Help !!!

kelloggs36

laurz wrote: »

I'm having an awful time with the CSA. I just want to let off steam. My ex walked out when my boy was six weeks old and has had no contact with him since. I contacted the CSA then and have had not a penny. I phone them constantly!!!!! My ex IS willing to pay but because he has 2 other kids they can't work out how much he should pay. my son is now 17 mnths. Is this not what they are paid to work out?
howcome it's taking over a year to type in a few numbers into their calculator. Ofcourse the arrears will be paid back at 50p a month or something ridiculous like that.

I don't understand why they can't calculate his liability either - it is quite simple really. His net income - 20% for the children living in his house means you get 15% of what is left. So, if he takes home 250 per week, you get 30 quid per week. The only difficulty they may have is that they don't know where he works because he hasn't told them? They would have to trace his employer through the inland revenue which can take time. The other alternative is that it may be stuck on the system and may need to go clerical which takes months.

Can you check where the CSA are exactly with the case and update us? We can advise more specifically if we know what they have said is the reason for not doing a calculation - the fact that he has children is not a reason for not being able to do this.

kelloggs36

TheWaltons wrote: »

I think you're on the wrong board if you understanding on this one, it seems to me like most women/men want blood and couldn't care less.


I see exactly where you're coming from here, I personally wouldn't want to see someone so screwed over financially, however, I would expect a meeting in between.Is there any way you can contact him and come to some sort of civilised agreement?

To be honest though, it looks like things have gone too far, especially with the CSA now referring it to a debt collection agency.

If it is a private case (which it is) then there is nothing stopping the OP from trying to come to a private agreement. She may have already done this but he may not have wanted to make such an agreement - like my ex. In that case the choice is simple - CSA or nothing. If he was unwilling to come to an agreement privately then it is not surprising that he hasn't complied with the CSA - he has made it clear that he doesn't want to pay. Quite frankly this is outrageous - he could avoid CSA if he wants to if he is willing to negotiate with the OP. He knows where she is. If he wants the CSA off his back all he has to do is pick up the phone (he knows where she is by the sounds of things) and talk to her to try and reach an agreement. If he won't do that then I do not believe that the OP should have any guilty feelings about getting what her CHILD is entitled to and could benefit from. By not getting the arrears due, she is denying the child the chance of using the money for their benefit - up to her of course, but I shouldn't feel at all guilty if my ex has blatantly refused to comply - it's not as though she has claimed out of revenge and wants more money, just the duty that he has to maintain his child. If he finds it stressful then the only person that he can look to to blame is himself. It is clear that the OP wants to be reasonable, but he won't so if he won't then he can only expect things to be stressful and difficult with the CSA and it isn't her fault at all -only his own.

laurz

my case has been in the CSAs hands since he left(he became an alcoholic and abusive) last month (after over a year of no progress since they recieved my claim) they passed it to cerical in Bolton. They also said he's being cooperative they have all his details. i think the problem may lie with his ex wife.

I feel like i'm banging my head against a brick wall. i phone every week. Ireally need the money.

to make matters worse He dotes on his other two kids by his ex wife and has no contact wi my charming little boy and doesn't want any. I always knew when i was expecting that our child would never compare.

missylou_2

Laurz sorry to hear you are having such a rough deal with your case.

I have an update on mine that is so ridiculous it seems almost farcical. Well it made me laugh anyway but that may be more to do with the fact that I don't get out much!

After all the stress and worry of our case being referred to a debt collection agency it would seem that this is no longer the case. Our case is now back in the hands of the Plymouth team.

The reason for this?

He apparently contacted them and of his own choice volunteered a payment for the princely sum of £35.00, (not too sure how this occured as there has been DEO in place with this employer since March, although as yet no amount has successfully been deducted!) along with assurances that he will pay what he can whenever he can.

TheWaltons_3

kelloggs36 wrote: »

If it is a private case (which it is) then there is nothing stopping the OP from trying to come to a private agreement. She may have already done this but he may not have wanted to make such an agreement - like my ex. In that case the choice is simple - CSA or nothing. If he was unwilling to come to an agreement privately then it is not surprising that he hasn't complied with the CSA - he has made it clear that he doesn't want to pay. Quite frankly this is outrageous - he could avoid CSA if he wants to if he is willing to negotiate with the OP. He knows where she is. If he wants the CSA off his back all he has to do is pick up the phone (he knows where she is by the sounds of things) and talk to her to try and reach an agreement. If he won't do that then I do not believe that the OP should have any guilty feelings about getting what her CHILD is entitled to and could benefit from. By not getting the arrears due, she is denying the child the chance of using the money for their benefit - up to her of course, but I shouldn't feel at all guilty if my ex has blatantly refused to comply - it's not as though she has claimed out of revenge and wants more money, just the duty that he has to maintain his child. If he finds it stressful then the only person that he can look to to blame is himself. It is clear that the OP wants to be reasonable, but he won't so if he won't then he can only expect things to be stressful and difficult with the CSA and it isn't her fault at all -only his own.

Men have to pay for their kids. It is their duty. I am all for absent parents paying for their child and there should be no excuse in the World... however, as a human being, I would not want to see someone on the bones of their backside or destroyed completely over money.

I think it is reasonable for the OP to want to be amicable - why should she want blood? This only serves to alienate the absent parent even more and cause resentment towards the child - who is innocent, and in most cases with young children, do not understand the importance of money anyway.

If she has no choice but to continue with CSA, then if I were MissyLou I would continue and do my best to try and regain contact with the absent parent and be reasonable. Surely it should be MissyLou's choice whether they go to a debt collection agency or not?

By the sounds of it, MissyLou would just like something towards the upkeep of her child. If he is unwillingly to be mature and responsible, then she has done her best and can rest assured that SHE has been the reasonable one. If, after compromise, he can't be decent - then go for blood :rotfl:

I would.

Mr_Green_Genes

missylou wrote: »

After all the stress and worry of our case being referred to a debt collection agency it would seem that this is no longer the case. Our case is now back in the hands of the Plymouth team.

Now that's what I call a result!! You might not think much of Plymouth (why should you, they're pretty useless) but compared to Bolton, they're fantastic. Bolton is the single most useless office in the entire CSA. From my dealings with them, it seems that the collective IQ of the whole place may just about reach that of my cat.

kelloggs36

I agree, but he cannot expect to not pay anything at all and by the sounds of things he has failed to do so thusfar. Wiping out the arrears won't change his attitude. Yes, it is up to the OP whether the CSA collect the arrears, as I said in my original post. I don't agree that anyone should be screwed over for money, but he legally owes it to the child and if he won't make an agreement to pay, then he can't be surprised to find they get heavy handed with him. It is purely his choice whether he buries his head in the sand and tries to pretend that the liability doesn't exist - he can't blame anybody else but himself, and not the PWC if she insists on collection. She should not feel responsible for whatever happens in the future. She is being too nice in my opnion towards the NRP, but the money is owed to her for the upkeep of her child and if she doesn't want it, then why deny her child what is rightfully theris?

kelloggs36

Mr_Green_Genes wrote: »

Now that's what I call a result!! You might not think much of Plymouth (why should you, they're pretty useless) but compared to Bolton, they're fantastic. Bolton is the single most useless office in the entire CSA. From my dealings with them, it seems that the collective IQ of the whole place may just about reach that of my cat.

Come on Mr GG, don't insult your cat!

Mr_Green_Genes

kelloggs36 wrote: »

Come on Mr GG, don't insult your cat!

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

laurz

thanx a lot for your reasurance mr green genes. incase you didn't read my post i've waited more than a year, only last month it was refered to Bolton.

I phoned today : they have no record of me or my case.

i so wanna swear