how would you cope (financially) alone?

Person_one

Kayalana99 wrote: »

Ok - but not just doing this to get last word in but you made a mistake, which she has actally said she doesn't pay rent but would cope if she had to go back to living by herself and had to pay rent again.

You were harsh on her with your posts as you didn't read the post correctly - so we were bound to jump the gun and point out you was in the wrong.

If everything's in his name though, he could decide to change the locks one day and there'd be nothing she could do, and as in the above post if he died she'd be in trouble.

I apologise to Harry's Nan for my harsh phrasing, and for assuming you were paying rent, but if I were your friend in real life I'd still be worried about you, sorry.

harrys_nan

Person_one wrote: »

I genuinely hope you're happy, I do, but if I were you I'd be worried about where I stood if he changed his mind one day. I think even a lodger would have more legal standing/protection, wouldn't they?

(I'm a mature student by the way. )

I really am getting fed up now.
I have my own bank account, my own money, I buy things for the house and garden, I dont expect a free ride at all. I buy him things, he buys me things, we are happy. If it all falls apart tomorrow I would do what I done when I split up with 2 unfaithful ex husbands and sort my self out.
I have more out of this relationship than I had with both marriages.1st husband was a serial cheat and a wife beater, 2nd husband decided that the grass was greener else where, after about 18 years, he was work shy but a smashing man, just didn't like work too much,my kids grew up thinking that mums was the wage earners not the dads.

I had nothing from either marriages regards money, but i worked 7 days a week doing as much overtime I could get all through 2nd marriage, to keep a roof over my kids heads.
You dont know me or my life and if you had been through half as much as me through out my life, you would understand why not much fazes me at all.
now will you get off my back?

MrsE_2

PasturesNew wrote: »

I'm female - I've always been alone.

It's not easy affording anything, so I mostly do nothing except sit home alone. I can go weeks/months without speaking to anybody... but it costs money to leave the house.

I guess you don't work? I would go mad if I didn't work.
It's a reason to get up In the morning, get dressed & do hair & makeup.
It keeps my mind busy & gives me purpose.

My boyfriend moved out fairly recently, I manage financially ok.

SailorSam

I am here on my own and manage Ok but like Pastures said earlier a day out is to Tesco.

Dunroamin

lostinrates wrote: »

Yes, I have not made (voluntarily) state pension contributions that they write and suggest making.


My life expectancy is not terribly long, :)and i do not receive an income, it is not prudent for me financially to make cvoluntarily contributions to top up state pension for something I am unlikely to receive. When I do receive an income (I sometimes do) I pay what I need to and do not seek to evade, that is not my nature nor goal.

Sorry, I misunderstood what you were saying.

lostinrates

Dunroamin wrote: »

Sorry, I misunderstood what you were saying.

That's ok.

My guess is though that there are a few women, fewer than in previous generations certainly, but we are not extinct..for whatever reasons we have to be in this position!, who don't have their own ( reliable) income nor are parents and whose top up pension contributions are voluntary and who choose for what ever reason not to make them.

For most it might well be really bad planning or head in the sand behaviour, for others it might be a considered risk.

Dunroamin

lostinrates wrote: »

That's ok.

My guess is though that there are a few women, fewer than in previous generations certainly, but we are not extinct..for whatever reasons we have to be in this position!, who don't have their own ( reliable) income nor are parents and whose top up pension contributions are voluntary and who choose for what ever reason not to make them.

For most it might well be really bad planning or head in the sand behaviour, for others it might be a considered risk.

Surely a man could be in the same situation that you are?

CRANKY40

It did happen to me and I'm fine. Insurance paid the mortgage and my husbands death in service benefit gave me a backup amount in the bank. I get a widows pension from his employer, my son also has a payment every month until he is 18 and I get widowed parents allowance. I do have a job, but I have taken a career break. I obviously don't receive a salary while I'm not working but we manage alright with the pension and WPA (which is based on national insurance contributions made by my husband and paid until my son is 18 whether I work or not). I pay full council tax and all my bills.

There was an element of planning in this though. Although we didn't expect my husband to die, my best friend died at the age of 29 which is when her OH discovered she hadn't paid the insurance and most of the essential services had been cut off for non payment in his name and reconnected in hers. I was determined I would never be in that situation and made plans accordingly.

pollypenny

I think I'd be better off financially than OH would.

I'll get half of his occupational pension. However, he will get just 2% of my earned pension up to 1987' then half of the rest.

There'll be no meat to buy! And I'll probably survive on toast and a pan of ratatouille you last all week.

I don't know what I'd do without the old beggar, though.

lostinrates

Dunroamin wrote: »

Surely a man could be in the same situation that you are?

Yes they could, certainly. Personally though I only know of one man who might be ( I don't know if he has a private income or receives benefit or anything, nor do I feel need to know) but I know quite a few women who 'might' be, though, most are older than I am that I can think of.