A Singularly Lonely Christmas

bigdaftkid

I too am alone this Christmas. I was so bogged down with the thought of being on my own but having read all the posts on here I now have lots of ideas for what I can do. Thank you everyone for all your positive ideas. Wish I lived nearer Lavenderbees we could have had the day together.

jackyann

Can I gently point out that whilst volunteering is an excellent idea, some organisations may insist on a disclosure & barring certificate (DBC) which isn't really obtainable at short notice.
Some may not insist if you are in a very open situation that can be easily supervised.
So if anyone is reading this who wants to volunteer over Xmas, be prepared, and maybe apply in good time for next year (or just during the year, who knows who you might meet & what you might do!)
Happy Xmas and thank you Fruball for your lovely story!

scaredy_cat

there is an organisation called 'Churches Together' in my town where they do a christmas dinner and they invite people who are on their own or housebound - or anyone really.

With ours they ask you to book your place but i think it is free. i was thinking of going and also offering to pick up anyone close who needed a lift to it as well.

http://www.churches-together.net/Articles/147655/Churches_Together_in/County/Intermediate_County_Bodies.aspx

i think if you google 'churches together' it will show if there are any in your area.

tessie_bear

havent really got any words of wisdom but wanted to offer support to op i would either volunteer or get in some nice food and have a fun me day...rest of the time other than 25th dec lots of things are open as usual
hope u go on ok
tess

minimacka

What about going to see a local pantomine? all the ideas up to now have not involved any money so maybe you could afford to buy yourself and a neighbour a ticket or just go yourself? Take a bag of sweets and have a good laugh? Or maybe invite a work college to go with you before you leave work for Christmas?

What about buying a couple of books to read? your log fire, a drink and a good book sounds pretty perfect to me especially after a lovely walk in the lovely Northumbrian countryside/seaside.

I hope that whatever you do over the Christmas period you have a memorable one.

x

lobbyludd

great thread, with great ideas - see what a positive influence you have been already here Lavender!

you've some great ideas here - and a very long xmas time off! as well as the fun and the functional, volunteering and pampering ideas (and this is only if you are in the right state of mind to cope with it) but a little bit of space from the usual routine could give you a reflective moment to feel proud of getting though a horrible time in your life. New year is the perfect time to do it with the turn of the year, and doing something symbolic like burning candles, or writing down the troubles and fears on paper wrapping them round pebbles and throwing them into the sea on your lovely local beach or writing down goals for the future year and floating them down a river can be a positive way to take stock without getting bogged down emotionally.

and - I'm not sure if this means anything but I spent last christmas day on my own from choice, the kids were at their dad's and I had a lovely day on my own doing exactly what I wanted to do - I know it might feel different when it's a choice, but I wanted to point out that the stuff you have planned isn't a "second best", it can be much better than the portrayal of christmas churned out by the lazy media.

pollypenny

After your opening post you are sounding more positive, OP.

There are some excellent suggestions here. I only have one to add. Is there a theatre near you? They may need volunteer ushers if they are running lots of performances of their pantomime.

Eenymeeny

Loads of good ideas on here. Thanks everyone for the ideas and thanks LavenderBees for posting. You're obviously not the only one in this position.
You mentioned that you had an allotment. A friend of mine 'escapes' (his word!) to the allotment after he's 'done his duty' by having lunch with visiting family members. His wife is quite happy to catch up on gossip with the family and apparently there's quite a party held by 'fellow escapees' with a fire going, and a picnic of whatever they can scavenge from the Christmas goodies! It might be just worth making enquiries what goes on at your allotments over the holidays... If nothing else, you could have a walk out, armed with mince pies or similar, I'll bet there'll be someone ready for a chat, (and what about doing some of those jobs that you've been putting off while you're there?;))
New Year's Eve; last year we attended the carnival in Newcastle City Centre which starts at about 4pm. We were pleasantly surprised by the lovely atmosphere and friendliness showed by everyone. We struck up conversations with people all around us as we waited for it to start and then followed it, up to the fireworks display at the Civic Centre. I'd heartily recommend it!
Just to add an obvious note, you could just ignore the whole Christmas thing if you wanted to you know. I've done it before and just treated it as a day off. Working in retail for years, having one day off between working a late Christmas Eve, followed by the Boxing day sale I felt that I deserved it!
Wishing you the very best, whatever you decide to do.

cosette

jackyann wrote: »

Can I gently point out that whilst volunteering is an excellent idea, some organisations may insist on a disclosure & barring certificate (DBC) which isn't really obtainable at short notice.
Some may not insist if you are in a very open situation that can be easily supervised.
So if anyone is reading this who wants to volunteer over Xmas, be prepared, and maybe apply in good time for next year (or just during the year, who knows who you might meet & what you might do!)
Happy Xmas and thank you Fruball for your lovely story!

This is certainly true in some situations and is worth thinking about. However, a couple of pointers:

Firstly, many volunteering situations do not put volunteers into 'sensitive' situations, there are many many roles which are in the sort of 'open' situations you mention above and where there would be no risk to any potentially vulnerable people.

Secondly, a DBC can be obtained very quickly indeed these days. The last one I obtained, this summer, was very impressive indeed - I did all the form-filling online, popped into the organisation later that day so they could verify my ID, and I my DBC arrived in the post 4 days later. So not entirely impossible for this year.

There are also new rules on transferability of existing CRB/DBC, so this is an option for anyone who has previously volunteered.

If anyone is keen to volunteer this year, I think the key thing is to have a look around now and try to work out which groups might want help and where you think you find want to volunteer, and then to get in touch with them quickly and just take it from there.

Dick_here

Book a cheap flight and a hotel and go somewhere brighter where at least you don't understand all the family street chatter whilst you're walking around enjoying the sights.