ex refusing to pay his half of the morgage

alleycat`

Rather than getting into the ins and outs of this I'd like to ask a question.

Is there any particular reason you need to remain in the house?

The reason i ask is because in the same position, if i was your Ex, and you offered to put it on the market I'd be more inclined to continue payments.

This is on the basis that there is a definitive end point and i won't be , potentially, trashing my credit rating on the assumption you might not be able to cope?

There is precious little equity in the house to fight over, based on what is mentioned, so it might give a clear path to a fresh start?

So, even in the short term, is renting a realistically better option for you and the kids until you get everything squared away?

I know it will be a another wrench but i just wanted to put it out there as a way to possibly progress.

Just a thought.

Edit: + what LazyD has added below.

zzzLazyDaisy

doing_it_for_my_babies wrote: »

2 bed and very little equity maybe a grand or so.

OP I think you may need to start considering the possibility of selling up and making a fresh start for you and your children. I say this because one of the avenues the law has for redressing the inequality in income between the parent who has the main responsibility for keeping a roof over the children's head and the parent who is no longer resident, is to give the PWC a larger slice of the equity in the house, which hopefully enables that person to sell up and downsize and provide a home for the children that way. Alternatively, if there it sometimes happens that the house is transferred to the PWC who then remortgages but that depends on you earning enough to do that, which doesn't sound likely. Because you work you are not entitled to mortgage interest support.

All this means that you may find that it is not a realistic proposition for you to keep and maintain the house on your sole income - and it may come to that. If you are in rented accommodation you will get LHA (housing benefit for private rentals). You need to search your local authority website for the LHA for 2 bedroom houses and then input your details into http://www.turn2us.org.uk/benefits_search.aspx

Whilst there are disadvantages to renting, one of the major advantages is that it no longer ties you to your ex with a financial millstone around your neck.

NOTE: This is not intended as legal advice, but just as a suggestion for exploration and possible consideration.

doing_it_for_my_babies

I Have Never stopped him seeing the kids appart from the 8weeks. Its not full payment of his half is it. I wondered why I left here before. Now I know.

Rottensocks

So, if you're in the middle of mediation now, but he's suddenly stopped making his payment on the mortgage.....Does that mean mediation has broken down?

Ultimately, he is probably going to want the divorce more than you, because he will have his girlfriend agitating about it in the background.
(It is also highly possible that this is why he won't have his own kids for more than one night: girlfriend wants some time on the weekend too, and also probably the real reason he won't set foot inside his old house without a chaperone - not allowed to! :rotfl:)

Anyway, if you know he's being pestered to get the divorce done, it does give you some leverage.

.

zzzLazyDaisy

doing_it_for_my_babies wrote: »

I Have Never stopped him seeing the kids appart from the 8weeks. Its not full payment of his half is it. I wondered why I left here before. Now I know.

People are trying to help you see the legal position. No it isn't 'his half'. Because there is no such thing in law as 'his half'. At the moment he is paying you more than he is legally obliged to pay - probably because he is concerned for his credit rating, but still that is the case. He is also self employed so if you were to go to the CSA it is very easy for him to manipulate the figures so he only pays a nominal amount and the CSA is just not set up to deal with this, so you could be left even more frustrated and angry and with almost no financial contribution from him at all. With no legal avenue of redress.

Throw into the mix the fact that he has another woman in his life who may well be seeking to stake her claim on his time, attention and money, and you can see where this is heading.

That is why people are telling you that you are lucky. Simply because in the world of the PWCs with self employed ex spouses, that financial abandonment is a fact of life, that the law seems to be unable or unwilling to address in a lot of cases.

doing_it_for_my_babies

Thank you. Thats a much nicer way of putting it .... And thanks everyone else. Im just scared.

Dunroamin

doing_it_for_my_babies wrote: »

I Have Never stopped him seeing the kids appart from the 8weeks. Its not full payment of his half is it. I wondered why I left here before. Now I know.

You said "he will no longer pay the full amount just the interest " which is why I suggested that you could switch to an interest only mortgage and then he would be paying half.

I hadn't realised that you were working when I suggested you claim SMI but you might find it possible to stay in the marital home of you had only half of an interest only mortgage to pay. Alternatively, as suggested above, selling up and renting might be simpler.

shoe*diva79

I really dont understand people who decide to stop paying towards a mortgage they are named on. This will cause him financial difficulties in the future if you cannot afford the full mortgage on your own.

Dunroamin

doing_it_for_my_babies wrote: »

I Have Never stopped him seeing the kids appart from the 8weeks. Its not full payment of his half is it. I wondered why I left here before. Now I know.

I thought you said you were a regular poster?

GwylimT

As a parent it is his responsibility to care for his children, not an ex partner, it is your responsibility to put a roof over your head and it is his responsibility to put a roof over his own head. If you were the one who had to move out would you be paying your own rent and half the mortgage on the house that you weren't being let into even though you are legally entitled to enter your own home.

If you cannot afford to pay the mortgage then you will have to move, I'm guessing a fall in house value has led to the £1K equity?