Real-life MMD: My pregnant bridesmaid needs a new dress - who pays?

ShowmetheMoney

Happened to me with my bridesmaid. Just went back to the shop with the original dress and receipt, and even though it was beyond the 28 days, they were so understanding and let me swap for a bigger size. This was Monsoon btw.

Prothet_of_Doom

!!!! her off ! Give the dress to someone that it fits, and don't invite her to the wedding either.

DigForVictory

MY family regard having a pregnant woman at the wedding as a sort of fertility rite. It's proven effective amongst our lot & takes the bulging lassie's mind off D-day for a while.
We'd trade in the exisiting dress for something matronly (& expanding), & go for it! We'd also arrange an extra photo - of bride & matron.

She's pregnant - if you can afford to be generous & tolerant, please do so. If you can't, explain this & sell tickets for bridezilla vs. pregnancy hormones...

You can't win per se, so you may as well roll with the punch.

axa

Anyone who's mad enough to spend that amount of money on one day rather than a deposit for a house i or to nvest it for their children's future can afford a new dress. You asked asked her to be bridesmaid after all .
Although if I was her I'd be apalled that you're so obsessed with your own wedding that the fact She is pregnant has been seen as an inconvenience rather than the happy thing it is, get your priotitiesr sorted.

nczm

Maybe it's insensitive but I presume the baby was planned for... as part of the planning she should have budgeted a replacement bridesmaid dress or stepping down (at which point it is your choice to pay and keep her). I don't think she should be demanding that you pay, you've been a very generous bride for stumping up for the dresses in the first place.

msm019

This is an interesting one - when my sister got married 2 years ago, the dresses for us were bought in the December before as it was the only dress she'd seen in the colour she wanted. I had to get the largest size they did and when it was bought I didnt fit it - but on teh day of the wedding I did although we were talking about taking it to the dressmaker to get something done if I didnt.

With her dresses we all went 50:50 and thats what I'll be doing for my wedding in a couple of years time once we've booked it.

Buying the dresses early is pretty normal though - and whilst things do change there's normally a solution.

How about seeing if you can return or sell the original and if you can put the money towards the new one? If you cant, you might need some tact and suggest going 50:50 on a new one or do as soem of the others have suggested and either make her matron of honour or involve her in the ceremony in some other way e.g doing a reading etc.

The biggest thing you're going to need to do is talk to her about it though - there will be a solution.

Good luck!
Mx

millysg1

this happened to me last year. We found out 4 months before the wedding that my maid of honour was preganant (unplanned). she was so worried about telling me but i was just pleased for her. Yes, it added stress of sorting out a second dress last minute that needed fitting only a week before the wedding to make it fit, and yes it involved spending £100 more than i had planned or budgetted for. But i wanted her as my bridesmaid and she would of stepped down if i had an issue. But her there as my bridesmiad meant enough to me for me to economise in other areas to get her a dress.

duchy

axa wrote: »

Anyone who's mad enough to spend that amount of money on one day rather than a deposit for a house i or to nvest it for their children's future can afford a new dress. You asked asked her to be bridesmaid after all .
Although if I was her I'd be apalled that you're so obsessed with your own wedding that the fact She is pregnant has been seen as an inconvenience rather than the happy thing it is, get your priotitiesr sorted.

BIG Asss....ump tigon there. You have no idea if the bride and groom have already bought their home or not....or if they have made provision for children who may not be born yet.......or indeed you are also presuming the OP wants or can have children. What a lot of conclusion jumping

tain

Depends how you're approaching your wedding really.

A lot of people these days seems to have the attitude that because they're getting married, everyone else should be happy to pay hundreds and hundreds to celebrate it with you. If you're one of these people, then feel free to ask the bridesmaid to stump up the cash. You're getting married, so she should be happy to pay for the privilege of being your bridesmaid.

If you can't afford it, then talk to her about your options.

If you're just a bit miffed that she didn't consider you when she was having sex, then either get a new bridesmaid, have one less bridesmaid, or pay for the dress to be altered/buy a new dress.

Augustus_the_Strong

Actually, thinking about this a bit further... If she EXPECTS you to buy her a second dress, then you should ditch her and find a new bridesmaid (preferably the same size).