The Secret Dreamworld of a (Scottish) Shopaholic

marmiterulesok

Good luck with your new job.

Things seem to be going well.Keep up the good work!

Eating out when you don't have the funds is tricky.I suppose that one way is to be brutally honest.I have said no;it was a day-out involving a boat trip and a visiting an Art Gallery with a meal in a restaurant tagged on at the last minute.I said that my budget didn't stretch to a meal in a restaurant and didn't go.

It sounds like it was a 'leaving-do' meal,so,yes,refusing would be tricky.I hope you enjoy the meal!

missty25

Hi,

I've been having a wee read through your diary and wanted to just wish you well on your journey.

I've recently had the light bulb moment and feel better for actually adding up all the debts and starting to deal with them.

Hope you don't mind me asking but what other forum do you sell clothes on? I have loads of baby and girls clothes to get rid of. Tia x

OrangeFairy

Hi SS

Hubby is away until Sunday so I filled my lonely night reading your diary after you posted on mine.

I really feel for you and the situation you are in. You are doing really well though and seem to have a really good account of what you have coming in etc.

The hen night thing is really annoying. My hubby had to go to a stag do to Benidorm for one of his mates which put us back about £500! I was mortified! For my hen night 10 of us went for a meal and drinks in our local town. I even changed up Mr T vouchers for that restaurant and I paid for everyone's meal!

One of my issues was always wanting the best clothes and presents etc for the kids. My hubby has a son with an ex and when we had DD1 our CSA payments were huge. This angered me a lot that due to this situation my little lady was going without nice things so I ended up spending a lot on next and other places. Hubby had a huge amount of debt when we met which didn't help.

Next is a pain in the read end for me as I order stuff feeling like I'm not spending money and then I keep more than I would if I was buying it in a shop. My September overpayments will be clearing my remaining next balance and closing the account. I can order things to arrive in store or I can wait until we go to Exeter (our nearest city) and see a large selection in a big store.

I will be following you on your journey.

Huge hugs as I think you need them. You WILL get this sorted xx

OF xx

MrsSmith2013

Good news on the money making, you're doing great!!

Keep up the good work on the declutering as well, thats brilliant. I always feel good after I have done a big tidy out.

Mrs S x

daisy_1571

Hi SS, have read your diary and am sending you very best wishes for your journey. I suppose the only other thing I have to add is that the time will pass and you could be looking at arriving in June 2015 still in this same situation, panicking over bills and hiding things around the house. I know you won't be like that since you have started this brave new life. I know it seems like a long time away when you keep going over and over the figures looking for some way to get an extra £10 here or there but someday you will be in June 2015 and looking back at this - by then you will be able to see just how far you have come but each day only went by one at a time iyswim. You also never know how your life may change between now and then, you may get a better paying job, or a second unexpected job opportunity may appear for a short time or you may find a more local job that means you dont have so much petrol to pay for etc etc. I also cant comment fully as I only have furry kids but I am sure your happier presence, when this weight is lifted, is going to mean more to them than whatever you think they "need". We were just talking yesterday at work about how our mothers used to buy cheap biscuits or stuff the family didnt like so much (eg Penguins in our house) but looking at it as an adult you know it was because they were feeding 5 people on 1 wage and money must have been tight so they either bought cheap or bought things that would get eaten more slowly. None of us assumed for a minute our parents didnt love us - so dont project your values onto your children and assume they "need" things. One of the biggest LBM for me was separating real actual "need" from "want" and "want really badly". At the end of the day, if your house went on fire could you or your hubby or your children list every single thing in there ? I know i couldn't in my house - what a lot of money i have wasted over the years on things i could not even tell you i own now. I also couldn't tell you what i received in presents as a child other than one or two individual things - a bike one year, a Jacko monkey another, a dolls wardode to keep my (mostly homemade) Sindy clothes in that i later realised my mum and dad had made when i found the sticky back plastic but i still have it cos it means so much more than a plastic one ever would have. Sorry, I seem to have gone off on a tangent there - this is all meant to be praise at the way you are tackling things, support that yes it will take a while but you will get there and that so many people have been fighting their own particular battles too and we are all here for each other. Heres some big buckets of support and strength SS,

daisy xxx

scottishspendaholic

Thanks so much for your support everyone, if it wasn't for this place, I think I'd go totally do-lally. I absolutely know what you mean Daisy, my Mum and Dad used to save up 20ps (still do!) and buy broken biscuits, and I am really aware that on one average wage, they did struggle, until we were teenagers & Mum went back to work.

I've had some real highs & lows over the last 24 hours. On the positive side, I got given a card with a £90 cash collection in it when I had my last day at work yesterday - I'm going to use £80 of this towards my making money challenge. I also have sold £33 worth of children's clothes, things are looking good for eBay sales & I have a free evening tonight to do some more listing and sorting.

On the downside, I've been really stupid. I logged onto an old bingo account to see that I had £10 cash there. I tried to withdraw it, however minimum withdrawal was £30. It's been ages since I've done any online gambling, so I forgot all about the play through rules & deposited £20, then tried to withdraw the £30, which all looked good until this morning, when I received the "sorry we cant process your transaction" email as I've only played through 3% of what I'd need to to withdraw anything :eek:, what an idiot! That's £20 down the drain. If that wasn't bad enough, I created a new account with Mecca last night and deposited £10 (this is before I knew about the above problem) and then promptly lost it. So total loss = £30. I would like to point out that I do not have a gambling problem, but bingo sites have got me the odd £10-£20 (and a while back - £393!) profit when I've played before. I'm so mad with myself. I'm scrabbling round for loose change & rejoicing when I find 2p, then lose £30 completely avoidably in one evening!?!? However, I cant get it back, so I have to learn & move on. On the upside, the Mecca sign up was via TCB, so hopefully I'll get £30.30 cashback at some point.

With 28 days to go until 31/8, I have an achievable £183 left to make this month (which includes £75 overpayment to debts as per snowball & the extra £100 Visa payment). This is £41 per week or just over £5 per day. I can do this.

scottishspendaholic

Money making done for today:-

£2.34 - I've written a letter (! what a palaver !) to close an old savings account
£6 approx. after fees eBay - BN boxed jewellery up for sale

scottishspendaholic

For reference:-

September 2013

Income = £450 (£370 + £30 DCC + £50 exps)
-£180 petrol (estimate, won’t know exact amount until job situation settles down)
-£355 snowballing
-£100 Visa
-£40 hennie
-£40 friends & families’ birthdays
-£30 misc.
Assumed expenditure = £725
Deficit = -£275

October 2013

Income = £450 (£370 + £30 DCC + £50 exps)
-£180 petrol (estimate, won’t know exact amount until job situation settles down)
-£355 snowballing
-£100 Visa
-£30 Oct hols days out
-£20 wedding
-£10 friends & families’ birthdays
-£30 misc.
Assumed expenditure = £725
Deficit = -£275

Ways to make £550 by 30 September 2013
*Extra salary - old job - estimate £100 nett
*List on eBay – estimate £150 profit
*Mystery shop – estimate £10 profit
*Car boot 8/9/13 – estimate £50 profit
*TCB payout (have £52 pending)?
*Onepoll payout - £40?
*The rest - !?!?!

marmiterulesok

Don't let the lost £30 drag you down.How frustrating though.Like you say,you learn and move on.:)

I hope that you get the cashback.

OrangeFairy

Hi SS,

I agree with Marmite- don't let the £30 bring you down as you are doing so well. It is just one of those things so forget about it and move on.

I have complete confidence you will reach your goal by the end of August!

OF x