Debt free by 40 -- 19 Months and counting

sweetpea26

Hi Steph. I know how you feel about being left alone. I feel just the same. You are not on your own. So many feel the same. You have achieved so much. Keep going even if it feels like you are treading water. Take care

debtfreewannabe321

Hi Steph, I've had the week from hell, so much so i've added 3 tablets of SJW (St John's Wort) to my 2000mg of AC every day :eek:. I just felt like I was going to snap at any minute last week, then the MIL turned up right in the middle of my melt down week and totally finished me off! I was in tears when she went I just hope that next month the SJW & AC combined make some difference! I hope you're feeling better soon,.....don't disappear, seems there are lots of us on here in the same boat! xx

StressedSteph

So sorry for my outburst yesterday and thank you so much for the replies. I honestly wasn't looking for attention or sympathy I just feel really low at the moment.


I had abit of time last night to sit and think about what is bringing me down lately and what I can do to lessen it, so here are my plans. I am writing them more as a reminder for me so please skip if you can't face the boredom


1) - Stay strong and resist requests to get involved with school PTA.


2) - I am on the committee of a village ladies group (like womens institute), I have ended up arranging most of the events, we have another meeting tonight and I am to sit back and let someone else organise the rest.


3) - Turn off "Chat" on Facebook and avoid being drawn into political conversations about problems at school.


4) - Unfollow various people on Facebook that make me feel inadequate and anxious.


5) - Keep my distance at school events - keep conversations to small talk.


6) - Think positive / Turn negatives into positives.


I know all of the above sounds silly but they are the crux of what I believe is making me feel anxious and low lately.
There is a lot of backstabbing and political issues going on at school and I keep getting sucked into conversation with two women in particular and I sometimes worry that giving my opinion makes me as bad as them and also gets me too involved with what's going on. So turning off FB messenger will help as the leader of the PTA keeps messaging me. Also me trying to be non committal in conversations will be a good start.


I also bit the bullet yesterday and txt the woman whose son I take to school and back if we could share the lift giving abit. I know there is only one term of school left but I am thoroughly fed up with transporting her son everywhere and her getting to sit at home and avoid all of the issues. Its not fair.
She agreed and said we will have to have a coffee and sort it out. I won't let this slide, I plan to get it sorted so that next week onwards she is doing her fair share.


That's about it really. I will put these plans into place and see if it makes me feel abit better.


There is something nice about getting it written down to make you feel abit better.


Hope you are all ok and finding ways to deal with stresses etc.
Big hugs xxx

kelpie35

See, I told you Steph you are a strong young lady.

All these plans are very positive and I know you have the will power to carry them through.

Hope you have a great day, take care. x

maddiemay

Looks like a good plan, it is so easy to be dragged down by these people/situations, don't beat yourself up, most of us get caught from time to time and it takes a huge effort to say NO!

You have thought it out and made your plan, the only way now is up:D

Take care.
MM
xxx

StressedSteph

Thanks Kelpie and Maddie :heartsmil


I have unfollowed & Restricted certain people on FB and also turned off chat.


I am fired up ready to sit back and let others do the organising at the ladies group meeting tonight. I will bite my tongue and have my excuses ready to prevent me doing loads more organising.


I have messaged the chairwoman at the PTA and told her that due to health issues (didn't say mental lol) I am unable to participate in any PTA work. I quit over a year ago but they still try to drag me in. I have done about 5 years worth of work and I calculated we have donated £650 to the school with things we have bought in the past (school sportswear / Orchard trees / Skip hire) so I think I am allowed some peace and quiet now. Haven't had a reply from her yet but expect its because she is annoyed that I am not being suckered into it anymore.

Last job is to make sure I sort the car sharing issue out over the weekend and then just keep my head down.


Had a nice chat to my best friend this afternoon so that was good therapy.


My son has tested my nerves this afternoon having a total meltdown over a caramel bar :mad:. I was in the petrol station, queuing for the cashier when he wanders off to look at stuff, I tried to call him over but he didn't listen. So I went through the till and was about to leave when he realised he still had his caramel bar in his hand and hadn't given it to me to pay.


I had paid by card and had no cash so I couldn't pay for his sweet without drawing £10 out of the cashpoint. I desperately didn't want to do this as that £10 would just get wasted in my purse, so I told him he had to put it back and because he wondered off he had missed his chance. Queue major meltdown....Oh dear....So he has now lost his Xbox rights for the rest of the evening for shouting at me. Kids!!!!


Thankfully I got organised and made a chilli con carne in the slow cooker for dinner, so no stress for me now.


Hope you all had a good day xx

debtfreewannabe321

I hope the chairwoman gets the hint and leaves you alone!

Hugs on the children front, i've had the same today, my ds1 basically told me to F off this morning when I was trying to help him, he's come home in tears though so I don't know whether the latest girlfriend has dumped him, he's nerves are wrought from GCSE madness or what ??? Kids indeed, I never seem to get it right with them.

I hope you have a good evening and manage to chill out just a little. Pizza night here as it was swimming afternoon (which stresses me no end) the chilli you have sounds nicer! xx

mummytogirls

Morning Steph,

I am glad you are getting things order and getting the people told who are taking advantage of your good nature. Well done you, stick to it :T.

Kids are so hardwork aren't they?! DD2 was kicking off at 7am this morning over porridge of all things!!! Just don't want to be dealing with that at 7am haha!! Well actually DH was dealing with it but I could hear every word all the way at the top of the house.

xx

StressedSteph

Morning,


Thanks DFW and MTG, its good to know its not just me dealing with overly dramatic explosions from our children .


Had a lovely weekend, nothing special just pottering about, did three trips to the tip with a jam packed car. Always feels good to get rid of some rubbish. :T.


Not a whole lot to report, finances on YNAB are looking weirdly good and I keep looking to see where I have messed up and calculated something wrong!!. Its says that after all the bills go out I have about £600 spare?. I can't see how that is true BUT I can't find anything wrong with the inputs I have done on YNAB. It won't get spent anyway as I would transfer it all straight into my savings, so at least if I discover I have been an idiot somewhere, I can just move it back .


I managed to sell my daughters Xbox the weekend for £145 so I have transferred that straight into the savings.


Would be really nice to have that big chunk to add to our emergency fund but still doubtful.


I need to package up the Xbox this morning and get Hermes organised to pick it up and then I plan on pegging out some washing and going down the polytunnel.


Tesco's is due between 11-12, otherwise its a quiet day :T


Hope you are all well., will catch up with some diaries later xx

StressedSteph

Ok I have transferred another £200 into the Emergency fund account.


Total now £344.70. :T


Hoping I can transfer another £200 next week, taking me to £544.70. That will get me to just over half way :j