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Nice People Thread Number 10 -the official residence of Nice People
Comments
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Sounds like a good set of ideas....much enquiry having been made concerning a gentleman, who had quitted a company where Johnson was, and no information being obtained; at last Johnson observed, that 'he did not care to speak ill of any man behind his back, but he believed the gentleman was an attorney'.0
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Ok, so here's the plan of attack:
1. Speak to my boss. Before Xmas she was talking a out the possibility of a secondment. A job that's a bit less intense might help. Also ask about the possibility of doing 3-4 days a week instead of 5 to allow me some 'me time'. I basically get none of this right now.
2. HR run the advice for people losing the plot line (I think the name might have changed now). I will call that and see what they can do for me.
3. Depending on the outcome of #2, I might also go to the medical centre in the city. There's a small cost but it's not much.
Thoughts...?
Sounds like an excellent plan - a good mix of concrete things to do and flexibility to respond to how things develop. Well done. :TDo you know anyone who's bereaved? Point them to https://www.AtaLoss.org which does for bereavement support what MSE does for financial services, providing links to support organisations relevant to the circumstances of the loss & the local area. (Link permitted by forum team)
Tyre performance in the wet deteriorates rapidly below about 3mm tread - change yours when they get dangerous, not just when they are nearly illegal (1.6mm).
Oh, and wear your seatbelt. My kids are only alive because they were wearing theirs when somebody else was driving in wet weather with worn tyres.
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Sounds okay, Gen, but there is nothing to actually lose by seeing a doctor and they are qualified to help. You are allowed to not be okay, but if we can avoid breaking, we should try every avenue?
Can you afford the time for a proper break for a couple of weeks first, before dropping hours. Give you a chance to take stock, hopefully relax (as it takes time) and hopefully gain some perspective? Reading books on the subject can help you find coping strategies. I think full benefit from a drop in hours would be felt then.
I agree with spirit that beta blockers are less messy than valium. They only stop the physical symptoms of anxiety but also only need to be taken when the anxiety. They work for me because I understand now that my body panics first which then tries to convince my brain that there is something dreadfully wrong. Nothing is as bad as my body likes to tell me. My brain is much better just for the fact that I can stop the cortisol coursing through me. I don't take them regularly, just at a moment I feel I need one.
I'd like to see you with the right doctor. If you had a broken leg, you wouldn't seek help from HR over fixing it, but you would ask them for help coping at work. HR will help you cope at work, Occy health may help with some nice referrals, but a doctor is where you go first when a bit of you is broken for healing. One who will help not just by giving drugs - CBT or EFT even which is gaining ground here.Everything that is supposed to be in heaven is already here on earth.
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Doozergirl wrote: »Sounds okay, Gen, but there is nothing to actually lose by seeing a doctor and they are qualified to help. You are allowed to not be okay, but if we can avoid breaking, we should try every avenue?
Can you afford the time for a proper break for a couple of weeks first? Give you a chance to take stock, hopefully relax (as it takes time) and hopefully gain some perspective? Reading books on the subject can help you find coping strategies.
I agree with spirit that beta blockers are less messy than valium. They only stop the physical symptoms of anxiety but also only need to be taken when the anxiety. They work for me because I understand now that my body panics first which then tries to convince my brain that there is something dreadfully wrong. Nothing is as bad as my body likes to tell me. My brain is much better just for the fact that I can stop the cortisol coursing through me. I don't take them regularly, just at a moment I feel I need one.
Interesting. I didn't know you could take beta blockers intermittently like that.
I'm sure a break from work would be helpful - good suggestion - but he can't have a "proper break" unless there's somebody else available to look after Mrs Gen and the Generalissimos. That's what makes it so difficult when some of the sources of stress are at home rather than at work.Do you know anyone who's bereaved? Point them to https://www.AtaLoss.org which does for bereavement support what MSE does for financial services, providing links to support organisations relevant to the circumstances of the loss & the local area. (Link permitted by forum team)
Tyre performance in the wet deteriorates rapidly below about 3mm tread - change yours when they get dangerous, not just when they are nearly illegal (1.6mm).
Oh, and wear your seatbelt. My kids are only alive because they were wearing theirs when somebody else was driving in wet weather with worn tyres.0 -
Interesting. I didn't know you could take beta blockers intermittently like that.
I'm sure a break from work would be helpful - good suggestion - but he can't have a "proper break" unless there's somebody else available to look after Mrs Gen and the Generalissimos. That's what makes it so difficult when some of the sources of stress are at home rather than at work.
Yes, you can. I did check with Dr again as they had been prescribed that way to me as a teenager. They said absolutely.
All the Gs on a proper holiday, or just Mr and Mrs. This is a family thing, i think they both need a time out. Get off the ride for a bit. Everything that is supposed to be in heaven is already here on earth.
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Doozergirl wrote: »All of them on holiday, or just Mr and Mrs. This is a family thing, i think they both need a time out. Get off the ride for a bit
Its seems to me the craziest thing of the modern western world......we have the workforce opportunity for this yet its not built into our working system.
Most of us benefit from a change of pace now and then, real quality time with loved ones when we need .0 -
What the bleep is wrong with me that I cannot get delicate surfaces masking tape to be delicate enough?
It rips my paint off:(.
I'm trying to do trendy teracotta pink stripes and I'm getting ...oh....Hanson, maybe I should roll with the worn a way Greek pottery look.....going back for another look......
,......
No, just looks pants.0 -
Doozergirl wrote: »All the Gs on a proper holiday, or just Mr and Mrs. This is a family thing, i think they both need a time out. Get off the ride for a bit.
You may be right. Perhaps it is different for couples, even if one of them is depressed. I've never been part of a couple with a depressed person, so I don't know.
For me, though, a holiday with my kids is not a rest. It is harder than being at home. It is just the same old "looking after my kids" without all the people and structures that support me during term time.Do you know anyone who's bereaved? Point them to https://www.AtaLoss.org which does for bereavement support what MSE does for financial services, providing links to support organisations relevant to the circumstances of the loss & the local area. (Link permitted by forum team)
Tyre performance in the wet deteriorates rapidly below about 3mm tread - change yours when they get dangerous, not just when they are nearly illegal (1.6mm).
Oh, and wear your seatbelt. My kids are only alive because they were wearing theirs when somebody else was driving in wet weather with worn tyres.0 -
lostinrates wrote: »Its seems to me the craziest thing of the modern western world......we have the workforce opportunity for this yet its not built into our working system.
Most of us benefit from a change of pace now and then, real quality time with loved ones when we need .
I'm not sure I know exactly what you mean here, although I have a feeling I would agree with it if I did. Could you go into more detail about what workforce opportunity you think there is, and how you think the working system should change?Do you know anyone who's bereaved? Point them to https://www.AtaLoss.org which does for bereavement support what MSE does for financial services, providing links to support organisations relevant to the circumstances of the loss & the local area. (Link permitted by forum team)
Tyre performance in the wet deteriorates rapidly below about 3mm tread - change yours when they get dangerous, not just when they are nearly illegal (1.6mm).
Oh, and wear your seatbelt. My kids are only alive because they were wearing theirs when somebody else was driving in wet weather with worn tyres.0 -
You may be right. Perhaps it is different for couples, even if one of them is depressed. I've never been part of a couple with a depressed person, so I don't know.
For me, though, a holiday with my kids is not a rest. It is harder than being at home. It is just the same old "looking after my kids" without all the people and structures that support me during term time.
The best therapy we could have had was our Christmas holiday. All inclusive, kids club type affair. Didn't lift a finger to housework, didn't worry about finding money for things and didn't have to entertain. I don't think it would have been too different alone, if I were alone. Two weeks self catering, eg, would not have been the same.
There were no break-throughs, just a quiet and a sense of calm that hadn't existed in our house for a very long time. It has come back with us, keeping it will be tough when the memory fades but I presently feel able deal with this year in a way that I definitely have not done in a while.Everything that is supposed to be in heaven is already here on earth.
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