A Singularly Lonely Christmas

MummyBobble

Wishing everyone a good start to 2014.

On a very positive note, my lovely DD wanted to give some money to the Guillain Barre Syndrome charity. Five years ago her tennis coach was going out to Africa to work with a children's charity, but was struck down with GBS after one of her vaccinations and has just spent her fourth Christmas in hospital. She is making progress, having been completely paralysed, spent months in intensive care and is still unable to walk but is waiting for funding to be approved to move her out of hospital. I told her that DD wanted to give some money to the GBS charity, she decided to set up a donations page and ask her friends and family to think of ways they might be able to raise funds for GBS research (as she put it, lots of friends raising small amounts adds up!). One day later and she has lots of friends offering to raise money and over £100 donated already! I'm not taking the credit, but it makes me think that one small random act of kindness from DD has made a difference (must take a leaf out of her book and follow her example - bet not many parents say that :j )

Off now to think about what I can do that might be useful (except for the ironing, the mountain is far too big to tackle today :eek: ) Another cup of tea may help, is it too early for chocolate biscuits?

parsniphead

Happy new year to you LavenderBees and everyone else.:beer:

Need2bthrifty

Happy New Year to you all,

What a relief, all I can say is I’m glad it’s all over – much more emotional than I was anticipating. Auld Lang Syne always makes me cry, so I was expecting that at midnight – I thought it was just me but appears it’s a Scottish thing

I settled down to watch the TV only to find at 10.20 a programme all about the song, its origins and how its travelled the world – well that was me away – all bleary eyed and surrounded by tissues by the time the bells rang.

Broomstick, I was right there with you, surrounded by tealights. Then went to open the back door to let the old year out and the new year in, thinking that if the wind was in the right direction I might hear the ships in the harbour sounding their horns, unfortunately all I got was the horrid “whizz-bang” of the neighbourhood fireworks – kinda spoilt the moment.

It’s a much brighter day here weather-wise, can even see some blue sky, which always makes me feel better – so I may just go and search out those walking boots, take them for a few miles walk, drop in for a cuppa with a friend and start the year as I mean to go on.

LB, I hope you had a nice time at the Carnival and with your walking group. Hope the weather has settled down in your area as well and that you get to the beach to skim your stones.

LavenderBees

Happy New Year Everybody! May the best of 2013 be the worst of 2014

I've just been sitting with a cuppa peeling loads of veges, listening again to the R4 You and Yours program from yesterday - link here if you're interested - http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b03mfvlf

I'm too tired to move much today :rotfl: I didn't wake up until much later than normal and so have missed the wee window of weather opportunity to get to the beach...that will happen another day. have made a promise to myself that that will definitely happen.

But I have to say that I am pretty bloomin content as I sit in front of my lovely fire, quietly contemplating what I and we all have achieved together over the last month since I posted my "oh gawd, I need help" thread

I had a really lovely time yesterday - the winter carnival was lovely, unpretentious, lights and fire, and the drums!!...what is it about drums that calls to something so primeval and yearning deep inside me?

Everyone was so good natured, and by sheer fluke, when my friend and I walked behind the procession to the Civic Centre for the firework display, we ended up at the front, right beside the fireworks, so saw the beautiful lower ones as well as those that reached the heady heights of the beautiful dark sky.

I decided not to take photos of anything. Just to "be" in the moment, drinking in the lovely atmosphere. I have to admit to a quiet weep during the fireworks display. So much beauty and for so short a time...it made me think it was a euphemism (sp?) for life. My parents would have loved it, and so I wept...just a little... no one noticed, thank goodness...:o

My meal with my walking pals was good - lovely unchallenging company, and good food at normal prices. Phew! I've started the new year in frugal mode :rotfl:

I was home by 11.30 to another lovely surprise...Main Far Flung Friend had rung while I was out to leave me a lovely message so I didn't come home to an empty house on such a significant evening. That thoughtful little gesture meant the whole world to me :A

But my last challenge for myself was one I set a few days ago, to dance my way into 2014, and for a few moments, I thought I would fail...but, no....there was Gary Barlow on Beeb 1, thank goodness, eh? He's so rarely seen these days....:rotfl: and so I turned my TV up as loud as I dared, and sang and danced my way from sh!te 2013 into brighter 2014 with Gary and then Jules & co. Had me and the furry-purries a lovely wee party until I fell asleep in the delightful company of John Bishop...it's been a while since I had such a handsome man in my boudoir at 2am...:rotfl:

My lovely vitual and real life friends, in the words of the great Gary B, you have all lit the sky up above me for the past month to help me through this so tough month, and better still, helped me rediscover the tools I need to move forward with more confidence and self esteem into 2014. That really is some gift you've bestowed on me.

Thank you!

I'm going to make another cuppa and re-read yesterday's posts so I don't miss any important points...I'll be back...;)

calicocat

Morning...well no afternoon people and Happy New Year...may 2014 bring what we strive for.


Well my guest left this morning, earlier than planned but if i'm honest was more than happy with this. As soon as he was out the door I ran upstairs to shove the onesie on....lol.

It is teaming it down here and had planned to make myself to go to the beach for a walk, but I just don't think it will be a pleasure in this, well not without a dog anyhow.


So I am watching Uncle Buck as I love the bit where he's dancing and cooking those ridiculously huge meals...and the bit where Marcie is dancing, and the bit where he hoovers the dog (I think that's this film)

I'm glad you had a good time LB, and that you had a dance with the cats....that is seriously good Bridget Jones style stuff...and has to be done. And think how much cooler you would have looked doing it in that stylish number I have just bought....(as I did)....lol.


Talking of drums.......i have been trying to work out what a noise has been for the last couple of days, and today have sussed it......some small person has been given a ruddy huge drum kit for xmas!!....and he's not very good at it. when do kids go back to school..???....i am trying to sleep usually during the day. this will be a nightmare. I love drums...but not when i'm sleeping.


I have just roasted a chicken, and plan to make lots of chicken soup with the stock and leftovers......and not a pie as I have been doing recently. So I shall start the year with healthy food as planned.

I have also been dismantling the xmas tree......it has taken over an hour just to get baubles off and wrapped and in a box. Gawd I have got some amount of xmas stuff. Enough to do Fenwicks windows I think.

Another possible resolution would be to not buy anymore...although I think I would fail at this as I love baubles


Right, i'm off to dance with john candy...in my onesie, and against john candy I will look fine..and to do the chicken carcass.

LavenderBees

calicocat wrote: »

I also plan to walk more (was the reason to moving by the beach). I have been here since July and have been to the beach maybe only 7 times. I need to get fitter as this has just disappeared over the last year, and I need it for my job too.


I need to get rid of Credit Card bill over next few months, got a nasty shock when I rang the bank!!....quite depressing, but my own silly fault. so need to get rid of that, throw money at the mortgage (I am quite obsessed about this one so will achieve it provided I don't lose my job) , and also save for next car. I haven't been saving anything since moving and that needs to change.

The plans I had for the house will cost money, and not small amounts, so I maybe need to wait a couple of years to do any of that and see how the other plans go first.



What I used to do was take out from the bank when paid the cash sum I was allowing myself to spend in that month and anything else got saved. I had (still have) various tins etc for different things...food,petrol,going out and can swap it all about when needed, but it focused me on my spending for sure. i'm terrible if i'm just flicking a card out as I just don't keep track....hence no saving since July as was so distracted from the plan needing to buy all the little extras you need when moving....also hence vile...and I mean vile, credit card spend. I should maybe look at what I do when not at work as I do love shopping and need to stop this.

Besides i'd be better if I am going to spend, doing it on herbs and pots for the garden, something useful. Actually i'm forming more of a plan as i'm writing.....So...no going to clothes /housey shops...when need to go out and do something, go herb hunting.



LB I would be very interested as to the types of things you will be putting in the living Will as we briefly discussed....if that's not prying, one time when we meet up.


Oh and my 'learn' something one is growing things now I have a garden, albeit very small.

Lots of really good stuff there, Calicocat.

If I were you, I'd get back to your pots of money for different things as that sounds a really good plan to help focus your mind. By all means, have one for clothes or house or whatever turns you on, but stick within a budgeted amount each month.

Also, I'm guessing that the credit card debt will be costing more than your mortgage, so, I'd be concentrating on getting rid of that as quickly as possible, and then think of saving up overpayments for the mortgage. I can't recommend joining in on the threads for MFW enough, kept me on the straight and narrow, stopped me feeling alone in my quest, and lovely supportive people. Although you can only overpay by 10%, you can save up whatever you want to, to pay off more capital when your mortgage rate ends etc...

Re herb hunting. I did think of getting you some, but wasn't sure whether you want to go this deeply into gardening...so got you a couple of plants instead....but for cheaper gardening, seeds are the way forward for some things... I'll be glad to help you...a pot, bit of compost, a warm conservatory. Before you know it, you'll have plenty of herbs...

As for the living will, I'd be happy to talk this through with you and anyone else who needs to put plans in place, just in case...I've only got as far as 1. keep toxic siblings away and 2. any intravenous drip needs to be linked to a bottle of southern comfort, I want none of this keeping me hydrated malarky :rotfl:

ETA obviously feel free to ignore my unasked for advice. It's just how I would approach it...

LavenderBees

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

Yep...approve those New Year resolutions and have a few of mine.

One of mine is give up "comfort drinking". One hobby I know never to take up is making home-made booze (not at 20p per bottle for home-made wine:eek:). It would be all too easy to down an extra drink or two at that price. At least, at £4.50 for a bottle of cheapest plonk then the cost alone is a bit of a deterrent. Nerves calming down a bit from having moved from a city, but there's still the "oh heck" moment that gets soothed by a drink or two as regards the renovation work I am doing on the house I recently moved to. Yesterday's "oh heck" moment on the house boiled back down to having received my monthly bank statement and I can see I'm ripping through my savings at a rate of knots on the work on this house and I am worried I may not have enough money to even get it basically finished (I'd already given up hope of getting it completely finished in the foreseeable future). Waaah...and may not even have enough money to finish getting it decorated throughout (courtesy of "those things the vendor didn't mention:cool::(" causing unexpected bills). All hints from anyone on abolishing the comfort drinking will be welcome to many of us I'm sure. I'm finding the thought of the money its costing me isn't a sufficient disincentive on its own (despite having retired at my retirement age of 60 and knowing my "Revised State Pension Age" is over a year away and so I'm having to live on about half pension for a while yet:eek: and am not at all sure that I'm not taking out a bit of my savings to subsidise that half pension whilst I wait to get through the "gap" and get the rest of my income again).

So I know my drive me to drink Danger Points and that's having the house in a state (temporary fortunately)/money problems/phonecalls with my mother (as she isn't an easy person to deal with...even at the end of a phone). What are everyone else's and what strategies do you use to deal with them?

Weight to lose = yep = me too. About 2 stones to lose and am resolutely refusing to buy any new clothes I can possibly help because I have plenty of clothes (ie in my correct size).

Learn Welsh, if only because I'm nosy and want to understand everything going on around me:rotfl: and half the conversations here are incomprehensible to me at the moment. They all switch to English promptly when I hove into view, so I'm just thinking "If they can speak such perfect English, then I ought to be able to manage at least reasonable Welsh". Anyway..if Wales does break away from England at some point I'd better know my Welsh well by then...

Take up some voluntary work. I have a nascent community project in mind that looks like it might need volunteers and hopefully its one where I wont have to resign myself to being cold all the time (my experience of voluntary work to date indicating that thermal undies and fingerless gloves are de rigeur, because the surroundings are almost uniformly cold:().

Sorry, but the only way I can think of to stop comfort drinking is to not buy any or have any in the house. I'm guessing avoiding your stressors isn't an option??

I can certainly sympathise about the costs of doing up a house. Yours sounds full on. My own house is comfy but worn, a bit like me :rotfl:. I've been here 8 years now, and am only just starting to do some home improvements. I started on the outside this year, to start to get it weather proof. Replaced rotten porch windows at my front, and my back porch (rotten wood) is being knocked down and a new one built next month (weather permitting). Trouble is that this year has unexpectedly depleted my savings so, a bit like you, I am going ahead with the work, but feeling anxious about it. I don't feel comfortable at all. But the builder and joiner have ordered the materials, so I will go ahead, and will just hope that nothing happens before I build up some savings again. Hence, my need for some strict frugal resolutions.

I also noticed the other day that there are some roof tiles overhanging the gutter at the back...so will need the builder to take a look at my roof while he is here doing the porch, and if he's on the roof, he may as well check my chimney stack...

If I can get to the end of the year, and know my house is pretty weather proof, then I'll be happy, and then I'll be frugal next year to start to save for the more essential internal improvements...

Best of luck with yours. Do let me know how you get on...

LavenderBees

MummyBobble wrote: »

Love reading plans for next year. I don't enjoy New Year, so many folk (me included) focus on next year being better than the last and forget about any good things that have happened in the last year. 2013 has been dreadful though, so I am turning my back on it and moving on, looking forward not back, and appreciating what I have. 2014 may not be "my year" (lived long enough to know that doesn't happen, there's always something comes along to scupper the best laid plans...) but it will be what I make it which will be the best it can be for me, my children and good friends :A

So :beer: to you all and let's look forward to some happy times xx

Good for you, MummyBobble, you go for it! :T. Hope today has gone ok for you with the kids being with your ex. Are you pampering yourself? Hope so...

LavenderBees

calicocat wrote: »

Exercise.....can be a bit of a stumbling block for me as I find it pretty tedious and boring. I used to do kick boxing and loved that as we had a right laugh doing it. I need to be either doing something like that, or walking with a friend etc and to be chatting about stuff, as if I pick something i'll get bored with i'll dump it.
Hmmmm...I will have to think about what I will do to get fitter. Of course if I didn't have to work for a living I would have a dog..exercise would be sorted.

Bad nasty work...lol.

To be honest cutting out the vino will be (taking a worst week or one where i've been out too) probably 2000 calories a week...if i've got it right that a bottle is say 1000.

When we can coincide weekends off, let's be walking buddies to motivate ourselve - beaches, we have the loveliest in the world (no exaggeration :rotfl:) and just outside my backdoor are lovely walks in countryside too.

I can also send you my walking groups walks...some you won't be able to make as you'll be working, but some you may like the look of.

I've tried classes and gyms, and so quickly lose motivation. Give me fresh air and good company any day. I get home, tired but happy, pour myself a drink...:rotfl:

LavenderBees

paulineb wrote: »

Around 600 cals in a bottle of wine easily. Thats just an estimate, some are lower, some are higher. Higher the alcohol percentage, higher the calories.

Becks blue only has 0.05 per cent alcohol a bottle, same as kaliber. An ordinary bottle of becks has 100 cals a bottle.

Off for the last workout of 2013 and Im having a takeaway later and there will be chips. The difference between this year and last for me is that I didnt sit at christmas stuffing my face because it was christmas. Theres nothing wrong with that, but because I had been eating healthily I was thinking will I just have a couple of days off and eat a lot. In the end, I had a few chocs, a couple of glasses of perry and a curry and some chips.
Couldnt be bothered sitting working my way through a family sized bag of crisps just for the sake of it, the takeaway was enough of a treat.

On the my fitness pal you can log cals in and out, theres a database of food and alcohol with cal counts attached, its also free to use and you can download it on your iphone as well.

I know a lot of people have sworn by the hairy dieters cookbooks, they cook favourite dishes in a lower cal way. You can get them for the kindle as well.

Hope you enjoyed your chips

Someone last night was talking about how lovely the HD's cookbook recipes are. I'm thinking of treating myself as I have some Amazon vouchers begging to be spent. In fact, I'm glad you've reminded me. I'm off to look now