Husband has to give up job to look after me

Hannahxxx

I am seven weeks pregnant with a three and a half year old girl who goes to school (free). I live in wales my husband has a job but has been on unpaid leave to look after me as I am bed bound with hyperemisis bowel disease and other medical probs.
I was assured I was well enoughh to have a baby but we all get sick sometimes I suppose.
He is going to have to leave work and we are going to have to live with a possible 26 week sanction to benifits- fair enough if that's the rule.
But how do we do it?
There is £475 in the bank and I own the home no mortgage.
We have an income and expenditure of around 1000£
I don't eat much so it's just two mouths to feed really
I have thought of trying to do the following
Buy all value food and get local veg
Get milk and fruit vouchers
Try and cancel sky
Water meter
Electric and gas meters as I am petrified of a bill
Put my wood and coal fire on
Get clothes and toys from charity shops
Batch cook - teach him
Any other ideas?

paulineb_2

Theres no alternative to him leaving his job?

quidsy

Could he not sty in work & use some salary to pay soeone to come in & help every day?

This_Year

Do check your entitlements to benefits and make sure that you're claiming everything that you're entitled to.

http://www.entitledto.co.uk/

Anoneemoose

Hannahxxx wrote: »

I am seven weeks pregnant with a three and a half year old girl who goes to school (free). I live in wales my husband has a job but has been on unpaid leave to look after me as I am bed bound with hyperemisis bowel disease and other medical probs.
I was assured I was well enoughh to have a baby but we all get sick sometimes I suppose.
He is going to have to leave work and we are going to have to live with a possible 26 week sanction to benifits- fair enough if that's the rule.
But how do we do it?
There is £475 in the bank and I own the home no mortgage.
We have an income and expenditure of around 1000£
I don't eat much so it's just two mouths to feed really
I have thought of trying to do the following
Buy all value food and get local veg
Get milk and fruit vouchers
Try and cancel sky
Water meter
Electric and gas meters as I am petrified of a bill
Put my wood and coal fire on
Get clothes and toys from charity shops
Batch cook - teach him
Any other ideas?

Hi. I have no idea of your illnesses but is your husband leaving work due to the bowel disorder as well as the hyperemesis? In the sense that if you weren't pregnant and suffering hyperemesis, would he need to care for you because of your bowel illness?

The reason I ask is because if it is more due to the hyperemesis which will be temporary, then would it be better for him to stay in work and you pay for a 'carer'. I will be honest and say I don't know the logistics or cost of such a thing and of course, I don't know your husband's income. Maybe you have already considered this?

All of the suggestions you have posted are good ideas though. The only one I would add is if you have anything to sell, get it on eBay or similar. Then you can use the proceeds to fund some of the things you mention.

peachyprice

That seems a bit extreme, you're only 7 weeks, that doesn't mean that the HG is going to remain for the whole pregnancy, it could pass just as quickly as it came.

And surely you knew about your other illnesses before you became pregnant what plans had you already made to cope?

LeeSouthEast

With no mortgage to pay, £1000/month outgoings seems very high?

lostinrates

I'm not familiar with your condition OP, but will it impact on you long term?


I have chronic health conditions and for various reasons one of my parents moved in with us last year. This means we can provide 'mutual' care....parent is well, but needs some help sometimes, I am not well and have found losing my independence extremely difficult.

Do you have another relative who might be able to consider a care role? Or more than one who might each be able to do a little bit?

Lunar_Eclipse

So sorry to hear you are very unwell.

It would probably be better financially to hire a carer, especially if this is a relatively short term need.

One thought I had in terms of funding your living expenses, though on the face of it is seems financially nonsensical (but you need to have money to eat etc) is to remortgage your house. (A mortgage being the cheapest form of debt available.) You would have monthly mortgage payments to make, but would have money to live off. It's not an ideal option, but if you really have no other options, it might be one to consider - before your husband gives up his job, or you won't qualify.

On the face of it, I really think your husband should keep his job.

Hannahxxx

Thank you for your suggestions. We have looked into carers nurserys childminders etc I had no idea I would get this ill and was advised I was well enough to try for another child I wouldn't have considerd it otherwise. I suppose your right I could just manage somehow I do not feel my daughter would get very good care from me

Lunar_Eclipse

Do you have any family that could help? Have you spoken to your doctor about any community carers that might be available?

You will manage somehow, but I hate to think of someone being really ill and struggling to the point where they really shouldn't/can't get out of bed and yet looking after a little one.

Fingers crossed something brilliant will work out for you. xxx