretty much a never ending cleaning job. My OH is terrible though. Even making a sandwich, the kitchen looks like he's been trying to make a 3 course dinner for 12. :rotfl:

As for the whole part time thing..part time could be 30 hours with her only giving up one day a week. Plus while it shouldn't be regarded as a womans duty, that doesn't mean that women should never do it all. Every relationship needs to find their own balance. But it should be a balance that both of them are happy with and neither should feel like a dogsbody.

Indie_Kid

Dad does more housework than mum. But she works more hours than him.

valkirn

How it works in our house,

Well for a start we are both seasonal workers ie he works as an industrial cleaner his work picks up from Feb to Oct and he can be out working 14hr shifts 7 days a week, during this time i pick up the household chores all childcare etc.

From the end of Oct to the end of Jan his work has all but finished for the year so i up my hours of work to as many as i can get and thus the roles reverse i go out to work he picks up household chores and all childcare.

Any free time we have together everything is split 50/50 though sometimes i get a couple more nights out than he does but hes non too bothered.

As for the "its different for men" twaddle its just as easy for a woman to say "its different for us too" but at the end of the day you both live in the house you both eat you both are clothed and you both made a child together therefore you both should in theory share household chores time out etc.

KxMx

Caz3121 wrote: »

A friend had this and sat down with hubby and stated that it was obvious that both working full time meant that it was difficult to get anything done so she gave him the options
1) Pay a cleaner to come in to do house/ironing etc
2) she moves to part time work to free up the time to do the extra required
3) he needs to find the time to do his share

he went with option 2 which worked for them

maman wrote: »

I'm glad I'm not the only one that found the going part-time unacceptable. If my DH had suggested that I compromise my career and reduce my income so that I could become a skivvy I'd have hit the roof. Plus I just can't imagine where all this housework comes from. If you're out all day working surely there can't be that much to do.

The female in this scenario presented that as an option to her OH though, not the other way round, her choice enabled him to choose that.

As for the "it's different for men" sadly in some cases this is true. Some Mothers raise sons in such a manner that they have everything done for them (bar a wiped bottom) and then that son expects his wife/partner to continue the role.

The only way to break that cycle is for said wife/partner to make a stand, carrying on doing everything only enables the dependency on the man's part.

Kaz2904

In our house, we split it. It is rarely split fairly because DH works Mon- Fri 9-5.30 and I work nights.
I am unable to keep him away from supermarkets so I now don't go. I know he will go nearly every day and if he doesn't need to, he can divert to one on his way home from work. So I don't unless I need something specific.
I no longer menu plan. Because he moans about having set meals.
I rarely cook now- if he's off, there's no way I'm cooking. I need a menu plan if I'm expected to get out of bed and clean the house whilst cooking everyone's tea because I can't think straight. As he hate a meal plan, he has to cook when he gets home from work or agree to a menu plan.
I do all of the house organizing and cleaning of skirting boards etc and would happily cook every day but will not tolerate everyone complaining about the food they are served at every single meal time so they can go stuff themselves.