My Wife is a Snob

[Deleted User]

poet123 wrote: »

Strange, I always thought marriage was about joint income not "yours" and "mine".

Me too.. with my wife and I, it has always been a 'household income' - the fact that I earn twice as much is irrelevant as it is 'family' money, not 'mine'. Anyway, that subject has been done to death on other threads!

poet123

heartbreak_star wrote: »

I can't ever imagine pooling finances with my OH. It wouldn't be fair - he earns more than me. Once the bills are paid, my money is my own and same for him. It would remain the same if we married, I would see no reason for it to change.

Different situations for different people though

HBS x

Fair?

Each to their own, but for us marriage has always been a partnership and all our resources have been pooled. I was a SAHM for years but neither I or my husband ever felt that the monies were not "mine" because I didn't have a paid job.

I earn a good salary now, but my DH earns five times as much and it is all still ours not mine or his.

aileth

We have separate bank accounts, but the bills/outgoings are split, so is everything else. I earn more but I don't consider the extra 'mine', I use it for us as a couple, say for car services, flea treatments, vets, dinner parties, going out etc. If one of us has a bit of a rubbish bonus one month, the other will step in and pay for extra bits.

heartbreak_star

ringo_24601 wrote: »

Anyway, that subject has been done to death on other threads!

Yes it has.

I just feel that if she's not willing to contribute, she has no right to require an "upscale".

HBS x

Cherryscone

I doubt she's a snob but she may well be dissatisfied with her house but then a good few of us are ...my advice sit her down ask how she feels and sort it out.

poet123

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Yes it has.

I just feel that if she's not willing to contribute, she has no right to require an "upscale".

HBS x

You can't really judge if you don't know their dynamic. Not all couples have the mindset that they have to contribute equally in the monetary stakes. Contributions can be in other forms.

pops5588

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Yes it has.

I just feel that if she's not willing to contribute, she has no right to require an "upscale".

HBS x

Although OP has not yet confirmed whether she did or didn't contribute towards the deposit. We are all working on assumptions thus far.

heartbreak_star

pops5588 wrote: »

Although OP has not yet confirmed whether she did or didn't contribute towards the deposit. We are all working on assumptions thus far.

Very true.

I suppose, as we have no children, we are very much of the mindset that everything is equal - finance, housework, etc.

I probably spend more on petrol than he does, but he lunches out at work every day. That's our money to spend how we want.

OP - can you confirm your wife's input into house funding/purchase?

HBS x

arbroath_lass

Could it be because of the things that go bump in the night rather than the area?

Sorry, just teasing a little :rotfl:

InsideInsurance

1886 wrote: »

Two years ago me and my wife bought our first house together, we had previously been renting a small apartment

If one incident of eye rolling is the best/worst example you can bring up after two years of living there then I would argue that you really dont have an issue of her being a snob.

The fact you feel it necessary to post a very minor thing on a public forum and complain about your wife does however suggest that there are other more significant issues that need dealing with.