Dealing with diffcult toddler

ognum

I also remember this well, I was at my wits end and my only consolation was my daughter only did this at home not out.

Move on many years and she is a Peadiatrician! An expert on kids! She is single minded and able, she needed the strength in her personality to get where she is.

So, take a deep breathe, do your best and understand that we should not tale all the spirit out of our kids!

meritaten

I think 2 is a little young for reward and punishment - she wont understand the sticker system and 'waiting' for her reward.
same with naughty step - I would start this at about three yrs old.
with 2 yr olds I would just either distract her or remove her from situation. Don't let the temper tantrums 'get' to you - just go about your business and let her get on with it, as long as she isn't about to come to harm. and if its in public? so what - your parenting style is no one elses business!
with my youngest if he 'kicked off' in public, then OH would take him out to the car where we kept some toys. Then me and the other two would carry on shopping. if this isn't possible then grit your teeth and carry on!

notanewuser

meritaten wrote: »

I think 2 is a little young for reward and punishment - she wont understand the sticker system and 'waiting' for her reward.
same with naughty step - I would start this at about three yrs old.
with 2 yr olds I would just either distract her or remove her from situation. Don't let the temper tantrums 'get' to you - just go about your business and let her get on with it, as long as she isn't about to come to harm. and if its in public? so what - your parenting style is no one elses business!
with my youngest if he 'kicked off' in public, then OH would take him out to the car where we kept some toys. Then me and the other two would carry on shopping. if this isn't possible then grit your teeth and carry on!

Didn't that teach him that it was worth making a fuss? Boys/men (generally) hate shopping and you played right into his hands.

It's for this reason that DD's room doesn't have toys in it.

nearlyrich

I have two grown up children and I can't remember any really bad tantrums but I used to babysit a 6 year old (when I first knew her) who was like a toddler when she didn't get her own way, her mum would give in just to shut her up. She met her match with me on day when she didn't want to walk home I couldn't drive at that time so there wasn't any other way and it wasn't far. She laid on the pavement kicking her feet and screaming, I took her sister's hand and walked away ( not too far and I was watching her) she suddenly realised that no-one was trying to calm her down and she stood up, shut up and took my other hand and walked home.

Two year olds can be forgiven for the odd tantrum it usually means they are over tired or frustrated they can't do something they are trying to do, however the sooner you get her to realise that screaming does not equal you giving in the better because older children being brats is very annoying.

meritaten

notanewuser wrote: »

Didn't that teach him that it was worth making a fuss? Boys/men (generally) hate shopping and you played right into his hands.

It's for this reason that DD's room doesn't have toys in it.

No, he usually Kicked off because when shopping he wanted EVERYTHING! being told NO would cause a huge temper tantrum. he loved shopping so he WAS deprived of an activity he normally enjoyed.
my OH is another who quite likes shopping (for food anyway).

Bangton

bossymoo wrote: »

Definitely ignore! Actually turn away from them (as long as they are safe). When there is a gap in screeching say "I can only answer proper words" in a calm low voice. But be consistent.

Mine are now 3 and 4 and we use "yes and no days" where if they are being unhelpful, mean to each other or just plain annoying, I ask if we are having a "no day". DD went through a phase of saying no everytime I asked her something, so I said "ok if we're having a no day, I'm saying no to everything too" and for the next hour I really did. No snacks, no stories, no playing out - everything they asked! After that hour they were both begging me to stop lol, and now just the mere mention of a "no day" can bring them round to more reasonable behaviour :rotfl:

There are bound to be times when you flip out, but if you can keep calm 90% of the time, they soon learn the lay of the land.

x

Genius! I love this and will adopt that if and probably when my baby becomes a little terror! :T

bigmomma051204

Hiya - Just wanted to say that I work in a Children's Centre and we are trained to deliver Triple P parenting programmes - these are a brilliant way of gaining insight into your child's behaviour and you will go away with loads of ideas and a whole new approach to parenting.

This is not a hard sell by the way In my area, this is something which is offered to all parents FREE of charge. Its worth calling your local council or children's centre to see whether they offer the courses.... its an evidence based programme that is proven to work and was developed by clinical psychologists in Australia - now its used globally! :j

AlexLK

Ignore! And, do not raise your own voice when talking to (telling off) your child. It is far more effective when not screaming / shouting / generally losing it.

Counting_Pennies_2

I have not had a chance to look at the other replies, but I wonder if you have tried giving her nutritional snacks more often.

Toddlers don't tend to eat very much, and they run around and tend to be very active.

Often on top of the usual discipline/finding their way with the world, tantrums can also be a result of low blood sugar.

If you run a 3 meal a day diet, you could try a 6 mini meal a day. So eating the three meals with you, and having two smaller snacks, such as bananas, bread sticks, raisins etc to keep up the blood sugar levels.

Also being firm and keeping consistent with the boundaries. Following through on what you say.

Good luck

notanewuser

Counting_Pennies wrote: »

I have not had a chance to look at the other replies, but I wonder if you have tried giving her nutritional snacks more often.

Toddlers don't tend to eat very much, and they run around and tend to be very active.

Often on top of the usual discipline/finding their way with the world, tantrums can also be a result of low blood sugar.

If you run a 3 meal a day diet, you could try a 6 mini meal a day. So eating the three meals with you, and having two smaller snacks, such as bananas, bread sticks, raisins etc to keep up the blood sugar levels.

Also being firm and keeping consistent with the boundaries. Following through on what you say.

Good luck

I agree about the impact of blood sugar drops. I'm not sure whether it's different for small children, but I personally attempt to keep blood sugar level rather than consistently high. Frequent blood sugar spikes contribute heavily to obesity and type 2 diabetes, and should therefore be avoided if possible.

So snacks would be ham and cheese with a couple of small crackers, I generally avoid giving DD dried fruit (it's almost pure sugar), nuts and seeds, a milky drink, veg sticks with hummus etc.

Focussing on protein and iron may be nutritionally better for little ones..........??