The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

EstherH

GINNYKNIT: Try phoning them up and explaining. DH did this on health reasons expecting them to say send in a GPs letter and they just deferred it. It was a good few years before he got called again and there was another reason he couldn't do it so they deferred it again for what they said was the last time but it is a good few years now so maybe that would take you over the age limit? Worth a try and he didn't have to write in or send any evidence, although we were willing to, either time. HTH. Esther x

alfsmum

Apple crumble and custard sounds lovely :) wouldn't it be nice if we could all sit round a big table and put the world to rights over a bowl of custard :rotfl:

On the subject of students and bus fares, we pay 15 pounds a week for Dd16 s bus, plus an extra fiver on Wednesdays when her course finishes at 11.30am but the college bus doesn't leave till 4.30 so she gets a bus into the city, another to our town then hopefully I pick her up or it's another two pounds for the bus home. Put simply, the whole CB goes on her bus fares.

We have also lost CB for Dd18 now that she has started Uni but the costs of keeping her haven't decreased. She pays three pounds a day to park, plus petrol and car running costs. We have paid these for her since she passed her test, but have warned her that next year's will have to come out of her maintenance loan as Dd16 will be 17 in January so we have to be fair and pay for her lessons. We have a small amount set aside to get her a little car when she passes her test, so hopefully she will be able to drive to college next year and don't have the very long 12 hour day she does now with the times the bus runs.

It would be nice to have more support for teenagers who stay on and study rather than sign on to the dole. With both Dh's income and mine, we are always just above any thresholds for extra help. As I have been off sick for several months my income is going down and my salary will disappear if I am not back at work by the end of the year. dd18 would then qualify for a bigger bursary so I can see why a couple of colleagues took early retirement when it was offered. Now they are on pensions, their children qualify for full grants and loans. I am proud that both my girls have part time jobs as well as their studies but I can see very little being done to encourage them. Why work and study every day of the week while people who left school with you lie in bed all day and claim benefits. Crazy.

Mini rant over:p

Talking of work, I'm off now to make my way to the office. Part of getting back to work is trying to drive there several times a week and get into the building without feeling too anxious. I've managed four visits in the last fortnight but it doesn't get any easier. Still, I shall give it a go and hope the traffic isn't too bad.

MAR, the sun is out now. Sending some your way.

Rang the hospital, Mum is fine, has fracture clinic this afternoon so will be in same hospital for now.

Pooky

The public transport round here is silly expensive, it would cost me £5.50 return to the local town centre which is around 4miles away. DD2 gets a council subsidised bus pass that's £100 per year and can be used anytime/anyday. DD2s bus pass is £625 per year now, again, she can use it 24/7 so it does come in handy. We saved for a good few years to make sure we could give her driving lessons and she took 28 lessons and passed first time! (clever girl) but insurance is beyond us at the moment. She's on DHs motorbility insurance for free but can only use the car to ferry DH around or on trips that benefit him. Hoping by the time she goes to Uni her insurance will be low enough that if she stays local we can get her a car. If she moves away then we can't help her at all. (she's looking at a London Uni next weekend and the halls are £127 pw!!!!!) barmy!

Freezer and larder inventory done and 36 days worth of evening meals are planned, can do a good few lunches but breakfasts will need some thinking about. I'm going to crack right down on portion control (we could both do with losing some weight) so wish me luck (im secretly hoping to make those 36 days stretch to 50 by adding a bit more bulk (veg/pulses etc) it can be done!!

alfsmum

ginnyknit wrote: »

So we are all off to MrsLW for soup and crumble...fab...just get my shoes on....:D

Just got a letter for jury service, are they having a laugh? I did it 20 years ago and got a child molester trial, it was hell and now they want me to do it again. I do hope as a carer I am exempt as the sheer stress of getting there after leaving everything set up here for OH would be ridiculous. He would not cope without me, even with carers. there was a letter with it in 7 different languages, how the hell could you sit on a jury if you can';t speak English :mad:

And breathe.... not broken it to hubby yet, may well right and beg to be let off and tell him if I fail.

Ginny, just seen your post. Am sure you have valid reason for not serving again. Dont worry, have some soup and crumble with Lyn.

gailey_2

savingqueen wrote: »

forgot to say gailey - good to hear you are so proactive and trying so hard to be positive. You are doing everything possible to provide for your family - you are great with bargain hunting and batch cooking, taking your children out to cheap/free places and keeping everything ticking over. Well done on those YSs - our Mr T's is rubbish at reductions, wish I could find somewhere that did good YSs.

You are doing so well, keep on going and fingers crossed your benefits will come through next week. Don't forget the library to keep kids entertained for free.

sq:)

Thanks im really trying to be positive.

on the positive front last few days

*Lush sunny day-getting some washing dry but still missing my drier.

*broke my hermit/non social mood and went on free organised walk in huge wood near us to look at fungus was really interesting dident get anything edible but got one that helps sharpen kitchen knives was huge group 50 people lots kids, took my 7 year old who had fun as other kids there hoping to take whole family on next one in few weeks time a bush walk surviving/living off the land. Was nice to meet different types of people other than where I live , explore new areas not been before hoping if keep being brave and pushing myself out comfort zone may make future potential real life friends as find making friends n real life quite hard area im in is so cliquey, I dread toddler groups, slowly making contacts in eldest school and been there a year now.

Made some yummy meals today s reduced lamb steak 89p plus reduced bean/veg mix 9p to make a casserole.

Defrosting some cherries to make cherry flapjacks as out of biscuits.

Have checked out freezer have 7-10 days worth meals left then gets bit dire.

Its just milk we struggling with right now, had to top up coffee and sugar seems like we always running out of stuff.

School harvest festival at church today.was lovely.

My 4year old went off to preschool happy in her new clothes denim jacket and skirt 25p each at jumble sale friday. Also got 1 xmas prsent for eldest for for 30p brand new in box and some cheap 20p books and puzzles do love a good jumble sale means the kids feel as if they never go without . Thanks to my bargain hunting they always look nice mostly in branded labels , have odd treats and birthdays and xmas they have plenty.

Im trying to keep to a list as eldest needs new coat she wants very specific one so looking on ebay.

Her new school shoes not faring well. we brought them new from john lewis as were £25 compared to 40 clarkes/startrite shocking how much kids shoes are feels morally wrong!All mien quite wide too. Hopefully jl be no quibble never got bad service from them.

Talking of shoes-small boy I need to get him measured but so few shoes shops easily about they all city centre or out of town shopping centres really bugs me. His size 7 seem bit snug.

Brought some size 8trainers new with tags but 2nd hand price for £5 they lovely but too big not to bothered he grow into them.
Then saw some size 7 next ones were so cute thourght might fit£3 they dident so need relist those.Then by chance some free clarkes 7.5g came up collected they lovely and they fit.

Also picked up free jam jars to make xmas pressies and some ramakins which ideal for kiddy portion jelly, plus some free bottles for youngest.

Hubby has started new job today bit nervous.

Plus trainng is another city so will incure petrol costs and he dont get paid by them until end of the month.

Now the negatives.

hes been unemployed for 24days! without pay.

He did 1 day agency work per week as thats all they could offer him.

rang tax credit on monday dident get form until friday then they said onec its in takes 3working weeks.

Jsa initially said he probably wouldent get it then they said he would. he signed off end last week told he would get 2weeks jsa as they dont pay first 3days then they said you get 1 days pay then rest to follow they dident say when . They owe him £220 today they paid £16 guess 1 day. Have no idea when rest will get paid and we need it. will he have to wiat another week or worse 2weeks? do they only pay weekly on a monday?
Sorry ths is new to me.

Last week he rang housing we in system they processing but not got round to ours. They have no idea or do we when they will pay or how much? We desperatly hoping this week as its been 24days without any benefits.

we fortunate we sensible and had food in house, we fortunate hubby picked up some agency work that allowed us to buy some food. But on serious point family with 3 young children how do they think we can survive this long.

We also fortunate we got 2 weeks pay old job which allowed us to pay rent and bills, we put debts on hold, taken 1 car off road, hubbys commited stop smoking, cancelled his contacts.

So im feeling bit stressed. need some dental work which cant afford so delaying until november as at moment we entitled to nothing until tax credits processed and need hubby to be off week day as next town over and hes in training every weekday for next 4weeks.

Today had to tell eldest she may only get 1 day school dinners this week and she whined.
Hes started new job 21k pa which is over 16k threshold for free school dinners and the changes governement announced other week starting next sept are infants only all juniors can go hungry!

Just feeling bit fed up of it all we wanted short term help theres no urgency and once hes back working after training probably wont be entitled to much anyways.

Im looking at jobs but need night work to fit in with hubbys job and childcare which is proving hard to find will keep trying as sometimes royal mail have xmas jobs.

Trying to be positive new beginings and make most of what we got, whats free and cheap.

sweetcorn and tomatoes nearly ready in the garden.

The cost of buses is extortinate. I dont get why its ok to give free passes to very wealthy pensioners yet make kids pay to get to school seniors is £60 a month here per child £600 per year its huge outgoing combined with £40 per month school dinners per child.

We tend to walk miles even with kids as buses so expensive and rubbish here. when i chat to elderly at bus top they shocked how expensive it is as they all have passes. Im totally against them penalsing under 25,s if they can work at 16, pay tax, get married, vote and have kids than how can they deny them help when they need it just glad mine not near that age yet but feel for people who do have older kids as there,s no council tax excemption for students now so not only do you lose cb, tax credits you now still have to feed them, pay council tax, help them with clothing/transport costs.

Hope every ones doing ok.

savingqueen

Afternoon toughies,

Better day as my back is slowly getting better, managed school run and pottering about indoors with rests but not chancing any more driving than school runs. DH is at an important work event and not contactable by phone and I know he is worried if my back goes again. He just rang me and was relieved to hear I am managing.

We have lovely sunshine today after a misty start so that is also helping me feel more cheery .

DH has decided to have a chat with the other nice tutor tomorrow (different tutors for different days) and see if she thinks he can get through the course. I think he is resigned to sticking it and maybe the "I'll show you, you beep beep" approach will work FairyP!!

DH emailed his mum a friendly note yesterday with some typed contributions from the kids. I sent a delayed thankyou from kids for something my sister posted to them a while back and a little note about how they are doing. Also sent my mum a very brief email to say hello and update her on the boys. We are trying to keep communication lines open for the boys' sakes but are not backing down on what we expect from them ie. to be treated civilly and fairly. I can see us gradually edging back to seeing them all and just sweeping everything under the carpet. Feel as if we are caught in a catch 22 situation - awful if we don't see them, awful if we do. I am dreading speaking to MIL, she is a skilled emotional blackmailer and I am going to do my utmost not to be drawn into her games and just say what I want to, be a bit cold and calculated I guess (which is the
opposite of my normal self)

Pooky, I am impressed with your 36-50 meals planned. If I can do a week's worth and stick to it I am pleased with myself! Still I am getting more OS over time, just very slow progress. Once my back is better, I am going to base my meal plans on the freezer contents as Chesty is very icy these days.

I don't know how you manage to keep children at college/uni. I don't know how we will manage, just concentrating on getting through primary school and transition to secondary school next for DS9.

Hope you get some rest alfsmum, you are so busy at the moment with everything. Get well wishes to your mum - she is naughty not keeping her weight off her leg but I guess there is nothing much the nurses can do if she fancies a potter, hospitals get so boring don't that?

the warmest of wishes to you all my friends
sq

kidcat

Ginny - call them and see what you can do, I would assume they will happily defer as they would need to bear the cost of providing alternate carers I believe?

Gailey - Have a hug, I know its so little and I wish I were closer to offer at least a proper one. Benefits are in complete disarray, and the fact is that its to deter people from claiming at all. Hope it all gets settled soon for you

paidinchickens

alfsmum wrote: »

Apple crumble and custard sounds lovely :) wouldn't it be nice if we could all sit round a big table and put the world to rights over a bowl of custard :rotfl:

What a fab idea I'm always up for more custard (value of course)

Pooky wrote: »

She's on DHs motorbility insurance for free but can only use the car to ferry DH around or on trips that benefit him.

Thinking of all the places your DH gets dragged to to cover you on car insurance.

Town 2am ..... bored, needed kebab etc DD wide eyed and DH being driven in his PJS

Sat outside relevant friends houses then left in car because she's forgotten about him

Can't imagine if it was my DD where she would have to go and take DH with her, the places he would end up :rotfl:

ETC ETC it cheered me up then I thought

Thankfully we don't have Dr's that specialise in Gynecology (apart from the hospital) because how would DH explain that was "in his interests"

This made me laugh in my head (strange place) but I don't think it's come down in writing well

Well at least the pain killers must be working

PiC x

paidinchickens

Gailey.

It would be easier if you actually knew rather than the one person saying one thing the other another. How can anyone work around that.

Things must be getting really bad as we are around quite a lot of farmland and there are rows of crops being stolen and the allotments are getting hit quite a lot and we are in quite a well off area.

Now where did I leave my spade

I don't know what to say to you apart from The government are all sh1teless wonders who............blah blah.........we have said it all before.........live in the real world to$$ers

I know it doesn't help but if you shout it loud enough it releases frustration.

PiC

boultdj

paidinchickens wrote: »

Gailey.

It would be easier if you actually knew rather than the one person saying one thing the other another. How can anyone work around that.

Things must be getting really bad as we are around quite a lot of farmland and there are rows of crops being stolen and the allotments are getting hit quite a lot and we are in quite a well off area.

Now where did I leave my spade

I don't know what to say to you apart from The government are all sh1teless wonders who............blah blah.........we have said it all before.........live in the real world to$$ers

I know it doesn't help but if you shout it loud enough it releases frustration.

PiC

So does kneading bread........you just pretend it's the person's head who's peeing you off that your working on...........