The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

GreyQueen

Possession wrote: »

I was just reading a wedding dilemma on Mumsnet, £30K wedding, hen night and stag night each a week abroad, and wedding spanning over 3 days. Beggars belief.

Yeah, makes you wonder if they'll be rowing about lack of money in the months/ years to come. These days it's perfectly possible to be still paying for your wedding at the same time as paying for your divorce.

The columnist and author India Knight (her The Thrift Book is rather good) was scathing about the mentality which demands that the hen/ stag do be a week of revelry. She said it's rude and that you're friends are pleased for you, but not that pleased. Pointed out that if you decide your besties should have a spa weekend or run amok in Prague for a week, you should get over yourself.

Comes to something when people have to decline wedding or stag/ hen invites because they've got so overblown. I personally like to see a buncha women in pink cowgirl hats from the discount store roaring around the city getting silly-drunk and having a great laugh at the bride-to-be in her L plates.

They're having a ball, and that's what it's all about, innit?

tattycath

We had a joint stag and hen with a few close friends-few drinks and a meal.
Wedding was under 2k-including everything-not been on honeymoon yet. We'll probably have a 'special holiday' at some point.

Possession

Our wedding cost us £50. I do appreciate that not everybody wants to do it like that, and you should have the day you want within reason. But I do think that spending £30K (unless you're a zillionaire) is ridiculous - that's a decent chunk of house deposit. And I think that expecting friends/family to use lots of their own cash (in the case of the Mumsnet dilemma £3K to attend both week long hen and stag dos and the 3 day wedding) to celebrate YOUR special day is just plain wrong. Let's face it, it ain't that special to anyone else.

THIRZAH

I did buy my wedding dress when I got married in the 1970s-it cost £30- but the bridesmaid's dresses were made by the village dressmaker.

My mother and her friends catered for the wedding breakfast which was held in the village hall. The WI (Mum was President) vounteered to wash up etc.

My grandad grew all the flowers. My uncle did the bouquets and my aunt and grandma did the arrangements in the church-they were so good that somebody who saw them the next day asked if they would do the flowers for her wedding.

A friend played the organ, another friend did the photos and my uncle drove me to the church.

We did have to pay for the priest although my Mum pointed out that if I'd married a Baptist instead of a Catholic we could have got my cousin to marry us!

kittiej

Thirzah - your wedding day arrangements (and others I've read on this thread) sounds perfect and so much more meaningful than just throwing money at things like cars, food, flowers etc.

Possession - when did you get married if it only cost you £50 (if you don't mind me asking lol)

Possession

I got married 16 years ago, and £50 was the cost of the registry office. I already had a non-wedding dress, and DH wore his work suit. We had 16 guests and my parents kindly hosted. They provided the buffet food, and my PILs provided the toast and wine. My mum made a cake. So it strictly cost about £170 all-in or so I should think.
That was just what we wanted, I know it's quite different to what most people want!

fuddle

Caught up but all I can remember is germolene as moisturiser!

A horrible, horrible day for me. Very busy and lots to be concerned about but all is ok now. Very busy but did get up to Ikea (drove at 50mph to try to preserve my petrol) I did only just get candles and tealights so feel like I've wasted my petrol anyway but at least I got a look out.

Come home to find an email from Council Tax saying they're sending out a revised bill for over 12 months

Hoping for a better night sleep for you nightowls. I think I will hopefully drift off before I get up the stairs!

Catch up tomorrow x

tattycath

Our wedding was under 2 k and that included the reception (parents paid for) photos were taken by my cousin. We didn't have posh cars-just put some ribbon on my BIL and nephews car. Good friends bought our cake. We got a special deal on the hotel as we had the reception there. The most expensive thing was my dress-it's in a box at the moment but don't really know what to do with it. It was a size 16-in the sale for half price and the wedding dress shop altered it to fit me-size 10-12. So even if I put it on eb@y, as it was altered to my measurements I don't know if it would be any good for anyone else

Pooky

Our wedding was around £350 (including the rings) and we had 40 guests. Simple registry office, I had a new dress £20 (black velvet that I've worn several times since and a jacket that I sold on for a profit), DH wore his work suit, but had a new tie. DDs had dresses and cardis as our bridesmaids, the dresses sold on for nearly 3times what I paid for them. We did all the food ourselves, a few roast joints, pasta salads, homemade bread rolls and cakes etc. no booze as everyone was driving. It was simple but perfect.

A friend remortgaged her (mortgage free) house to pay £30k for a wedding. Utter madness.

meanmarie

Evening all,

Had a busy but fruitful day...did some badly needed food shopping, made some jam and some bread, so feeling very good, if knackered.

Been a really nice day here weatherwise, so enjoying that too...picked 2lbs gooseberries sitting on a garden chair with Mossy for help....like when you take children to the supermarket.......

Germolene....the sticky pink kind in a round tin, kept me glued together as a child, I was apparently very accident prone. We always had Dettol not TCP. A snack between meals was bread and jam or rhubarb with a paper twist of sugar for dipping or an apple if it was the right time of the year....we had 4 trees so they lasted quite a bit. I was born in 1945 and at that stage our village had no water, sewerage or electricity supply, when I went to secondary school in 1957 I had to travel all the way to the city with a packed lunch...8.00-5.30 except for Saturday when we finished at 12.30...near where I got my bus there was a shop which did wonderful remnants and I can remember buying material and going home to make a dress to wear to the 'hop' in the parish hall that night.

I married in 1970 and bought my dress and my one bridesmaid's dress in a boutique in a shopping centre....not a wedding dress, just a white one I liked....it cost a fiver! On the morning of the wedding I decided that it was too long and took 2 inches off the hem...my mother was horrified. There were 55 people at the reception and I think that it cost £100, including the toast....no evening reception, week long hen do or very expensive honeymoon.

Mind has now gone into reverse, so rather than bore you further I will wish you all a good night, lots of sleep for those who are finding it difficult.

Marie