Ex wife in my house with new partner

merlot123

http://www.cab.org.nz/vat/fp/d/Pages/Wills.aspx

See near end of page. Get a lawyer tomorrow to get it sorted, there are ways not to hand over your inheritance.

Molly41

Im going to say that it is not reasonable to insist that she sells the house when the youngest child is 18. That child may be in education and really now the government classes the age of 25 more as a cut off point.

monty-doggy

That's great information, thank you. I feel a bit better now.

As far as I am concerned, I don't want anything to change other than my name off that house, it seems the only way that will happen is it being sold. Well it does need to happen.

I'm going to see a solicitor and try and agree that she stays in the house until MY youngest is 18 or leaves full time education or leaves home before education is finished, and at that point she either buys me out at a set percentage or the house is sold and proceeds split.
I don't want any rent from them.

If she defaults one more time I want that to be a trigger point for forcing the sale.

Does this sound plausible?

I want a divorce too!

neneromanova

Just a quick thought, I thought legal aid stopped in April so if you divorce now, she won't be able to get legal aid. Just a thought anyway.

monty-doggy

neneromanova wrote: »

Just a quick thought, I thought legal aid stopped in April so if you divorce now, she won't be able to get legal aid. Just a thought anyway.

That did cross my mind, she would have to pay to fight me. I want to be reasonable, she can stay in the house providing no more defaults, but as I can't move on or buy, I'm not giving up my share (although I don't envisage much equity as she's paying interest only but even if house prices rise, I'd want my portion out of principal)

I just want a clean break and to move on.

Paradigm

monty-doggy wrote: »

That did cross my mind, she would have to pay to fight me. I want to be reasonable, she can stay in the house providing no more defaults, but as I can't move on or buy, I'm not giving up my share (although I don't envisage much equity as she's paying interest only but even if house prices rise, I'd want my portion out of principal)

I just want a clean break and to move on.

If you have been (continuously) seperated for 5 years or more the only grounds she can contest a divorce on are ones of "hardship" &, given what you have posted, this won't apply....

ETA: Chuck in the adultery & it's a slam dunk

Guest101

Why are you supporting her financially anyway? Just stop that now to all but the essentials. (IE Child Support)

Then Buy everything your kids need. Your not divorced, so you dont need to contribute to her living, and now she has another mug to do that anyway.

Once divorced, she wont be entitled to anything.

Would you fight for custody? I would if I was you, then she can pay you child support, which you can put to good use, ie saving for thei future.

Certainly pay the mortgage direct to the lender if your gonna do that. She's a liability, and you really do not want to be tied in to her for 15+ years - get divorce sorted asap.

Then, 'when's my money coming in' back to her!

Guest101

Molly41 wrote: »

Im going to say that it is not reasonable to insist that she sells the house when the youngest child is 18. That child may be in education and really now the government classes the age of 25 more as a cut off point.

The clause can be, once the youngest child reaches 18, and/or finishes full time education (to whatever level)

25 is far too old.

If your 25 and you live with your parents......

monty-doggy

Guest101 wrote: »

Why are you supporting her financially anyway? Just stop that now to all but the essentials. (IE Child Support)

Then Buy everything your kids need. Your not divorced, so you dont need to contribute to her living, and now she has another mug to do that anyway.

Once divorced, she wont be entitled to anything.

Would you fight for custody? I would if I was you, then she can pay you child support, which you can put to good use, ie saving for thei future.

Certainly pay the mortgage direct to the lender if your gonna do that. She's a liability, and you really do not want to be tied in to her for 15+ years - get divorce sorted asap.

Then, 'when's my money coming in' back to her!

Fighting for custody isn't an option at the minute, I need to work full time and other than financials, she is a good mum to our kids. They don't want to leave her. They love being with me every weekend but when it was suggested they live with me the eldest two were upset at the thought of leaving mums. It's not the right thing to do as much as I'd love to have them all the time.

I agree tho paying extra needs to stop which I will.

*max*

Guest101 wrote: »

.

Certainly pay the mortgage direct to the lender if your gonna do that. She's a liability, and you really do not want to be tied in to her for 15+ years - get divorce sorted asap.

I don't think the OP has been paying the mortage, or given his ex the money for it. She pays the mortgage alone, from what I understood.