Was I over reacting ?

Ellie2758

No, you didnt overreact and I agree with others who've said she isnt a true friend at all.

needmoney

Dump the fool and save your sanity who needs that kind of thing from a 'friend'.

alwaysskint96

snowmaid wrote: »

I would seriously question the frienship. One does not chuck in a 4 year old, or any child so young!

The fact that your friend was putting you down afterwards sounds as if she felt guilty at what was supposedly a fun action!

I wouldn't leave your child with her.

It totally depends on the child!! My youngest is 3.5 and one of his fave games last summer was being thrown into the pool- he thinks its hilarious

taxi97w

Your 'friend' is getting all the flack here. What have you said to your DS about holding your DD under the water. This is scarier than being thrown into the water IMO.

misswig

You are completely right to be so upset and IMO you did not overreact at all. You are also doing the right thing by taking her swimming SAFELY to the local swimming pool to combat any fear of water which may come of this.

My DS(3) is terrified of the water-loves the thought, but not the water. I took him swimming to baby classes from the age of 4 months and he loved it. By the age of 13 months he was swimming without the aid of arm bands and would happily 'plop' in. His father never came swimming with us (always too busy) and was of the opinion that you need to 'chuck 'em in, they'll soon learn!!) which is what he did on holiday when i had back turned- he's been terrified ever since!!

I try to take him as often as i can and we are slowly making progress

rchddap1

I'd be more concerned about your son holding her head under the water. It may not have been intentional, but still he needs to understand that this is not acceptable in any way shape or form.

I like swimming....but I have a fear of getting water in my eyes. So I never put my head under the water. Don't know where this fear has come from. Possibly from dunking when I was very little.

Oh...and no you weren't overreacting.

bestpud

taxi97w wrote: »

Your 'friend' is getting all the flack here. What have you said to your DS about holding your DD under the water. This is scarier than being thrown into the water IMO.

Is that meant to be funny? He was trying to help but is only 6 and was hindering instead. Even more reason why children and pools should not be taken lightly!

There's three reasons why I think your friend is not someone I'd want to be friends with:

I don't think it's aceptable to throw someone else's child in a pool - unless already done frequently by the actual parent and it is very obvious they enjoy it and can swim sufficiently.

Friends do not criticise each other - good friends like you for who you are, warts and all.

I don't think it is a good thing for anyone to critcise parenting decisions in front of the children concerned, not even the childs parents! It's not her business how you bring your child up anyway but she certainly should not be 'telling' your children that you aren't doing it 'properly'.

You've been rather restrained so far I think! It was good that you stayed and let your daughter back in the water though - I think it would have been worse for her (where fear is concerned) if you'd have had a big row and stomped off straight after the incident!

taxi97w

bestpud wrote: »

Is that meant to be funny?

No, it wasn't meant to be funny (I would have used a smilie if so:D ). I think the actions of the son , as well as the friend have contributed to the daughter's fear. I don't believe the son should be chastised but I don't think the friend should get all the backlash either.

ooobedoo

I haven't read all the posts, but I think it would well be that she feel very guilty and is trying to shift blame, I don't really think anybody needs a friend who puts them down....

Maybe give her a really wide berth till she clicks that she has upset you, then she can grovel or you lose a person who wasn't actually a friend at all.

Good luck

MRSMCAWBER

Hi Savvy_sue....
if that had been my hubby, he would have come home from work the following day to find his beloved fish pond filled in, and would have been lucky he wasnt in it at the time!!