I need some help - its not about money.

Zulu_Dawn

A big thank you to everyone.

I moved out on Saturday and am now staying with family. Clearly things are difficult but the situation is not without hope and I am remaining positive.

I've done the letter thing (thanks) and bought her a small gift. I think we both feel that we need time to recharge and I certainly feel less tired today than I have done recently.

I really hope we can work it out. We had a fairly casual chat with the kids and they are being great at the moment but it is hard not to wake up in the same house as them. Also my wife is in a lot of pain and it is hard to walk away, go to work,etc. knowing that you are the cause of that pain.

Anyway I don't now have internet access other than at work but will try and keep this thread updated.

Best wishes,

ZD

PurpleTeddyBear

ZD -

Huge thanks for the update - have been thinking about you all weekend, and hope things can, in lots of ways, work themselves out.

You're perhaps stronger than you may think.....:T

Take care and keep us update when you can

Love Purps xx :A

Lucy1982_2

Thanks ZD. I was wondering how you had got on.

Keep at it and everything will be fine.

x

Kaz2904

Has your wife ever read any of your posts on here? If you told her your name she could come and have a look and see what you are trying to achieve. She may also not feel so left out IYKWIM?

Storm

I don't know about GA, but I know that AA have a branch called AlAnon which is for family & friends of alchoholics - if GA have something similar she may well benefit from talking to people who have been in the same situation and who have come out the other side too.

I hope everything works out for you both.

Pobby

xgingerx wrote: »

Hi, I know how gambling can become addictive, I currently have a problem with on line poker and if you get chance wouldnt mind u giving me some tips on how to break the habbit which is the road to ruin and in my case lots of debt. (when u sort ur sef out first!)
Iam really moved by your email above and cant imagine how hard this is. Im sorry Im not qualified to give advise but I really wish you all the best and hope that things turn out good for u. I am sure there will be someone who can advise you

All the best

xgingerx[/quot Certainly not wishing to hi jack ZDs post but I will leave a couple of links.

http://www.sfcghub.com/cgsf1.html

http://www.gamcare.com/

http://www.gamblersanonymous.org.uk/

Please feel free to pm me.

saffronflowers

ZD - :hug: and I really really hope it works out.

SFx

GeorgeandDarren

Hi

So sorry about your situation, when I read your initial post, the first thing I thought (as others have said) is to definitely give her the space, but leave a letter for her tonight. In this letter completely take responsibility for what has happened and show her that you have the strength and love to keep the family together and rectify the situation. You will do whatever it takes to keep her and your family as they are the most important things in your life. Your addiction was an illness that you have taken hold of and although the journey will be hard you will get though it. Also say that whatever she decides you will love her forever and you will clear your debts just incase she decides to ever come back (this is just to show your commitment) List all the things you love about her and the reasons you should stay together. The most important thing is not to tell the kids yet. Things have a way of changing and its probably not fair at this stage for your kids to have to go through this.

I really hope everything works out for you, take care

Zulu_Dawn

GeorgeandDarren wrote: »

Hi

So sorry about your situation, when I read your initial post, the first thing I thought (as others have said) is to definitely give her the space, but leave a letter for her tonight. In this letter completely take responsibility for what has happened and show her that you have the strength and love to keep the family together and rectify the situation. You will do whatever it takes to keep her and your family as they are the most important things in your life. Your addiction was an illness that you have taken hold of and although the journey will be hard you will get though it. Also say that whatever she decides you will love her forever and you will clear your debts just incase she decides to ever come back (this is just to show your commitment) List all the things you love about her and the reasons you should stay together. The most important thing is not to tell the kids yet. Things have a way of changing and its probably not fair at this stage for your kids to have to go through this.

I really hope everything works out for you, take care

I wish you had written my letter.;)

We have told the kids. However, we have made it a very casual thing and they seemed to have no problem with things. I'm close by and will see plenty of them both in the coming weeks. We went to the cinema as a family yesterday afternoon which was nice for the kids if a little awkward for my wife and I (..though the big green guy with the funny voice was incredibly annoying as were all those stupid princesses.)

Thank you for your help. I don't have your eloquence but I am very grateful for your advice. I will definitely nick some of this for the future.

Take care,

ZD

toshkininny

only just found this thread and wondered how you were getting on?