Advice leave or stay?

Bazey

I'd leave him, you need some space in your first post.

nicmccor

If I do not speak to him like now I do not have his number he always contacts me he does come up but not always when planned and lately not giving me much notice to make plans instead of sitting home. I make alot of time for friends and family so I am not just waiting around for him.

paulineb_2

nicmccor wrote: »

If I do not speak to him like now I do not have his number he always contacts me he does come up but not always when planned and lately not giving me much notice to make plans instead of sitting home. I make alot of time for friends and family so I am not just waiting around for him.

You dont have his number??????

And alarm bells arent ringing, for goodness sake, hes either married, got a fiance or he has a live in gf.

Youve been seeing someone for a year and you dont have their phone number.

nicmccor

I have deleted his number to leave that he contacts me just to see how he responds we have weekends away and that its just lately he has gone distant alot of the time he has been in ireland with his dad ill.

paulineb_2

nicmccor wrote: »

I have deleted his number to leave that he contacts me just to see how he responds we have weekends away and that its just lately he has gone distant alot of the time he has been in ireland with his dad ill.

Ok, you had his number but youve deleted it because you wanted to see if you did would he contact you. And he rarely does

What exactly are you getting from this relationship thats positive in any way?

You are putting your life on hold for this man whether you believe that or not

tattycath

paulineb wrote: »

You dont have his number??????

And alarm bells arent ringing, for goodness sake, hes either married, got a fiance or he has a live in gf.

Youve been seeing someone for a year and you dont have their phone number.

Totally agree with Pauline on this.
From what I have read, he always contacts you and you can't ring him? Because he either has a wife or a girlfriend. You appear to be a convenient distraction for him 'when he feels like it' or 'has nothing better to do'.
Move on, you deserve a proper relationship with someone who is available and wants to be with you.

[Deleted User]

Ask yourself Do You Really Want All This?
Is this the sort of life a year down the line that's not gone anywhere?
This isn't a normal loving relationship is it?
Ide have run a mile, best to be on your own knowing what you will and wont put up with rather than this..
No1 Rule, if your sleeping with a guy, they show you respect. They want you to meet his friends, family, workmates, children. They don't just call you last minute, they make firm plans with you.
Actions speak louder than words. His actions are saying a lot....

19lottie82

Have you met his Dad? Or any other family members?

I'm sorry OP, but I have to think it looks like he is in a relationship with his "ex" and you're his bit on the side.

Does he have a facebook? Any clues on that? Or try googling him and see what you can find.

Of course we could be wrong, but it does sound like that is what is going on.

nicmccor

yes I get what you are saying and agree to a point I have only this week deleted his number I do normally call him and he calls me still find hard to believe that he is doing anything but being lazy rather than hiding something as I could tell when we was moving he was into it where now no matter what he says I no longer feel his heart is in it no matter what the reason that is why I am now having more doubts that this will go any further and can see us splitting up when before I could not.

cod3

OP - dump him and find someone who really does share your dreams and goals. This guy says he wants this, but talk is cheap. If you keep waiting for this chancer, you may leave it too late for your dreams of marriage and children. You have dodged a bullet here. Move on x