This Time I'm Really Going To Do It

Karmacat

Wonderful.  Just wonderful!  🌈  Rest and recovery for sure.  And, just to follow up on daisy's point, if you're asked to agree to anything on the spur of the moment, get a phrase ready to delay it, something like "I'll have a think about that, and let you know in 12/24/36 hours".

And there's sunshine today, round here, anyway.  Hope you manage to get some sleep, and stroke some equine noses 🐎 that's a horse, by the way.

Chrystal

I'm so so happy for you.  I won't add to the wonderful advice you've been given, so I'll send gentle (((hugs))) ihstead and wish you the happiest of futures.  XXX

Ramouth

Wonderful news watty!  

And thank you for sharing your journey.  I am in a similar situation to that that you were in before Ex went evil - unmarried but with many shared finances.  Your story has really made me think and I am now building up my savings rather than just focussing on paying off the joint mortgage.  You made me realise that no one knows the future and that I need to have enough of my own money squirrelled away for solo retirement rather than relying on everything being shared.

I sincerely wish you a peaceful future in your home with lots of lovely horse adventures.

x Ramouth

Watty1

@Ramouth  Reading your post made me happy that someone got to think about their position.     We were once a really  happy couple. Sometimes I wish we were back there, before the breakdown.   No one knows the future and shared assets are just that, shared.  If you cannot or will not get married or a civil partnership then yes, use your money to protect yourself in the event.    If you remain happy forever than you can share as you go along if you choose.

I have plans to put myself back on my feet, emotionally, psychologically and financially.   When I filed for the occupation order on the grounds of abuse I was in tears wondering how it had ever come to this.  But it did.  

For me, soon, another journey will begin.

This weekend I've focused on catching up at work (another day in the office today) so the new week begins without chaos.  I'm eating well and trying to sleep.  The ex is away and so I have the house to myself.   The VNM is helping me with the horses and yesterday we went to church for tea and cakes in the morning, the library to pick up books and the village bingo last night with a couple of friends.  It is going to take me a while to recover from the emotional turmoil but clearly I am stronger than I thought I was and more capable than the ex ever thought I could be.

Alchemilla

Well done, Watty🙂sending love. 

Watty1

After a weekend of work I crashed and was so tired.  Have been struggling to work.  Wrote to the council re the council tax again and am in the process of drafting a letter to the ex solicitor re the final details.  An email came in today to say that the ex will be removing his stuff on the 8th or 9th of this month so just one week to go.  No idea what will happen with WattyDog but I'm going to  just wait that out and see what happens.

earthgirl2

Wonderful news and you are bound to have good energy days, and not so good. I also agree it's a great story for others to read and think about. Thanks for sharing and making me think! Take care of yourself.

Karmacat

Do you know what *you* want to happen with Watty Dog?  You sound exhausted, though, Watty, taking care of yourself, including time in the fresh air, is the absolute priority.

SusieT

It is no real surprise that the tiredness has hit you hard, as others have said its the mental stress you have been living with suddenly clearing in several ways at the same time. Try to rest, and next week you really will see a difference when he collects his stuff. Considering he was looking at taking a lot longer and wanting 6 weeks, it seems that it was probably a last attempt at control over you which has clearly failed and he is getting out for a finish to it. It can take a long time to get rid of the tiredness so take it easy an look after yourself

Humdinger1

Yep, it will take time to sunk in @Watty1; you have triumphed magnificently but it takes its toll.  When his stuff has gone, you will see the difference.   Can't agree more re fresh air and self care.  Love Humdinger xx