We’d like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum.
This is to keep it a safe and useful space for MoneySaving discussions. Threads that are – or become – political in nature may be removed in line with the Forum’s rules. Thank you for your understanding.
📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!
When people say...don't bring anything...

victory
Posts: 16,188 Forumite
for xmas, for when we stay there, OH are debating what that actually means?
We are not doing presents this year, simples:D they have said, we have said, so that is perfectly clear but then you go into the mindfield of 'oh don't bring anything' I am taking a box of chocs that says Thank you on the boxing, was going to take champagne for the day but have been told no, then OH says 'is that all your taking?' so I added quality street tin and chocs to munch on but others have said 'why are you taking those, it's not as if they asked you to and they will probably have some there'
Can't win, now OH says have some presents wrapped up 'just in case' as he doesn't want to be embarrased, jeez might as well just bring it all:eek:
So, when people say for a xmas stay ' oh don't worry, don't bring anything, do they actually mean absolutely nothing or just a bit of something?':rotfl::D
We are not doing presents this year, simples:D they have said, we have said, so that is perfectly clear but then you go into the mindfield of 'oh don't bring anything' I am taking a box of chocs that says Thank you on the boxing, was going to take champagne for the day but have been told no, then OH says 'is that all your taking?' so I added quality street tin and chocs to munch on but others have said 'why are you taking those, it's not as if they asked you to and they will probably have some there'
Can't win, now OH says have some presents wrapped up 'just in case' as he doesn't want to be embarrased, jeez might as well just bring it all:eek:
So, when people say for a xmas stay ' oh don't worry, don't bring anything, do they actually mean absolutely nothing or just a bit of something?':rotfl::D
0
Comments
-
I take a bottle of wine if they are not teetotal. I say ' I know you have everything covered but this can go down for some time in the new year for you two to enjoy together '.0
-
It is a mind field but normally if I go somewhere where they say don't bring anything I always take a bottle of wine or something similar as a thank you.
I'd go for the chocolates and champagne as they can enjoy them when they get some peace after Christmas.0 -
0
-
If you have all agreed to no pressies and they wont accept the champagne then a box of chocs is perfectly acceptable. No need at all to cause yourself stress by looking for something additional to take ~ its no pressies, remember?0
-
They said no to the champers, got some, don't need anymore apparently, but settled for the thank you on the box chocs, that is a nice gesture:D
You're not really supposed to ask, just show up with a bottle. It'll never go to waste, if they don't want it themselves they can take it to somebody else's house who they visit next year.0 -
When I am told, 'just turn up' I always take something along the lines of wine, choccies, flowers.
Those cover just about everything.!!
Enjoy yourself.Breast Cancer Now 100 miles October 2022 100 / 100miles
D- Day 80km June 2024 80/80km (10.06.24 all done)
Diabetic UK 1 million steps July 2024 to complete by end Sept 2024. 1,001,066/ 1,000,000 (20.09.24 all done)
Breast Cancer Now 100 miles 1st May 2025 (18.05.2025 all done)
Diabetic UK 1 million steps July 2025 to complete by end Sept 2025. 1,006,489 / 1,000,000 (10.09.25 all done)
Breast Cancer Now 100 miles 1st October 2025 82/100Sun, Sea0 -
Take stuff that makes your Xmas that they won't have in. There's nothing worse than a visitor moaning about the fact that the host hasn't got XYZ for them to eat ..... e.g. people wanting/expecting ham for tea in the house of a vegetarian. Your favourite drinks, sweets, nibbles.
That way, when they offer you those nasty German shiny nibbles from Lidl/Aldi you can at least say "no thanks" and whip out your own Walkers crisps
Because you say "staying" and not visiting for a few hours - it's a long time to go without your preferred seasonal treats.0 -
I think there is a difference between presents (which neither of you want) and what I would class as token contributions to the day eg champagne/wine/chocolates. If they don't get consumed on the day there will always be Boxing Day and New Years Eve for their use.0
-
I'm a gigantic pessimist, and whenever someone says, "Don't bring anything", I always think they mean, "We expect you to bring something, but we want to seem modest and polite by telling you not to bother." Then when you turn up with nothing, they are very annoyed.
This happened once and we thought, we can't just bring nothing, so we took a bottle of white wine. Good job we did, as the couple involved hadn't bought any white wine and were pretty much expecting us to bring it (despite saying not to bring anything) and had bought no white, people were waiting for us to arrive with it!!!!!0
This discussion has been closed.
Confirm your email address to Create Threads and Reply

Categories
- All Categories
- 352.1K Banking & Borrowing
- 253.5K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
- 454.2K Spending & Discounts
- 245.1K Work, Benefits & Business
- 600.7K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
- 177.4K Life & Family
- 258.9K Travel & Transport
- 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
- 16.2K Discuss & Feedback
- 37.6K Read-Only Boards