Learning to think like a frugal person

chanie

I have been more relaxed with the plan - not horrendously, but I just haven't been as careful as I previously was. I haven't done my 'pause, plan, pay' as much and I really noticed the benefits whilst I was doing it, so I really want to get back on the ball. I do think I have changed my spending habits, but they aren't fully ingrained yet, so its important I don't loose my focus.

Credits over the past few months
1. I've kept up my allocation of monthly play money, which is working really well.

2. Planning ahead - have bought DS two full sets of school uniform as he starts school in September. I have been buying a few bits and pieces over the past few months, to spread the cost and it means I won't be stressed in September, if the shop runs out of uniform.

3. trips out - I managed to get some cheap Zoo tickets and we had a lovely day out with the children - we took a packed lunch so didn't cost us anything whilst we were there. We are planning another trip.

4. I bough the Beck book, it was reduced to £2 in the Amazon Kindle Store, so I thought it would be rude not to.......

ForMyGirls

Yay to you Chanie - it's sounds like you are doing really well. One of the things I have learnt from the Beck dieting blog is that there will be ups and downs with all this - times where we are totally on track and times when we're a bit less focused - and that it will get easier to be on track, but that it won't ever be completely automatic. At least that seems to be the gig in the world of dieting and I imagine that for me at least, it will probably be very true for the world of budgeting too.

LOL re buying the Beck book :-)

Day 5 today - in the dieting world it is about eating slowly and mindfully. I can't remember now how I translated it before - but right now it feels like what that is in the world of money is buying one thing at a time, and really savouring it. I think I have a propensity to be a binge shopper - I scrimp and save and then blowout in a frenzy. So that is what I shall practice.

Nervous day today - I had the car in for a service and it has been having clutch problems so I was worried that I wouldn't be able to afford it. Fortunately it came in within the money I got from the tax return and I have about $100 left of the tax return for next month's bills. Phew. And thank goodness I'm back here, because otherwise I'd be blowing it I'm sure! The mechanic always cleans the car, which I love because I am incredibly slack about doing that, especially in winter - so I really enjoyed driving the car home tonight. Only as I write this that I realise that was a bit of the 'mindful' spending happening - enjoying the clean car that I knew was safe to drive. Friday mornings I work in a slightly remote location so I am extra pleased to know the car will be reliable tomorrow!

Enough rambling - my credits - 1) took a packed lunch today even though I was running short of time - just grabbed things out of the pantry that could be turned into lunch rather than saying "too little time, I'll buy lunch instead" 2) used the coffee machine at work for free coffee, instead of buying 3) read my ARC and did my reading this morning.

ForMyGirls

Day 6 today - finding a budgeting coach. Whacko - I have found you already! So I decided to make my focus for the day concentrating on Day 5 - "Mindful spending".

I treated myself to bought lunch today. It was in budget - using up the last of my play money for this pay period. I checked the prices to make sure it wouldn't go over budget and then sat and really delighted in every bite - simultaneously fulfilling slow and mindful eating and slow and mindful spending :-) It was very yummy - just a roll with chicken and salad - but the salad was very fresh and had just the right amount of contrast in tastes. Don't imagine I would have noticed all that if I'd just scoffed it in amongst a spending frenzy!

So - credits: staying in budget; spending mindfully; reading ARC and the Beck book this morning.

ForMyGirls

Day 7 - arranging your environment

I remember that what i did last time with this one was to take myself off mailing lists that send me temptations to spend. Since then i have ended up on one mailing list - so I will make sure i cancel it next time I get the email.

A bit lacklustre today - though that affected my dedication to healthy eating rather than financial responsibility. But i think i needed a lazy day so I am not giving myself a hard time for it. Stopping and reading a book is not something i do enough of in life.

On the credit front: i read my ARC and did my Beck reading. I posted here despite the lacklustreness. I responded to my partner's suggestion of going out to lunch by saying that would be lovely but he would need to pay. Fear of being a TA who doesn't pay their way is a big barrier for me so it was good I managed to do this.

ForMyGirls

Hello coaches,

Day 8 today - making time for frugal living. This was a pretty confronting task last time around as I wasn't able to fit everything into life without timetabling my life down to the last 15 minutes. Since then I have reduced my work hours - a struggle financially but making the rest of life infintely more manageable - so this time around it was OK doing this task. In fact quite affirming to see that I can make time for the things that are important without putting myself under unrealistic pressure.

Credits for my day: reading my ARC and doing my Beck reading first thing. Taking the time to do today's task properly. Unsubscribing myself from a mailing list that came through today.

chanie

FMG, well done for all of your hard work. You put in so much groundwork the first time around that I bet you'll breeze through the plan. Something I've remembered - did you ever give into temptation and buy those measuring spoons???

I thought I should revisit the Plan, so I started to 're-read this thread, but I kind of got bored. I don't know if I'm not in the right frame of mind, but I kind of feel I have processes in place which work and I just need to follow them more closely.

The area I need to focus on at the moment is Friday's. This is my day off with the children. I got to a good place where I wasn't spending any money on Fridays, but over the past 6-8 weeks, I've been buying them treats like chocolates and cakes. I've had quite a few errands to do on Fridays over the past few weeks and so when we've been out, I've been treating the children and is now becoming a habit which DS expects. I really need to get back to the point where I only spend if I need to. Luckily, DS will be starting school in September, so I can break the habit then as he won't be with me for most of the day. I'll still have DD with me, but she's a toddler, so it will be easy.

ForMyGirls

Hi Chanie,

How funny that you remembered the measuring spoons! Yes - I did give into temptation :-) But the upside is that I really delight in them everytime I use them and I'm sure I wouldn't if I had just picked them up on a whim the first time I saw them!

Thanks for your encouraging words - you are right, it is a much quicker trip through the plan this time around - more about reminding myself of the habits and recommitting to them, which is a lot less thinking work.

It is great to hear that you have processes in place that are working - that is the ultimate goal isn't it? And great thinking on your part about how to rein in your Friday spending a bit. I so know what you mean about kids developing an expectation that something that is meant to be a treat will happen everytime. Though I think that is probably just a simplified version of the overspending impulse that I'm trying to overcome :-) I look forward to hearing how you get on with the adjustment.

Day 9 here - for the world of diet it is about choosing an exercise plan. I can't remember what I equated it to last time around but today I was thinking that it is about the other side of the coin. In the food world dieting is about reducing calorie intake and exercise is about increasing calorie use. So in the world of money I sort of see there are two parts - one is controlling expenditure and the other bit might be either increasing income or maybe making the most of what you have. It doesn't feel like increasing income is a particularly viable option for me - I am time poor enough as is and I think increasing income would just lead to overwhelm and discontent, which will then probably lead to overspending.

But I do think there is a lot I can do to change how well and efficiently I use what I have - and I think that is probably a path to emotional happiness too as often thrifty steps can lead to unexpected delights. So maybe what I will do is set myself two goals:
- cook at least one meal a week that primarily uses ingredients I already have in the house; and
- always think before I throw anything away "is there a way I could use, re-use or sell this"

Some credits for the day:
- reading ARC and the Beck book and thinking through today's task;
- not buying a treat when grocery shopping;
- not tolerating any section of my YNAB budget having red text!!!

chanie

FMG - I'm pleased you got the measuring spoons. Its only a small thing, but I guess everytime you look at them and use them, you will remember the Plan. I guess they are symbolic.


With Day 9, I think that controlling expenditure will probably be more viable that earning more money for most people. I did have a small business I started, but I just didn't have the time to dedicate to it, so I kind of let it slide.

We all need to find our level of comfort in order to changing our habits. For example, we shop in Lidl/Aldi for our main grocery shop. We could probably knock an extra 10-15% off our bill, but this would require meal planning and a strict shopping list. Whilst I'm all for being frugal, this would be way outside of my comfort zone and I feel a step too far.

Another important point, I've found is making the plan fit in with my life. You use the example of 'think before you throw' but I'm fed up of having a cluttered house, so I just have to get rid of things, otherwise they will just sit around the house and never get used. My aunt has always been really frugal and she had hoarded video tapes of cartoons etc we used to watch as children. However, none of us have video recorders, so it was kind of pointless to save them.

ForMyGirls

Thanks Chanie. Those are such good reminders about being realistic abiut what we can achieve / what level of comfort we are willing to live with.

I am the antithesis of a hoarder (I think it comes from having moved so much in my life - this is something like the 35th house I have lived in!) so I think I am safe from becoming like your Aunt! To my mind it is more about being smart about reusing rather than replacing. Like for instance instead of throwing away a big pile of kids textas because some are worn out and then buying more I could just throw away the dead ones. Chances are the kids will be quite happy using the remaining ones. I am also really wasteful with food so i think i can save by deciding what to cook based on what is already in the cupboards, or by saying "there is left over mashed potato - what can i make with that for lunch" rather than throwing it away. Anyway - we'll see how I go. Just asking myself the question should start to raise my conciousness.

Day 10 today - setting realistic goals. I think i "got" this more this time around than last time I reas the book. What i have taken away this time is that it is abiut setting ONLY small goals. What I had done before was set a long term goal and then smaller ones - but then i wasn't really excited by the small steps because i always had my eye on the big goal and anything short felt like not really an achievement. So this time around i am going to just set one small goal after another. And my goals will be $1000 reductions in my debt. Total debt right now is $24,521.80. So my first goal is to reduce it to $23,521.80.

Had a quandary today. Petrol tank was empty with the light on but there wasn't any money in the petrol budget. I could probably have hung in there but didn't want to risk running out with kids in the car. So I opted to get a small amount of fuel till there is mroe in the budget and to look for ways to avoid driving as much as possible until it is back undr control. I am content that it was the right call - but i hate that there is a red number in my budget bottom line!

Credits: thinking this all through; working out that i can cope with the car registration that is due this month by paying for 3 months instead of 12 - that way i can avoid drawing on the credit card which i really realky don't want to do

ForMyGirls

Hello coaches,

Day 11 today - in the book it is about learning to tell the difference between hunger, a desire to eat and cravings. In the world of money I see it as learning to tell the difference between a need to spend money, a desire to spend (in a generalised sense) and an intense impulse to buy a specific item.

My plan is to stop and think about what I am thinking and feeling the next few times I have the impulse to spend. No such impulses today as it was a work from home day without any exposure to the capitalist world. But I'm in the office tomorrow - so no doubt there'll be a temptation to analyse!

Credits for the day - doing my ARC and book reading and thinking through how to do this step. Taking the time to post tonight even though it has been a long day and all I want to do right now is watch the telly!