My ill child being ignored by her father, I am so angry.

fabforty

valk_scot wrote: »

You're still saying my kids, you know.

It's just a figure of speech.

Most people posting on here say my son, daughter, child etc. It really isn't that big a deal and far too much is being made out of it.

I don't think OP is suggesting that she made these children all by herself .

ValHaller

fabforty wrote: »

It's just a figure of speech.

Most people posting on here say my son, daughter, child etc. It really isn't that big a deal and far too much is being made out of it.

I don't think OP is suggesting that she made these children all by herself .

It may be just a figure of speech, in relation to a situation primarily involving chicken pox for example.

But in the present situation, where the relationship between father and daughter is the core subject, I would expect 'our daughter' or even 'his daughter'.

CustardAndPickles

So:
1. He's not been interested in his first child (from a different relationship)
2. He's been violent to you
3. He has slept apart from you since your first pregnancy
4. He's had continual affairs.
5. You're getting divorced

Yet your posts seem to express disappointment and surprise just as much as anger at his behaviour. You're wasting your time and energy. If he doesn't want to be around, fine. You're splitting up anyway.

The likelihood is that after the divorce, he's not going to want much to do with them, and you have the option of poisoning their thoughts further (well dad's not sent a card again cos he's horrible) or letting them work their own way through it (well, dad's not sent a card again, I don't know why, lets not worry about it and do x / y / z instead).

Personally I'd stop wasting so much energy getting angry, shrug and concentrate on the children instead. You're not likely to change the situation.

FBaby

Be prepared for a lot worse! My ex didn't even bother to come to see our daughter in hospital when she was 8 and had an operation on her eye. He didn't even come when she got home later that day, and I am not even sure he came the following day. I recall it is me who called to say she was ok. His response was that he hates hospitals....

Yet of course, when he decided that it suited him to be a devoted father, I was expected to give up all my plans because of HIS rights as a father. It's been like this ever since. He is nothing more than a babysitter when it suits him (I can only have them a total of 5 days during the school holidays, sorry) but a dad with the same rights than I as the mother when he decides (because this one particular year, he wants them for New Years Eve).

I can't make him a responsible father, I have to be grateful that he does pretend to be a good father to the children, after all, it's about them, not about me