How to help my OH with his guilt over stolen car?(Long-sorry!)

chocdonuty

Not sure barricading the outside door is sensible, if, heaven forbid you needed to get out quickly due to a fire or other emergency then its highly dangerous, equally so if someone needed to get in.

shop-to-drop

Were the house keys on the bunch? If so, I'd definitely change the locks. Unlikely they'd return but not unheard of, I'd not want to take a chance.

whitewing

As a last ditch effort, he could try contacting the local paper and see if they will do a little article. The thief may feel guilty enough to let you know where it is, especially if it was opportunistic.

Someone I know found theirs abandoned in a country lane. Ours got nicked years ago and was dumped outside a school. (They ate my butterscotch though - that bag of sweets was probably worth more than the car itself)

nom_de_plume

It sounds as if OH has taken this rather badly and, as well intentioned as the suggestions are, telling him to 'snap out of it' may actually make him worse rather than better.

lostinrates is on the money in my book.

Jonboy_1984

Changing locks on a DIY basis would probably cost around £10 a lock or with lost keys involved may be a home insurance job? This simple practical step may stop some of his worries?

dandelionclock30

How do you make out thats highly possible? the key being left in the ignition by the theif?. A key could have been taken out of your pocket or you bag whilst you walked along and you didnt realize it was gone of course. Also a visitor or family member or child could have taken it from your house. A whole host of possibilities.
You are having a laugh thinking that people would tell the truth, maybe 1 in 500 or so thats it.

[Deleted User]

Instead of castigating himself about something he can't change.., could he look at it as an example of how much he cares.., so his memory of the event is less 'blaming'.

While no one would want to have a car stolen, the fact that he left the keys in the car, while attending to his son, shows how overwhelmingly he cares for his children. He couldn't think of anything else.

I don't see that there's anything reprehensible about that. In fact I'd give him a big hug. Looking at it this way won't change the loss of the car, but it might help him.

lostinrates

dandelionclock30 wrote: »

How do you make out thats highly possible? the key being left in the ignition by the theif?. A key could have been taken out of your pocket or you bag whilst you walked along and you didnt realize it was gone of course. Also a visitor or family member or child could have taken it from your house. A whole host of possibilities.
You are having a laugh thinking that people would tell the truth, maybe 1 in 500 or so thats it.

Maybe.

Op you husband is one in 500 according to this post.. Lucky you I say, if that is the case. Lucky , lucky you.

I know who I would rather live with and be.

I think most of us here would shake your caring husband by the hand for his actions and honesty.

duchy

I left the front door and carkeys in plain view through a window - they broke in grabbed the keys and took off in the car. Worst thing was they spooked the cat and she disappeared for four days.

Cat apart -it's only a car - and yes I do think if it is more than 3 days and he's not calming down he needs to speak to victim support (and also change the locks if his doorkey was on the same ring). Must admit I'd give a couple of days of sympathy and then expect him to at least start getting a grip and I wouldn't feed the flames. It's a bit daft if he's baracading you in rather than changing the locks though-Just shows his perception is still a bit off.

HPoirot

Lucky 499 other people too if it is the case that their insurers don't call for CCTV investigation of where and where their cars are taken. Or plain foolhardy.