The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

GreyQueen

Evening all.

Oooh, a lush dinner all prepared - nomnomnom. Enjoy it lots.

Fuddle, your sister's house sounds very nice and you'd have to be a saint not to hear all about it and feel a little bit green-eyed monster, IYKWIM.

Just acknowledge it and let is pass over. She may or may not live to regret her choices but they are her choices, and she won't thank you for trying to counsel caution.

One thing life has taught me, accompanied by several smacks upside the head and emotional angst, is that you have to leave people alone to do things which to you, with their best wishes at heart, look foolish.

You'll bite your lip now and you'll bite your lip if it goes wrong, because no one wants to hear I told you so.

(((Monnagran))) feeling for you, pet, and wincing in recognition of the remark about church politics. SuperGran has been a member of her congregation of 40 years and a dedicated churchwarden, putting in as many as 30 hours a week and up and down to that church several times a day.

Til a couple of months back when her Rev (also a personal friend) seems to have blown a gasket and there was the most dreadful row and Rev told SG not to come back. The congregation is gutted and many of them have stopped attending, and are visiting with and phoning SG and inviting her on outings etc etc.

SG is taking her religious sustenance at the cathedral these days. She's stoic but the whole matter has left a sour taste. Makes me glad that I'm a heathen.

Went to work and came home again, visited SG and had a natter. Am ignoring the ironing in hopes that it will evaporate.

savingqueen

Fuddle re your sister and new house. Its is hard sometimes seeing others we know with what we would like. DH's brother and family live in a massive detached house, their hall is the size of our only reception room, in fact it might be a little bigger. They have several bathrooms, a massive garden and live in a beautiful area. Kids get to do all sorts of sports, horseriding, piano lessons every week and several expensive holidays a year. A little bit of me is envious I will admit - we would love to give our kids the same and I get annoyed with their attitudes. If I mention our budget or money worries, they will say oh yes we know what you mean about prices rising or whatever - do they heck!!

However the bottom line is I would never choose to be them. SIL and BIL are cold fish. Their kids don't run to the door when their dad gets home from work, they don't even lift their heads from a screen (if they are home that is) to say hello to him. My boys charge at DH when he comes in, so pleased to see him and tell him about their day. There are many other examples just like that, that money can't buy. I wouldn't trade their privileges for my family closesness and warmth for all the money in the world. You really can't buy happiness - look at your signature and keep on believing. If anyone can realise their dreams, it will be you.

sq:)

shegar

MRS CHIP.......Thats a super little chap you have there, my son rescues a baby blackbird earlier this year , he raised it on damp mealworms, maggots, he is doing very well...........

Ive got a hedgehog that comes in the garden at dusk every night , he goes to the birdfeeders and the the odds laying about......Rosie dont even know he comes cos she cant see or hear anything properly anymore, but bo the patterdale isnt keen at all, he runs around the house at full pelt up the sofas, everywhere, trying to get out..........I have to shut the all the doors now about 8.15 pm, cos I know the hog will soon be on the prow...........

Also got loads of hummingbird hawk moths here , on the buddleia, verbena boneriensis, lovely to see them...........

FUDDLE.......I f I were you I wouldnt say anything negative about your sisters plans for moving into a bigger home, obviously she wont listen , I think its most womens dreams to have a lovely home, and nothing right now will dampen her spirits, she will see you as being jealous of her.......

Be pleased for her and get on with your own life..........She wont take any notice of what you say about your bankrupt problems , because she hasnt been through it herself..........

We lost our home many many years ago , and gradually got ourselves back on the housing ladder, just live for today and see what happens later on, you really cant plan that far ahead, enjoy what youve got, you and your family have good health , thats the best anyone can have.................Its a lovely evening here , sun now going down , better get the hog food ready....:)..Sheila

[Deleted User]

MONNAGRAN politics of every kind tend to leave many casualties who have been trodden over roughshod for many diverse reasons, I hate to think of you and the rev being caught up in it all through no fault of your own other than existing in the first place. There are several alternatives available should you need any of them

1) A tin hat and a dustbin lid shield.
2) 2 x 1 way tickets to the mainland and my spare room.
3) A kalachnikov to clear the problems!!!
4) a packet of tissues and a large packet of paracetamol together with as much tolerance as we can all muster to send to you!

I wish you much tolerance and forbearance to go with the caring and kindness and love that you both already have in abundance, and a speedy solution to the problems besetting you at the moment, Love Lyn xxx.

stiltwalker

SQ - what a lovely post and how lovely (though not surprising given how your family sounds) for you DH to get such a greeting!

Mrs Chip - How utterly cute is Little Mr Al!

Monnagran - hugs, petty politics is always horrid, whether it's church, village, school or anywhere else. Can manage to join Mrs LW in sending tissues and paracetamol and possibly a little something alcoholic for a discrete hip flask if necessary however I'm usually using up all my tolerance quota dealing with my MIL!

Another fab stay and play today - although we did manage to leave DD's armbands in the swimming pool, I'm sure they will still be there on Wednesday though. Had a hotdog for my lunch (they'd all run out last week) - made my day,I have such a weakness for them! Not exactly haute cuisine but who cares!!

Hugs to anyone I've missed and anyone who needs one - X

fuddle

I won't say a word, not now, not ever. She is a very lucky girl to get the house of her dreams. Who am I to shatter that with my tales of be careful eh?

At least if I move I have something to come back to my home town for... the fire and the kitchen range! no I'm kidding.. actually if I can't have the esse ironheart I quite fancy a pot belled stove in the kitchen.

I knew it was down to meddling folk Monnagran! Will you be given somewhere to live? Is that a given. I don't have to worry do I?

EstherH

SQ: Would you really want to clean all those toilets!!!!
Seriously, having a close loving family beats cold money any day.

Esther x

monnagran

GQ: Don't be too complacent about being a heathen, my dear. One of the Rev's favourite sayings is, "The church is full of hypocrites and there's room for plenty more."
Come to think of it, perhaps it's not so surprising that they don't want us to stay. The hierarchy is not too keen on their ministers stepping out of line. They much prefer them to be quiet and conventional. Fat chance!
Poor SG though. What a rotten way to treat her. Do give her our love and assure her that she doesn't suffer alone.

MrsLW: I find the thought of a Kalachnikov very appealing.
If you answer your doorbell one day and find two fat ladies on the doorstep, one wearing a dog collar and a Bible and the other wearing rubber gloves and a martyred expression, you'll only have yourself to blame. Two black coffees, one with and one without, please.

Stiltwalker: Sadly the Rev is teetotal but I AM NOT. A hip flask sounds good. A two litre bottle sounds better.

SQ: you have got your priorities absolutely right. Always remember - "A person is rich only in what can never be taken away from them."
Big houses, money, cars etc can be lost, as well a lot of us know, but the love and happy memories of your children will last for ever.

x

PS. No, you're quite safe Fuddle, we're moving into Lyn's spare room.

fuddle

Nah, nah don't be going there monnagran. That's my other hidey hole. I don't think I can cope with you both and The Rev :eek:

Seriously though. How do you feel about it? Are you ok?

I went to go pick those apples last night. I found that someone (unless we have monkeys around here :cool: ) has snapped many of the higher branches and cleared the bigger, redder apples. Why snap the branches :mad: Now they will no longer bare fruit. I was extremely cross. I picked the lower fruit like I intended and threw one to my apple expert AKA Alfie. He likes an apple or two He wouldn't touch it. They must have been very sour. I go with my instinct in life and just left them.

We walked on to collect blackberries. Boy oh boy. I have a lot. I am going to freeze in weekly batches and use for packed lunches when girls get back to school. I am going to bake today too. Don't know what yet.

Again, although different place this year, the blackberries are not being picked. Many are going soft. I can't believe it. They are along a walkway and cycle track - I want to scream 'it's free, what's wrong with people!' and then I think that we must just be in the minority. Eldest had fun though, little DD is going today on her scooter. I'm hoping it will be one of those things the remember doing as children and keep it up.

Making scratch chilli with spices again. Last weeks was nice but you could tell there was no cumin in it. Cumin bought so looking forward to it. Thanks about browning the mince. I've been missing a trick all this time. 'twas lovely.

GreyQueen

Ooh, breaking branches to get at fruit. That is so ignorant.

Yet I see it all the time. There's a coupla wild plums near my allotment and the kids use branches to knock them down (often breaking the plum tree branches in the process) and then use them as missiles.

Words fail me. They're small golden yellow and scarlet plums (one tree of each) and absolutely delicious. And kids throw them at each other?!

Sheesh. The blackberriers were out for the first time this weekend, although they're only just starting to ripen and a lot are still red. They look pretty small which I attribute to the rain. I may go berrying at the weekend, just enough to have a pie or two. My mini-freezer is rammed and I'm not into jam-making so I won't take more than I can use.

I really like seeing people blackberrying, esp whole families with their young children, I think it's teaching good skills. I fell about laughing when I saw blackberries for sale in the supermarket for the first time as I couldn't believe anyone would fork over cash for what they can get for free, but apparently they do.

Right, better get some brekkie and be ready to face the day. I'm cooking chili tonight, as well, by co-incidence.

Have a good day, everyone, GQ xx