Son Going To Nursery School

Janepig

My cousin's DS is starting full time in the nursery class at DD/DS's school in September - he turns 3 at the end of August. I know my cousin is worried about him being ready, of course she is, but there's no question of him not going. My best friend's DS is going to be in the same class and he turned 3 in March. She's not quite so worried, other than about the mayhem she thinks he'll cause!! The two classes are separated by age so there's no more than roughly six months between the eldest and the youngest in each class. That's how it stays then right until year 6.

I found it alot easier when DS started because I'd been through it already with DD. He was 3 and 9 months when he went full time and because they stagger the starting days he started afew days after DD went back, so I had to leave him with my dad while I dropped her off and picked her up because there'd have been ructions if I'd taken him to school but he couldn't go into his class!! He was very used to the school having been back and forth on the school run and had also been with me on a six week language and play course on Friday afternoons and even afew school discos before he started.

Jx

FBaby

Is it him who isn't ready or you? Don't hold him back if it is you who is struggling to let him go. If it is him you think isn't ready, why not try some sessions and see how it goes. It is amazing how quickly children can adapt with caring and dedicated staff. You might find that he goes from not ready to ready in only a few sessions.

StressedOutMummy

Thank you for all your replies. Whilst I think it a good idea for him to go to nursery I am worried about him. I am an older first time mum which may have a lot to do with it and he was very premature so is smaller than some.He is a lovely sociable little boy who is extremely happy and I want him to stay that way. By the way, I work and my user name "stressed" has nothing to do with my son! Another factor is (and this sounds awful) is that everyone says your child will pick up habits that you don't necessarily find acceptable.

pigpen

StressedOutMummy wrote: »

Thank you for all your replies. Whilst I think it a good idea for him to go to nursery I am worried about him. I am an older first time mum which may have a lot to do with it and he was very premature so is smaller than some.He is a lovely sociable little boy who is extremely happy and I want him to stay that way. By the way, I work and my user name "stressed" has nothing to do with my son! Another factor is (and this sounds awful) is that everyone says your child will pick up habits that you don't necessarily find acceptable.

And they can pick these up from children in the park or at toddler group etc. or relatives. They pick up 'bad habits' everywhere.. even from you.. I bet you aren't perfect .. it is how you deal with these that is important.

a few of mine have been prem too.. it really doesn't make much difference once they get to this age! I also have 2 with a growth hormone deficiency.. DD4 was wearing age 18-24 month clothes when she starts nursery at 3 and 3 months!

Tigsteroonie

StressedOutMummy wrote: »

Thank you for all your replies. Whilst I think it a good idea for him to go to nursery I am worried about him. I am an older first time mum which may have a lot to do with it and he was very premature so is smaller than some.He is a lovely sociable little boy who is extremely happy and I want him to stay that way. By the way, I work and my user name "stressed" has nothing to do with my son! Another factor is (and this sounds awful) is that everyone says your child will pick up habits that you don't necessarily find acceptable.

I'm definitely an 'older first time mum' and Andrew was very premature & tiny as regular posters will remember! I had to fight to get him into an SEN nursery last January when he was 3.5 and I had no worries about him going, his need to learn to be around others and socialise was far more important than any misgivings I might have had.

He starts SEN school full-time this September, just a fortnight after his 4th birthday. I'm going to have to hunt to find uniform to fit him as he'll need a size 2y (not even 2-3y). And he is still nowhere near being toilet trained, but the school are geared up for that.

My mother (his Nan) thinks he's too small, too young, and it's too early. We disagree, now that we've found the right place for him to attend, we are keen that he go and enjoy it as soon as possible.

Frogletina

As a child, I was at a Montessori school 5 mornings a week from the age of 3 and I know that benefitted me but I don't have any knowledge of nurseries today.

I paid for my first child to go to playgroup at 3 and she was ready for it - she ended up going for 4 mornings a week and I felt it was worth paying for. No free nursery places then.

My second child was not ready for playgroup at 3, and in any case I had moved into a different area and we were very busy taking my eldest to school and back, at lunchtimes as well. For the first time in his life, my son had my attention without having to share it with his sister.

I think mothers should trust their instincts. What is good for one child is not necessarily good for another.

notanewuser

pigpen wrote: »

They are only allowed 15 hours a week free so yes it is part time.. They go full time at school in reception from September after they are 4 so it is full time then.. but being an August baby she will only just be 4 so I'll be even less happy about that one.. I may consider keeping her at nursery an extra term or 2, it depends how she settles in and how she gets on.. each child being individual it might not be for her.. though I'm certain once she gets there it will all be a doddle.

Some local authorities here (Wales) give children the entitlement to a full time place at a school nursery from the term after they turn 3. So January in DD's case (3 in October).

But the schools are massively oversubscribed, and unless you have an older sibling at the school you can go whistle. If they can't provide a place, they get 2 terms' funding at 10 hours a week. A very unfair system, I think.

I think DD will be ready for it in January, but I'm not prepared to take her almost 8 miles each way every day (if there is any space in that school) when we have to apply again for a nursery place for next september and again for reception the following year. She could end up with 3 different schools before she's 5 with the current (stupid) system. So she'll probably stay in her meithrin setting for another year, and I'll get a small discount on her fees for 20 weeks or something.

pigpen wrote: »

DD4 was wearing age 18-24 month clothes when she starts nursery at 3 and 3 months!

DD was 2 weeks overdue, and is now almost 3. She's mainly in age 2-3 clothes now but was in a 12-18 month outfit last week. :eek:

StressedOutMummy

.Thank you Tigs and Pigpen,
I think the problem is with me - don't want to let go.But he is so little - was 11 weeks early and in hospital 3 months so very protective. Everyone who knows me say I should relax around him! I just don't want him to get hurt

barbiedoll

If you don't think that he is ready then you can always hold him back a term. I did with my DS, I was a SAHM and I had just found a part-time job, along with a childminder at the same time as he was due to start nursery. He was quite clingy at that age and I felt that having to cope with a childminder and nursery at the same time would have been a little too much for him, so I spoke to the school who were very supportive and agreed to defer his place.

He started a term later and he never looked back. He had spent time with someone other than me and he was far more ready to cope with nursery by then. I never had any tears at the school gates, he was much better at socialising and playing with other children and he has never given us any problems at school, he's now 15!

I do think that some children start nursery too early but you should be careful that it's not just your insecurities that are holding him back. If he is very sociable now, there's no reason why he wouldn't enjoy a few hours at nursery each week. As for picking up "undesirable habits", you're never going to be able to prevent that, sadly. But I promise, he won't turn into a swearing, thieving, monster overnight......most kids at nursery are lovely!

(Shame the same can't be said of some of the parents!:eek:)

Frogletina

What time of year was he born? I find that makes a lot of difference and especially as he was premature. Had my son been born a few weeks later he would have started school a year later than he did.