Mrs PG's Hopes & Dreams for a debt free future !

PinotGrigio41

debtfreewannabe321 wrote: »

what a great run of luck on the competitions!!! Fab news

Take care xx

Now I need to win a few exotic holidays and I will be a very happy Mrs PG !!

Hope you are ok DFW xxx

PinotGrigio41

I am ashamed to say that I STILL haven't caught up on one solitary diary, which is very embarrassing.

I quickly log on ,write my nonsense, update the PG National Debt then trundle off again.

The news here is that I have cleared some arrears in the past week, made a reasonably chunky payment to THEM and we possibly have picked up a nice new three month contract workwise.

I was beginning to panic as current one ends next week when Mr PG lands home and we were back to what we class as "bread and butter" work. I am keeping my fingers, toes and anything else I can think of crossed that this will come off.

DD1 has picked up some photography work for a couple of weeks time !! She is over the moon. It is unpaid, but will look fab on her CV and she gets free festival tickets into the bargain ! I just need to suss out the sleeping arrangements ! I will need to keep guard to the entrance of her tent while she sleeps or I will drive back and forth to collect her, bring her home to sleep then take her back again at all sorts of unearthly hours, no rest for the wicked then !

DD2 played H0rseBall yesterday, and had the time of her life. I had never heard of it and thought it was a made up game until I googled it last night and realised that there is a National Association of H0rseball !!! Best I learn he rules I think, as she loved it !

Mr PG and I are going to take a week off. Well a week still glued to phones and emails, but not with him disappearing out of the house for silly amounts of hours. Essentially that will be the best break we have this year, the perils of being self employed I suppose. I am hoping that we can escape for a few days as I really really need to get away, although Im sure all he wants to do is be at home, having been gone pretty much since May !! We will need to compromise I think !

I did try and take the girls camping at the weekend, ie the car was loaded ready to go, still is infact. I needed to get away from the "other stuff" but ultimately as usual the guilt trip was laid on me with such ferocity and nastiness that it reduced me to tears and we didn't go. I'm not sure how much longer this can go on. A similar thing happened yesterday and its making me so miserable and stressed. The bottom line is it is very apparent that I am not allowed to do anything nice for myself, the girls , see friends or anything that makes me slightly happy. If I choose to do these things I have to do them with that person, the money I have spent on her to keep her entertained is off the scale and its all of us that are going without. I am wondering when I am allowed a break and for my life to resume as best as possible. This has been going on for 11 months now and as much as I know its wrong and unacceptable I dont know how to break the cycle as the nastiness awful. I really really do have every sympathy that things must be difficult but I cant change whats happened. The only comfort I have is that if my dad could see whats going on and the wreck she has reduced me to he would be angry beyond belief.

Anyway I have informed them I have no time to go today due to work and I also have a windscreen being fitted on Mr PGs car . Sadly the only other family member that visits has gone on holiday therefore the entertainment / visiting / phone calls etc are solely on my doorstep . The girls are good and do call, text and come with me but they can only deal with so much. Her grown up adult married grandchildren don't even pick up the phone let alone visit.My girls are doing far far more. I am getting so bogged down in the expectations that its taking over our entire life.

Oh god I have gone off on a rant again. I think I need to see someone !!

I will shut up now ! Sorry !!! xxx:o

pennywisepoundstupid

Hi PG, I'm so sorry things are not getting easier regarding family members, please please take care of yourself and your girls and remember your dad wouldn't want you to be unhappy, IT IS OK TO BE SELFISH SOMETIMES AND PUT YOURSELF FIRST.

If you need to vent pm me.x.

PinotGrigio41

pennywisepoundstupid wrote: »

Hi PG, I'm so sorry things are not getting easier regarding family members, please please take care of yourself and your girls and remember your dad wouldn't want you to be unhappy, IT IS OK TO BE SELFISH SOMETIMES AND PUT YOURSELF FIRST.

If you need to vent pm me.x.

Thankyou so much Pennywise xxx

I feel really guilty now ,I shouldn't have written all that, its just popped out. xx

pennywisepoundstupid

It popped out because you needed to get it out of your system, you can't be expected to carry everything on your shoulders, don't feel guilty you have nothing to feel guilty for.

Would your DH be prepared to step in, just asking because when things became difficult a few weeks ago for me when that family member found me I sat down with my DH and told him I needed him more than ever to back me up if things kicked off and that if it came to it he might have to be the one to deal with the person. Luckily it didn't come to this and they didn't get in touch again even though they are still in the country but I know if anything happens he will deal with it for me.

Mara_uk7

PG, Please put yourself and your family first for once, Ive been in your position, and its so wearing, you end up really resenting the family member. Send a message to the older grown up grandkids, tell them you are going away and will not be able to visit for a fortnight ... even if youre only away for two nights. Tell the relative the same thing, and stay firm, you will feel a weight off your mind.
Please please have a break before you end up strangling her !

alioops78

Mrs PG sorry to read that the issues are still continuing and it's definitely not fair to fall on your shoulders nor your girls.

Is there any chance of contacting the local council to see if they would be able to visit and possibly arrange something like a befriending service or something. At my council it's a free service where people will visit for a few hours and it's company for the people that need it. Might be worth a shot as if you keep going it's going to end up blowing up somehow and I know that you'll feel worse if it gets to that point and yes you should also contact someone for help for you.

Sorry if it's a bit preachy but YOU need to take care of YOU and your girls.

Massive hugs

satchmo1

I agree that you need to ringfence time for you and your girls/DH. Tell the succubus that your family are away, and ensure you don't get guilt-tripped into anything for that time. Don't answer the phone.


Don't answer the phone.


I'm feeling drained today as mum is increasingly losing her confidence to do everyday tasks. Bathing, keeping track of medication, preparing meals, being on her own. I've taken her to a dressing clinic, to her GP, and sourced and collected a folding wheelchair today. She will sleep for hours in the daytime, and it's tempting to plan to get out during that time, but I can't be sure when that will be.


She goes to bed at 9pm, but then is awake at silly o'clock in the night and is constantly in and out of the bathroom. It disrupts me and DH's sleep, so that means its harder to cope in the daytime.


What happens if I am offered the job I was interviewed for (30 hours)? I can't really afford not to work.

apple_muncher

Fingers, toes and everything else crossed for when dd1's results come out. Hope she is pleased with them. x

apple_muncher

Hope all is well in the PG house. Thinking of you x