Real-life MMD: Party-pooping payment request - should I pay up?

michaels

woah - now there is an idea, rather than it costing a few hundred to spring for DKs parties with a bit of cashback/negotiation with the venue we could actually turn it into a money making venture

Round here kids parties cost several hundred quid to put on and no one has ever suggested charging the guests and following on from my tongue in cheek answer above, we definitely wouldn't want to be the first to try it....

jaxsmar

I wonder what would happen if the parents didn't get enough children to attend... would the party be cancelled or changed? What sort of party is it? come off it 8 kids = £200 so basically all the parent chip in £25.00 pay for the birthday boy/girls party.. and then the parents have hardly paid for anything, then possibly buy the birthday kiddie an expenses birthday present?????? ... My daughter went to a party in London to see Wicked travel was paid for sweets and a small meal and the parents wouldn't take any money.... I would have paid £25.00 for her, the experience would be worth it! Only you can decide but if it is a normal party NO I wouldn't pay unless it was her best friend.

sugarbaby125

I would politely decline. Charging a child to attend your son or daughter's birthday party is outrageous. I have four children and four grandchildren and I and my older 2 children have only ever done birthday parties in our homes, with lovely goody bags for the children who attend and a fun filled day with music and laughter, that was within the budget of the parent hosts. This is a trend I would never buy into!!!!

BNT

Doesn't sound like an invite so much as an offer to provide services for a fixed charge. The money part of the dilemma is easy: can I afford it? Is it worth it?

The moral part is harder. I don't think there is anything inherently immoral about charging someone to entertain their kids, but it does seem highly inappropriate to get others to pay for your own party.

Personally, I'd politely decline.

juliamarsh

jon81uk wrote: »

Need more information to make a decision. If it is worth £25 (such as Go-Karting, Alton Towers, Go Ape etc) and your son really wants to go then it is worth paying for.
If it is just a meal or then really not worth it. Think about whether you would normally pay that much for the day out being offered.

If I was holding a birthday party at home or a reasonable price place out (McDonalds, Pizza Express) then I wouldn't expect guests to pay. But for something expensive such as Alton Towers, Go Karting etc the a contribution to the cost would be expected

I agree with this - my children sometimes got asked to do things like this and I was prepared to pay for them to go. Personally if I were hosting it I would rather limit the number of guests and pay for the costs myself than ask parents to pay, but in this situation I wouldn't feel offended if I was asked to contribute to the cost.

gaily

It does say £25 for 2 parties, not just 1. I am assuming it is a split cost, rather than for each individal party.

I have twin boys who get invited to the same parties most of the time. After costs of presents (vitally important as a child) transport, my buying coffee (and maybe a sneaky slice of cake) at the venue, I would not be happy to pay for a party, unless super special, or a very close friend - and would want to be in the know beofre the invites came out, so i'd have cleared the costs with the parents before the kids started on the emotional blackmail.

mendipgirl

I would give the child a lovely birthday card, tell the parents you are otherwise engaged, and then take your child out for a small but fun treat instead. Asking £25 plus present etc is ridiculous. When we've done 'expensive' parties we've footed the bill - when short of cash we've done a home version and got creative. Now my son is in his teens - it's the latter option! Friends, a dvd, pizza - in fact singing along to Mamma Mia will go down in history!

mendipgirl

"contribution to the cost would be expected" - how times have changed. If it was my child's party I wouldn't expect any financial contribution at all.

mendipgirl

You have put it succinctly...getting others to pay for your party is ...erm...a little odd!

alanq

gaily wrote: »

It does say £25 for 2 parties, not just 1. I am assuming it is a split cost, rather than for each individal party.

It says "I don't want my son to be left out, but £25+, plus a present ...". Are you also assuming that one present is for two parties?